Interesting article.. you should all give it a read. it covers everything that happens in toxic fandom and how to counter it.

I really miss the way it used to be, when people were proud of belonging to a community that nobody else knew about. It was happily subversive, separate from canon, and people were free to do what they liked. Nobody got into fights about ships or tried to influence canon. There was an unspoken acceptance that the writers could do what they liked, and fanfic writers and readers could take canon and do whatever we wanted with it.

I remember there would be polls from time to time, such as "Do you really want ____ and ____ to get together in canon or do you want things to stay as they are and we'll write it the way we want, because the show would just mess it up?" The majority wanted the show to stay the show and fanfic writers to be able to conjure whatever kind of relationship they envisioned ___/____ to be.

The problem with trying to force canon to accept a ship is that with canon you will only ever get one version of that ship, and odds are that the majority won't like it because it isn't their own personal vision. That's where keeping it within fanfiction wins every time, as long as we accept that we're all entitled to our own vision.