What will Clark write in his new journal?

[xrayvision]

Entry 1:

BDA's log, star...er Earth date 5/4/06:

Wore my red jacket with blue shirt underneath for the 1489th time. I finally figured out the reason I wear it is so that it drives Chloe so crazy that she rips my clothes off. CK out.

Entry 2:

I miss playing with Lex and his Porsche. The fun we used to have. He used to run me off the bridges and I tore the roof off the car and brought some whino to give him CPR. Hmm...maybe next time I can call Desiree Atkins and we can have more fun with Lex. I also miss playing with Lionel and getting bathed in liquid kryptonite at Summerholt. Where are all my buddies? Even Morgan Edge is gone. I also faintly remember someone who started drag racing until the guy he owed $20,000 to croaked in an accident.

[TheVLC]

Dear Journal:

I'm so depressed. I broke up with Lana. Chloe already knows my secret, so lying to her about my powers just isn't the same anymore. Maybe Lois.......yeah, that's it! I can lie a lot to Lois. And then maybe I'll mope around the barn for a while. After that, I might even break a picture frame or something. So much to do. I gotta go......

[canon]

Um...let's see

Entry 1 : Lana needed a break from me

Entry 2: Lana and I are back

Entry 3: I broke up with Lana

Entry 4: Lana and I broke up again.

[moe2death]

Re: What will Clark write in his new journal?

Originally posted by xrayvision
Entry 1:

BDA's log, star...er Earth date 5/4/06:

Wore my red jacket with blue shirt underneath for the 1489th time. I finally figured out the reason I wear it is so that it drives Chloe so crazy that she rips my clothes off. CK out.

Entry 2:

I miss playing with Lex and his Porsche. The fun we used to have. He used to run me off the bridges and I tore the roof off the car and brought some whino to give him CPR. Hmm...maybe next time I can call Desiree Atkins and we can have more fun with Lex. I also miss playing with Lionel and getting bathed in liquid kryptonite at Summerholt. Where are all my buddies? Even Morgan Edge is gone. I also faintly remember someone who started drag racing until the guy he owed $20,000 to croaked in an accident.

omg lmao i still cant stop laughing after i read the party where he worse his red jacket with blue shirt for the 1489th time funny $hit

[xrayvision]

Entry 3:

Strangely enough, I seem to want to buy plastic melons whenever I go to the Talon. I wonder why? They don't even sell fake fruit there.

[The Great Ymmij]

Dear Journal,

I keep forgetting how to use some of my powers such as X-ray vision. People always say they would do anything if they had powers like me, but they don't realize how much I have to think in order to use them. I think so much about abnormal things that I don't even have time to pick out different clothes. I think it saves me time just wearing the same ones. Hmm..I wonder how long I've been wearing this pair of boxers for?

[j-kent]

Dear Diary,

entry 1, 5/4:

Couldn't find Lana's black panties from the episode "mortal", hmp. oh well. But I did find some pictures of the ship...

entry 2:

After Lex threaten me in his loft today yeah i didn't have sh*t to say....so I think it's time his porsche sees the bottom of the bridge.... again...beotch...

[mortalreckoning]

Entry 1
I am from another planet
Entry 2
I can run really fast
Entry 3
I am very strong
Entry 4
I am impervious to harm
Entry5
I can make things burn with my eyes
Entry 6
I can see through things
Entry 7
my favorite colors are red, blue and yellow and I live for plaid
Entry 8
Almost time for my 'bad' Clark vacation in Metropolis...maybe I'll take Chloe
Entry 9
Someone please find some green K and put me out of my misery
Entry 10
If you find this journal, please return to Clark Kent, Smallville, Kansas

[puddinpiester]

mortalreckoning, now if Clark Kent writes that down in his journal, I one of the last holdouts, will finally refer to Clark as the Big Dumb Alien. Heavy sigh.

[Timester]

Dear Journal (first and only Entry):

I'll probably forget that you ever existed. So, for the people of the Phantom Zone that read it, please say hi to Pete from Clark, OK?

[Nospam]

Monday

Lana was mad at me today when I used the word "puke", but to me that's what her apple pie tasted like. Mmm...pie! Well, good pie that is.

Damn, forgot to wear pants today.

Tuesday

Got a phone call from some guy named Pete. Said he was my best friend in high school, but I honestly don't remember any Pete and you'd think I'd remember my best friend. Come on, I'm not some big, dumb alien.

It must have been a telemarketing trick because he kept wanting to sell me some damn CD. I bought a few dozen just to get him off the phone. That'll teach him to mess with Clark Kent.

Wednesday

I just love playing with my telescope. It's beautiful -- long, red and shiny -- but it seems to be broken as it won't stand up pointing at the sky anymore and just sits there limp. I loved when my dad and I would play with it together. Those days are long gone now. Time to put the telescope away, I guess.

Thursday

I've had enough of the door to door salesmen that come by the farm trying to sell their "foreclosure" and "final notice" junk mail. Get lost.

Friday

That Chloe, I think she can be tad paranoid. I've told her a dozen times now that I can't see or feel any funny lumps in her breasts, but every week she's back asking for another test. I guess x-rays are really expensive in Metropolis. Chloe knows darn well she doesn't have to take all her clothes off when I check. X-rays will pass through anything, but she's such a practical joker. Ha ha.

Whew. What a week it's been.

[LionelLuthor]

Nospam, after snapping out of the trance that your avatar induced- I read your post, and what a funny one it is haha

MONDAY: Today I felt like going for a walk with Shelby in the woods- but I couldn't find him any where!! He always seems to disappear for weeks at a time. Any ways, I threw his leash around a cows neck and we had a nice stroll together.
His name's Bernard.

TUESDAY: I ran over to Honduras today, and met up with these girls that I saw on my last trip. Man, they were fun- we made little sculptures of spaceships and everything!!! And I kissed one on the cheek. Take that Lana.

WEDNESDAY: I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror, and decided that I needed a damn good trim! So I jogged over to Lex's mansion and asked him if he knew any good barbers.
He slapped me round the face and called me a slag, and it occured to me "Oh wait, he has no hair." After 5 years I've just noticed that.

THURSDAY: I was knackered from all of my adventures this week. so I just chilled out at home and began watching every season of Friends back to back. Oooh the power of the DVD. I wish I had a bigger TV though, I really should have kept the one that the invisible fella gave me. I love Monica and Chandler.

FRIDAY: I'm still getting through the Friends episodes, I'm only up to 'The one with a chick and a duck'. Boy are they funny GERHOY!
I went to Discount Eddie's in Metropolis (Open all night!) and bought a few bits and pieces. Ran out of room here though, so I dropped off some stuff at the fortress. Bloody hell, Jor El should have at least put some plug points and a satellite dish in there.

SATURDAY: Saved some snotty nosed kid today. What happened was, he'd just learned to tie his own shoes, and couldn't stop showing off. He kept tapping his mum and saying "Look at this. Look at this." So she threw him in front of a car.
I caught him in mid air, but one look at his hot mum sent my heat vision out of control and I ended up singeing his brand new coat.

SUNDAY: Me and Chloe went out to the 'Atlantis' club tonight, because agreed, Chloe needs a night life. She met some guy and went back to his house, but after an X Ray peek at him, I realised he had a small.......brain and wasn't good enough for our Chloe. Wow, I guess I'm starting to get feelings for her.

[angelfire east]

Clark Kent the whining Diarys:

Entry 1 : I miss Lana, I lovvvvvvve her so much!

Entry 2 : I miss Lana, I told Chloe how much I loved Lana today. Told her to spy on Lana but she won't

Entry 3: Stayed up all night watching Lana with my x-ray verison from a near by building. I love her so much.

Entry 4: I hate Lex, stupid sexy ex-best friend's ex-girlfriend stealer blad man

Entry 5: I miss Lana. I love her so much. Skipped farm work today to Lana all day using my x-ray verison.

Entry 6: I miss Lana. I love her so much. Stayed up all night watching her sleep again using my x-ray verison.

Entry 7: I miss Lana. I love her so much. Chloe told me I'm scaring her. Like I'm a stalker or something. Chloe drinks to much coffee it's starting to affect her mind.

Entry 8: I miss Lana. I love her so much. I told Chloe that and she told me to shut up. Women, just because she not getting any.

Entry 9: The world almost ended today, I didn't have a clue what was happeneing; Chloe found out there was a plot to end the world, she hacked into the CIA's computers to find out how and went it's mean to happen. She told me to run to the other side of the world and use my strength to do somehting, I wasn't really listening, I was thinking of Lana. Anyway it all turned out alright because when I got there I phoned Chloe and she told me waht to do. Man being a hero is so hard, I don't know why Chloe's always complaining about all this world she doing and how she has no free time, she's got it easy. I watched Lana gain tonight.I miss Lana, I lovvvvvvve her so much!

Entry 10: Something's wrong with my x-ray verison it's not working.I miss Lana, I love her so much!

Entry 11: I had to watch/follow Lana the hard way, I got caught. She was really mad. I made up a lie about Lex needing to be saved. Lucky for me the idoit did need to be saved. I saw him laying in the middle of one of his tasted laba but I left him there. Stupid ex-best friend's ex-girlfriend stealer.

Entry12: X-ray verison still not working. I remember something about having other superpowers but I don't use them very much so I keep forgetting about them. I love Lana so much

Entry 13: Went to see Jor-El today, he told me he took my x-ray powers away for my own good. Said something about me being a stalker and I'm going to become this superhero and I can't be pinning over the pink princess forever blah blah blah. I miss Lana, I love her so much!

Entry 14: Went to my father grave today told him how bad I messed up and how lana won't talk to me. He showed up and told me to shut up. I miss Lana, I love her so much!

Entry 15: Lois told me to move on, we shared a momnet it was weird.I miss Lana, I love her so much!

Entry16: It turns out it was really M. Fine pretending to be my father. Before Lionel killed him he told me to get over lana even he's sick of it! What is with everyone.I miss Lana, I lovvvvvvve her so much!

Entry 17: Lana Lana Lana Lana Lana Lana. oh I saved someone to day. Lana lana lana lana lana. I use to remember a time I had more then 2 friends. There was this blond haired guy I think, we didn't like each other at first but later became friends maybe? And this black guy, he was short, did say much near the end. I wonder what happened to him. And this other guy, I think he was my best friend, he's the one who stoal my ex-girlfrend from me.

[mortalreckoning]

Originally posted by puddinpiester
mortalreckoning, now if Clark Kent writes that down in his journal, I one of the last holdouts, will finally refer to Clark as the Big Dumb Alien. Heavy sigh.

LMAO...tongue firmly planted in cheek

big dumb alien indeed

Originally posted by LionelLuthor
Nospam, after snapping out of the trance that your avatar induced- I read your post, and what a funny one it is haha

MONDAY: Today I felt like going for a walk with Shelby in the woods- but I couldn't find him any where!! He always seems to disappear for weeks at a time. Any ways, I threw his leash around a cows neck and we had a nice stroll together.
His name's Bernard.

TUESDAY: I ran over to Honduras today, and met up with these girls that I saw on my last trip. Man, they were fun- we made little sculptures of spaceships and everything!!! And I kissed one on the cheek. Take that Lana.

WEDNESDAY: I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror, and decided that I needed a damn good trim! So I jogged over to Lex's mansion and asked him if he knew any good barbers.
He slapped me round the face and called me a slag, and it occured to me "Oh wait, he has no hair." After 5 years I've just noticed that.

THURSDAY: I was knackered from all of my adventures this week. so I just chilled out at home and began watching every season of Friends back to back. Oooh the power of the DVD. I wish I had a bigger TV though, I really should have kept the one that the invisible fella gave me. I love Monica and Chandler.

FRIDAY: I'm still getting through the Friends episodes, I'm only up to 'The one with a chick and a duck'. Boy are they funny GERHOY!
I went to Discount Eddie's in Metropolis (Open all night!) and bought a few bits and pieces. Ran out of room here though, so I dropped off some stuff at the fortress. Bloody hell, Jor El should have at least put some plug points and a satellite dish in there.

SATURDAY: Saved some snotty nosed kid today. What happened was, he'd just learned to tie his own shoes, and couldn't stop showing off. He kept tapping his mum and saying "Look at this. Look at this." So she threw him in front of a car.
I caught him in mid air, but one look at his hot mum sent my heat vision out of control and I ended up singeing his brand new coat.

SUNDAY: Me and Chloe went out to the 'Atlantis' club tonight, because agreed, Chloe needs a night life. She met some guy and went back to his house, but after an X Ray peek at him, I realised he had a small.......brain and wasn't good enough for our Chloe. Wow, I guess I'm starting to get feelings for her.

omigod...
ROFLMFAO

[milton fine]

i think if clark is smart he'll not put anything important in there. like anything to do with his powers or the krypto symbols. but most likely some one will find it ethier lex or lana

and im guessing he will write down his adventures from next season and some one will fined it