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Where the heck is Superman?

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  • Where the heck is Superman?

    Where is Superman this week?
    9
    He's busy being mentioned in the Legends of Tomorrow trailer
    0%
    2
    Golfing with Batman
    0%
    2
    Buying Star Wars tickets
    0%
    3
    Looking for Krypto
    0%
    1
    Auditioning to play Ray Palmer
    0%
    0
    Something else (Leave a comment)
    0%
    1

  • #2
    We were golfing....

    Comment


    • #3
      Clearly, CBS Superman aka "CBS Blur" was in a cage match with CW's own "Blur" aka SV Clark over who gets to claim the title of TV's current "Superman".

      (After an indecisive, boring 9 rounds ...)

      CBS Blur Superman aka Supergirl's Supes: "I've been Superman on Supergirl since Day One, buddy. You were Superman for, what, 10 seconds in your season finale ... after 10 long years!

      CW Blur Superman aka SV Clark: Oh yeah, well at least they've seen my face! You show up like some ghost for 10 seconds in the pilot and then another 5 seconds in that Reactron fight. What's up with that?

      CBS Supes: They don't see my face? They don't see your face! That's the point -- and why they called you the Blur! Heck, I don't know why they called you that, when you look like some discount version of the Punisher in that overcoat get-up.

      SV Clark: Enough with the knocks against my costume selection. I wore the S-shield, that automatically makes me Superman!

      CBS Supes: Hmm, let's see. I got the cape. You don't. I got the S-shield on an actual costume. You got the S-shield on, what, a T-shirt from Hot Topic? I got the boots, you got brown oxfords. CBS Superman -- for the win!

      Netflix' Daredevil: I can't even see and I can tell that neither of you are Superman. You're both freaking blurs to me. Clark, you played a civilian for 10 years and only took on the mantle in the series finale. CBS Supes, I don't even know if you're a real being or some CGI mirage. The show isn't even about you anyway. While you guys are at it, tone down all that melodrama crap on both your shows.

      (SV Clark mutters: It's too late for me, we're off the air. That ship has sailed. )

      CBS Supes: Dude, we're trying ... but don't you want to hear how James and Lucy fix their complicated on-again, off-again relationship?

      Daredevil: No!

      SV Clark: Actually that's my favourite part. That, and all the friend-zone stuff Kara's going through. Winn, that guy can't catch a break. (CBS Supes and SV Clark get into juvenile quarrel about who is best for Kara. Supes says James, Clark says Winn.)

      Daredevil (to TDK Batman): Can you believe this?

      TDK Batman (flipping through scrapbook of TDK trilogy, grins at 2008 news clippings recounting the time TDK beat out Iron Man in the box office): Oh, sorry. I stopped caring about what those two divas were up to after Round 3. Slap fights are totally boring ...

      Daredevil: Whose idea was it to make this 15 rounds?

      SV Clark: Mine actually. (to CBS Supes) -- and can't Kara see that she's got a totally great friend and confidant that also would make a great bf?

      CBS Supes: Well, I guess you are the expert on occupying the friend-zone. How long was it till you finally got together with Lana officially. Like, 6+ years?! And, oh wait, Lex put you back in the friend-zone for good when he freaking kryptonized her! An allergy kept you apart. A Clanallergy!!!

      Daredevil: Better call the fire department, Clark -- you just got burned.

      SV Clark: I'm calling a time-out. Cause: bruised feelings.

      Daredevil: They should just call it a draw -- they're both freaking Blurs. Cuz Superman, they ain't. And ... wait for it *microphone feedback* ... there's the mic drop."

      Comment


      • #4

        For a second there, it felt like I died for real. Because I was dying of laughter.

        Comment


        • #5
          Superman was busy consoling Lois over getting beaten out by Cat for the Siegel Prize.

          Comment


          • #6
            To hell with Krypto, He is out looking for Shelby.

            Comment

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