Lois' Lana-esque reaction to Clark not telling her about Oliver

[melissan02]

Even though I don't think Lois' reaction was berating Clark (i.e. IMO it could have been much worse), I've got to side w/ Clark on this one.
Lois just lost a bit of her cool in this scene...and while I can understand that, she was wrong on this one. It wasn't Clark's position to tell Lois about what Ollie attempted. It's Ollie's and his alone.
I hope Lois comes to terms w/ that notion and apologizes to Clark for his decision in not telling her what happened...or rather, what almost happened.

[xrayvision]

I'm guessing you have never met anyone who have tried to commit suicide.

I haven't, but I would respect their wishes while getting them help by telling a family member and making sure they would get necessary counseling & treatment. Oliver doesn't have family, so with him it's a little harder. I don't know what Clark could have done. He couldn't kidnap him & have him locked up at Watchtower. Clark did his best to make sure there was no bomb on the platform to kill him. The situation isn't as easy as in real life. Plus Oliver hangs out with a bad crowd. If I had a friend like him who wasn't serious about getting help, would I tell someone else so they follow him & face the same trouble? Nope. But I would do something, even if it is to have them temporarily committed to make sure they nor anyone else gets hurt or killed.

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yeah i agree...but I'm just sayin...Ck still wants her to be his girl somehow...why get her caught up in her ex's biz

True.

[morrigan01]

And, for the record, Lois may have been seen to overreact a little because she doesn't know all the details about why Ollie tried to kill himself. And make no mistake about it - he was trying kill himself, not sacrifice himself. Toyman made Ollie confront all the sins about himself and he felt at such a rock-bottom place reading that speech he wanted to just end it all and die. Full stop.

From Lois POV, with only the info she had, all she saw was her friend trying to kill himself and her other friend having kept that info from her. She doesn't know Ollie killed Lex, and she probably doesn't know all the circumstances surrounding how Jimmy got killed and Ollie's involvement with that either. So, IMO, she has a right to be mad ar Clark for not telling her - from her POV.

From Clark's POV, it was a dicey situation all around because he has all the facts about why Ollie tried to kill himself. Telling Lois about why Ollie tired to do it may have lead to having to reveal everything else he knows and why he knows it. Which is understandable IMO that he wouldn't want to do that.

So, neither was fully right or wrong with what they did, but Lois' reaction was hardly a Lana-like one, given what she knows and what she saw Ollie trying to do.

And finally - Ollie tried to commit suicide people. Again, he wasn't doing it to save lives when he stepped of that (fake) pressure plate. He did it because he couldn't live with who he was anymore. Knowing all the fact surrounding why he tried to do it or not, if a close friend of mine tried to kill themselves and another friend told me nothing was wrong with that person but then I found out the opposite was true? That they actually tried to kill themselves? I'd be pissed off too. Any decent person would be.

[thehenry89]

i don't really like how she reacted, but i understand what she's talking about.

[SnowBird]

Clark did what he thought best by keeping Ollie's attempted suicide a secret. Looks like he knew best since as soon as Lois finds out she gets herself in trouble running to find Ollie.

[Ella]

This situation hit real close to home for me. And I can say that it’s not about who is wrong or right it’s just about two people being in the middle of a terrible situation. Two years ago my best friend, Adrian, committed suicide. His sister Beth, also a close friend of mine, had actually heard Adrian say he would kill himself on two different occasions. She didn’t tell anyone. She didn’t tell her parents. She didn’t tell me. A few days after the funeral she mentioned it to me. It was weighing heavily on her mind. I reacted very much like Lois did, and actually quite worse. I was very upset. On the one hand I knew this may be something that could be seen as a personal matter (maybe even a family matter) but on the other hand, I was best friends with Adrian since the second grade. I felt like his family. And even if I wasn’t his family or his best friend, suicide isn’t something you keep a secret. Eventually we reconciled. No one was wrong, I ended up realizing. She didn’t keep this a secret because she wanted to hurt Adrian. She just didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to take something like that. So I understand Clark just like I understood my friend. But I also understand Lois. This is someone she cares about who is in so much pain that he tried to kill himself. When she asks Clark if he knows if something is wrong and he lies to her, she has a right to be upset. It’s an upsetting situation for all parties. Lois wasn’t right. Lois wasn’t wrong. She was just human in that scene.

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Clark did what he thought best by keeping Ollie's attempted suicide a secret. Looks like he knew best since as soon as Lois finds out she gets herself in trouble running to find Ollie.

Oh geez, let's not muddle things up here.

Lois falling into that dangerous game tonight has NOTHING to do with Clark keeping Oliver's attempted suicide a secret. Lois was put in danger tonight because Chloe decided to treat the people around her like pawns in order to get Oliver back into the hero track.

[LadyH]

I haven't, but I would respect their wishes while getting them help by telling a family member and making sure they would get necessary counseling & treatment. Oliver doesn't have family, so with him it's a little harder. I don't know what Clark could have done. He couldn't kidnap him & have him locked up at Watchtower. Clark did his best to make sure there was no bomb on the platform to kill him. The situation isn't as easy as in real life. Plus Oliver hangs out with a bad crowd. If I had a friend like him who wasn't serious about getting help, would I tell someone else so they follow him & face the same trouble? Nope. But I would do something, even if it is to have them temporarily committed to make sure they nor anyone else gets hurt or killed.

Oliver has no family. Lois, Clark & Chloe are the closest he has.

IMO, someone who was in such a bad place as Oliver was, doesn't get to decide who should know about an attempt suicide. I'm not saying Clark should have told everyone, but Lois should have known. Oliver's life was at stake.

Lana wanted to know Clark's secrets for selfish reasons, Lois wanted to know about Oliver's suicide in order to help him. Huge difference.

[Selina]

Lois wasn’t right. Lois wasn’t wrong. She was just human in that scene.

That is basically how I saw it Ella. I put myself in Lois's shows and I think her reaction was justified.

I'm also sorry to hear about your freind.

[ginevrakent]

This situation hit real close to home for me. And I can say that it’s not about who is wrong or right it’s just about two people being in the middle of a terrible situation. Two years ago my best friend, Adrian, committed suicide. His sister Beth, also a close friend of mine, had actually heard Adrian say he would kill himself on two different occasions. She didn’t tell anyone. She didn’t tell her parents. She didn’t tell me. A few days after the funeral she mentioned it to me. It was weighing heavily on her mind. I reacted very much like Lois did, and actually quite worse. I was very upset. On the one hand I knew this may be something that could be seen as a personal matter (maybe even a family matter) but on the other hand, I was best friends with Adrian since the second grade. I felt like his family. And even if I wasn’t his family or his best friend, suicide isn’t something you keep a secret. Eventually we reconciled. No one was wrong, I ended up realizing. She didn’t keep this a secret because she wanted to hurt Adrian. She just didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to take something like that. So I understand Clark just like I understood my friend. But I also understand Lois. This is someone she cares about who is in so much pain that he tried to kill himself. When she asks Clark if he knows if something is wrong and he lies to her, she has a right to be upset. It’s an upsetting situation for all parties. Lois wasn’t right. Lois wasn’t wrong. She was just human in that scene.

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Oh geez, let's not muddle things up here.

Lois falling into that dangerous game tonight has NOTHING to do with Clark keeping Oliver's attempted suicide a secret. Lois was put in danger tonight because Chloe decided to treat the people around her like pawns in order to get Oliver back into the hero track.

QFT. Thank you, Ella.

[thehenry89]

This situation hit real close to home for me. And I can say that it’s not about who is wrong or right it’s just about two people being in the middle of a terrible situation. Two years ago my best friend, Adrian, committed suicide. His sister Beth, also a close friend of mine, had actually heard Adrian say he would kill himself on two different occasions. She didn’t tell anyone. She didn’t tell her parents. She didn’t tell me. A few days after the funeral she mentioned it to me. It was weighing heavily on her mind. I reacted very much like Lois did, and actually quite worse. I was very upset. On the one hand I knew this may be something that could be seen as a personal matter (maybe even a family matter) but on the other hand, I was best friends with Adrian since the second grade. I felt like his family. And even if I wasn’t his family or his best friend, suicide isn’t something you keep a secret. Eventually we reconciled. No one was wrong, I ended up realizing. She didn’t keep this a secret because she wanted to hurt Adrian. She just didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to take something like that. So I understand Clark just like I understood my friend. But I also understand Lois. This is someone she cares about who is in so much pain that he tried to kill himself. When she asks Clark if he knows if something is wrong and he lies to her, she has a right to be upset. It’s an upsetting situation for all parties. Lois wasn’t right. Lois wasn’t wrong. She was just human in that scene.

great post

Oh geez, let's not muddle things up here.

Lois falling into that dangerous game tonight has NOTHING to do with Clark keeping Oliver's attempted suicide a secret. Lois was put in danger tonight because Chloe decided to treat the people around her like pawns in order to get Oliver back into the hero track.

ITA 100%

[xrayvision]

Lois did over react but I found her reasoning justified. Oliver is a close freind who tried to kill himself.

To compare her reaction to Lana is a bit extreame. Lois isn't upset because Clark isn't telling her everything, like Lana was. She had a legitmate reason tonight. Oliver trying to take his life is a big thing.

That said, I do understand why Clark didn't say anything out of respect to Oliver. However I think at times like this, the needs of what one wants doesn't place as much importance. He's clearly not in the right frame of mind and needed help.

I think the term "tried to kill himself" has to be cleared up because that's not what happened at all:

1. Would he try to blow himself up if Toyman never set up a bomb at the party? No.

2. Would he have stepped off the platform if those other people were still in the Ace of Clubs? No.

3. Was he backed into a corner by a maniac who rigged the Ace of Clubs with a bomb which he had no idea when it would detonate? Yes.


So the circumstances were not that of a suicide. The circumstances are those that made him sacrifice himself. There's a big difference between sacrificing himself & committing suicide. The former is an altruistic act done to save the masses at the cost of one's own life. The latter is an act of desperation that occurs without external influence. I don't think I've ever heard someone get coerced/forced into committing suicide by someone else who wants that person dead. That's the main point here. Toyman wanted Oliver dead. If Oliver wanted to truly kill himself, he wouldn't need Toyman's influence whatsoever.

I bring this up because these are the circumstances Lois doesn't know about or wasn't thinking about. Oliver clearly wasn't going to blow himself up if none of these circumstances existed. They were crazy circumstances that don't come around every day.

I know Oliver was still living very reckless even after that. I think Lois knows about the reckless lifestyle, because she commented on him being a mess in Rabid. She can't blame Clark for that. Lois was specifically yelling at Clark for not telling her about what happened at the Ace of Clubs. And what happened at the Ace of Clubs wasn't a suicide attempt, but a would-be act of self sacrifice.

[rebecavaldez]

Aw c'mon. If someone I knew attempted to sacrifice himself, I wouldn't tell anyone else without his consent either. I'd leave it up to them, but help them too. Lois was in no position to help Oliver. He needed a good wakeup call, and neither Clark, nor Lois were able to do that.

Nope, Chloe was! Go Chlollie!!! Chloe/Oliver
But Lois did have a right to be mad. Attempting to commit suicide is no joke.

[Aalliya]

I didn't think Lois pulled a Lana at all... this was completely different than Lana's BS imo

[xrayvision]

Lana wanted to know Clark's secrets for selfish reasons, Lois wanted to know about Oliver's suicide in order to help him. Huge difference.

I wasn't referring to the selfish part. Lana did jump all over Clark & overreacted several times without knowing all the facts. The first time I can think of that was in Hug, where it was regarding Clark & Whitney but no selfishness. Lois did the same thing here, but with different circumstances.

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Nope, Chloe was! Go Chlollie!!! Chloe/Oliver
But Lois did have a right to be mad. Attempting to commit suicide is no joke.

Again, I don't define suicide as something someone else backs you into a corner to do. I know there was that messed up situation with that girl who was coerced to kill herself by someone on the internet, but what Toyman did to Oliver was nothing like that. He brought the weapon that would potentially kill Oliver to the Ace of Clubs, not Ollie.

Oliver wasn't self-motivated prior to or after Echo to kill himself. He was seen living recklessly, but Lois knew about that since Rabid & Savior (before Clark).

[MannaBanana]

Im probably going to get yelled at by a few people for this one, but your all thinking what you would do if you were Lois or Clark.

Well put yourself in Olivers shoes for a second. If you really wanted to kill yourself, I dont think its anybodies business to get involved. Even if it was a moment of weakness like at the Ace Of Clubs, I would have been furious if Clark told people what I did. Thats just my opinion.
Be nice please