'Jorel' Soap Appreciation Thread

[Mar-El]

This thread is designed for all those lovers of Jorel soap. We are forever indebted to this episode for introducing such a great product. If anyone's ever been to the "Make up a Smallville spoof" thread, then they know just how large of an impact Jorel soap has had on our enjoyment of the show.

For your convenience, a link to that thread can be found here: http://www.kryptonsite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=71980

Imagine my surprise to find out that Jorel soap wasn't real. I thought I could have the power of Jor-El at my fingertips, but it seems to be something that only exists in the Smallville universe.

I think they should retcon most of the series to work Jorel soap into the storyline.

For example:
- In the beginning of Season 4, there should have been a story-arc involving Lionel in prison and his desperate attempt to not drop the Jorel soap.

Or, alternatively

- In Quest (7x19), Lex could have discovered that Jorel soap can lead him to the Traveler. This will come as a surprise to him and to longtime fans who know he's been using Jorel soap products since season 1 (it helps keep his bald sheen). You could say it was right under his nose the entire time.

Just think of the endless possibilities there are with Jorel soap.

[Twitch]

This. Thread. Is. Awesome.

I wish Jorel soap was real, I'd wash myself with it everyday, I'd be very clean and very happy.

[oberyn]

I think Jorel soap would definitely encourage proper hygiene.

I can see the commercials now.

Parent: Did you wash your hands before dinner?

Kid: No. I don't want to.

Jorel Soap (voice emanating from bathroom): This defiance cannot go without consequence.

Kid: [Runs to bathroom and hurriedly washes hands]

Parent: Thanks, Jorel.

[Twitch]

I think Jorel soap would definitely encourage proper hygiene.

I can see the commercials now.

Parent: Did you wash your hands before dinner?

Kid: No. I don't want to.

Jorel Soap (voice emanating from bathroom): This defiance cannot go without consequence.

Kid: [Runs to bathroom and hurriedly washes hands]

Parent: Thanks, Jorel.

LMAO!

[Mar-El]

You know, I was wondering to myself today. If they made more of the show about Jorel soap, then maybe critics would be justified in labelling Smallville a "soap" opera.

I think season 4 would benefit from a little rewriting. For example, Clark could gather the Soaps of Power instead. He would have to bring together three different Jorel soap products (hand sanitizer, face cleanser and body soap). These three Soaps of Power would unite to create an awesome cleaning experience.

I think Jorel soap products should be added to the first season, as well. In Drone, when that high school guy was washing his face, he could have been washing it with Jorel soap. Then when the bees try to attack him moments later, they would find their stingers rebuffed by the awesome power of Jorel.

Or when Clark returns brainwashed in Crusade (was his brain washed with Jorel soap, I wonder?), he could say "I am Kal-El of Krypton. It is time for me to fill my bath-tub." Then he would knock Martha out of the way, walk upstairs and draw a hot bath in order to get the most out of his Jorel soap.

This. Thread. Is. Awesome.

I wish Jorel soap was real, I'd wash myself with it everyday, I'd be very clean and very happy.

Glad you appreciate it as much as I do

I think Jorel soap would definitely encourage proper hygiene.

I can see the commercials now.

Parent: Did you wash your hands before dinner?

Kid: No. I don't want to.

Jorel Soap (voice emanating from bathroom): This defiance cannot go without consequence.

Kid: [Runs to bathroom and hurriedly washes hands]

Parent: Thanks, Jorel.

That is both an amazing and plausible scenario

[xrayvision]

Jorel, killing disease carrying germs since 2007.

----- Added 3 Minutes later -----

Jorel soap---being used to wash out the mouths of foul-mouthed juveniles since 2007.

[dotsie23]

Jorel, killing disease carrying germs since 2007.

----- Added 3 Minutes later -----

Jorel soap---being used to wash out the mouths of foul-mouthed juveniles since 2007.

[Mar-El]

Awesome

This wouldn't be a proper Jorel soap thread if it did not have any contributions from xrayvision.

---

I was just thinking to myself how much better season 7 would have been if they had reintroduced Jorel soap into the storyline. Instead, the season suffered from a disjointed Veritas storyline. They really dropped the soap on that one.

[Twitch]

Awesome

This wouldn't be a proper Jorel soap thread if it did not have any contributions from xrayvision.

I did a google image search yesterday with "Jorel Soap" and one of the first matches was your avatar xray (well your old one), it was really funny at the time. You'll be forever associated with Jorel Soap.

[TheLeague]

Dettol: kills 99.9% of bacteria

Jorel: kills OVER 9 THOUSAND % of bacteria

FACT!

[TheANIMAL (marcus)]

Jorel soap can freeze, disinfect, alter time and wipe bacteria off the face of the planet if used properly in accordance to guidlines.

[xrayvision]

Prescription grade Jorel soap can also brainwash and mind wipe. The over the counter version is recommended for children up to the age of 17.

----- Added 42 Seconds later -----

BTW, thanks Mar-El & Twitch.

----- Added 2 Minutes later -----

Next up is Jorel dishwasher detergent, to clean up those kinky Olsen whipped cream concoctions.

[xrayvision]

Here's something for those who appreciate Jorel soap:

http://www.kryptonsite.com/forums/showpost.php?p=3835799&postcount=2811

[Mar-El]

So I took the liberty of re-watching that Jorel soap scene in Labyrinth and read the fine print on the bottle.

This is the information I've been able to glean.

Jorel Antibacterial Soap
Made With Pure Jojoba Oil

8.5 fl.oz. A gentle and effective soap suitable for the whole family.

Gentle and Effective fits the bill if we're to believe Raya's testimony of Jor-El in Fallout, earlier that season. We now know in hindsight that she was discussing the properties of Jorel soap.

Furthermore, I can make another inference based on this information. Subterranean, widely believed to be a filler episode, was perhaps the most important episode of the season. It showcased Mexican laborers working in Jed McNally's fields under slave-like conditions.

My assessment: These laborers were actually harvesting Jojoba plants for Jojoba seeds, from which oil extract could be used to manufacture Jorel soap. McNally was in cahoots with Lex Luthor, who undoubtedly had a vested interest in the manufactured Jorel soap because of its awesome properties.

[Karafan1]

I think Jorel soap would definitely encourage proper hygiene.

I can see the commercials now.

Parent: Did you wash your hands before dinner?

Kid: No. I don't want to.

Jorel Soap (voice emanating from bathroom): This defiance cannot go without consequence.

Kid: [Runs to bathroom and hurriedly washes hands]

Parent: Thanks, Jorel.

That is hilarious!!

----- Added 6 Minutes later -----

Hey Mar-El, I bet if you knew somebody that makes labels for bottles you could have a Jorel soap label made