The Caper

[oldmankent]

Anytime I have a bit of writers block, starting another story helps.

This is an AU fic. There are no powers or aliens or spaceships or anything remotely related to Smallville and/or Superman as we know it. This is a romantic comedy based on one of my favorite, movies, How To Steal A Million.

There are no bad guys in this story.

As always, feedback and comments are greatly appreciated.


**********

Time: 1968
Place: Paris, France


Cast of Characters

In order of appearance

Lewis Lang: American expatriate living in Paris. Eccentric millionaire and collector of fine art. Owner of the famous ‘Lang Collection’.

Lana Lang: Devoted daughter of Lewis Lang.

Clark Kent: ?

Lex Luthor: American millionaire and obsessed collector of fine art


Chapter One

Lewis Lang stood in front the full length mirror in order to adjust his custom made silk necktie. He moved his fingers toward the knot underneath his white starched collar and decided no adjustment was necessary. The knot was perfect.

”Lewis, you are one handsome man!

Lewis was pleased with himself. He was aging gracefully. A shade over six feet tall and slim, he was still within ten pounds of what he weighed as a GI when he helped liberate Europe twenty four years earlier. Since then he had grown a beard and kept it closely trimmed which gave him a continental air. The beard and his brown hair were now speckled with gray and tiny crows feet were appearing at his temples. But his posture remained ramrod straight and his walk was quick paced. His dark brown eyes still sparkled as he viewed each and every day as a gift to be treasured.

Lewis began his love affair with Paris when he and about a couple of hundred thousand other American GIs had chased out the Nazis in July of 1944. He wasn’t there long when he received word that he was being sent back home to America.

Before that the last time he was home was in November of 1943. After months of intense training in South Carolina he had earned a much needed two week leave. It had taken him a day to make the train trip home to Kansas. Once home it seemed that he and his young wife, Laura, spent the most of the next twelve days in their bedroom with rare but necessary excursions to the kitchen and the bathroom. After a tearful farewell at the train station he made the trip back to South Carolina, was transported by another train to New York City and was then shipped to Great Britain. He was training for the invasion when he received a letter from Laura telling him that he was going to be a daddy. The first half of 1944 was filled with daily letters keeping Lewis up to date on the progress of Laura’s expanding midsection. He had trouble visualizing this since one of his cherished memories was the way he could wrap his large hands and long fingers around his wife’s narrow waist. Like all of the GIs he read and reread the letters until he knew every word by heart. The letters kept on coming right up until June 6th. He read the last one and placed it in the pocket near his heart just before he went over the side of the ship and climbed down the net into the Higgins landing craft that was bobbing up and down in the stormy waters of the English Channel below him.

Lewis and about 500 U.S. Army Rangers climbed up a cliff overlooking Normandy called the Pointe du Hoc on that day. Lewis and less than a quarter of those Rangers climbed back down to safety forty eight hours later. He received his next letter while he was sitting on Utah Beach eating K Rations and drinking a cup of cold, “God awful” tasting, black coffee that a retreating German soldier had left behind. Laura’s back was starting to ache but otherwise everything was okay. Laura along with his parents and her parents were praying for his safe return. Lewis thought for a moment about what he was reading and what he had been through. The woman he loved was safe in Smallville and doing well. The baby conceived out of their love was due in two months and he was still alive and in one piece. At that moment Lewis thought that things just don’t get much better than this.

The invasion got bogged down in the hedge groves of lower France for about six weeks. The hospital ships were full as casualties were obscenely high and progress was being measured in yards rather than miles but Lewis made it through. Then the big breakout came. The Nazis were on the run and surrendering by the thousands. The Allies were on the march and there were more and more of them stepping into Europe with each passing day. In July as he marched through the Arch de Triumph with tens of thousands of Parisians cheering, his daughter was born. But this time he didn’t receive word of the birth in a letter from Laura. Instead he received a telegram from the War Department. The baby was healthy and strong. Laura had died in childbirth. With seven million men under arms the Army didn’t need him. He was being shipped home.

He flew in a Dakota supply plane back across the Channel and caught the next transport ship back to the States. As he watched the land of Henry VIII and Isaac Newton and Shakespeare disappear into the distance he thought of the extreme irony of life.

Lewis Lang being placed right smack in the middle of the worst caldron in history had made it through the war.

Laura Lang living in a land made safe and secure by two vast oceans had not.

At that moment Lewis Lang decided he would never worry again. He decided that all of the worrying in the world couldn’t change fate or destiny or whatever you wanted to call it. So he might as well stop worrying about it.

When he arrived home in Smallville, his mother and mother-in-law met him at the train station. He saw them as he looked out the window of the train. They were a carrying a white blanketed bundle. When he got off the train and got a closer look it took his breath away. Lana Lang was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his life. He gave all the credit to Laura. He couldn’t understand how something so beautiful could have come from him.

Lewis Lang decided right then and there that his daughter would want for nothing. She would be brought up in the finest of society and live in the finest of homes. She would go to the best of schools and live in a world of art and culture and refinement. This was not a world that the farms of Smallville, Kansas could offer her. He decided right and then and there that when the war ended he and Lana would move to Paris.

They settled in a small apartment and Lewis began his unique ‘profession’. It was a profession that he and Laura had begun before the war in Smallville. They had hoped their ‘venture’ would catch on and they would branch out into the major metropolitan centers – New York, Boston, and Chicago. But the war intervened and as things turned out, Paris turned out to be the perfect place for a man of Lewis Lang’s talents. As his bank account increased his surroundings improved. The small apartment became a larger apartment. The larger apartment became a small house and then a small mansion not far from the cultural and political center of the French capital.

One of the benefits of Lewis’ occupation was that he could spend a great deal of time with his beautiful daughter. And in this case the word ‘beautiful’ meant more than a father’s affection. As Lana grew into a young woman she could have easily chosen to become an international model. She already had access to the top designers in Europe, most notably, Givenchy. To Lewis she was a replica of Laura. A petite, shapely figure with a waste as narrow as her mother’s. Dark, silky hair that extended past her shoulders to the middle of back. Soft skin that was without a blemish. Exotic eyes that could capture a man’s heart in a single beat.

But Lana’s beauty was not confined to her physical appearance. Lewis had taught her to be personable and charitable to all, no matter what their station in society. He could never forget that one’s fortunes could change in the blink of an eye. Lana was always available for any benefit. Whether it was sponsored by the elite of society or by a children’s orphanage not far from the cathedral of Notre Dame, Lana Lang would be wherever she was needed.

Lana Lang had attended the best of schools in Paris. She spoke fluent English, French and German. Her father personally supervised her cultural education with trips to Rome, Geneva, and London with timeout for vacations on the Riviera.

Suitors were numerous and frequent at the Lang mansion. Lewis could have easily given his blessing to a number of them. But Lana would have none of them. Paris wondered about the Lang girl but Lewis did not give it a second thought. Life is strange with its twists and turns. He had found love almost thirty years ago. A love that remained in his heart. He was certain that Lana would find her love in her own way and in her own time.

As he was looking in the mirror another strange thought entered his head.

”How odd. I have done a decent day’s work in the last twenty years.”

Lewis turned from the mirror and walked towards the entrance of the assembly room. People in the crowd recognized him, smiled and bowed. A few extended their hands which he took warmly in his own.

”Monsieur Lang!”

Two unformed guards opened the door for him and he entered the room. The crowd inside turned to him and gave him a small but respectful round of applause. In front of the room, the leader of audience spoke.

”Monsieur Lang has entered the room. Of course, he is the owner of the fabulous Lang collection, one of the most prestigious collections of fine art in the civilized world. Today he is auctioning off one of his most prized possessions – this exquisite Cezanne.”

Two well tailored muscle bound men brought a painting into the room. The crowd ‘oohed‘ and ‘aahed’ upon seeing it. The auctioneer continued.

“Our telephone lines are open for our bidders in New York, London and Hong Kong. Let the bidding begin at fifty thousand American dollars.”

In less than a minute the bid had risen to one hundred thousand dollars and not a word had been spoken. The auctioneer took his cues from the subtle body movements of the various bidders in the room. A barely noticeable flick of an index finger, the straightening of a necktie, a wink of the eye, all raised the bid.

Lewis decided to leave the auction. He would hear soon enough by telephone what the final price would be. As he left the room his smile grew wide as he heard the auctioneer say,

”Two hundred thousand dollars. Do I hear two hundred thousand dollars?”


**********

It was mid afternoon and Lana was driving home in her Peugeot when she heard the news on the radio that her father’s painting had been sold. Her eyes opened wide in astonishment when she heard the final amount. – five hundred and fifteen thousand dollars.


“Oh dad! Not again!

She stepped on the accelerator and sped through the city. Grateful that the afternoon rush hour had not yet begun. She drove into her long, semi-circular driveway and exited the car. She ran up the stone stairway into her house. The butler smiled and greeted her. She returned his greeting.

”Marcel, is Papa home?”

In public Lana called her father ‘Papa’ like a well bred French girl. In private, he was a dear old American ‘Dad’. The butler pointed up to the second floor of the mansion and Lana ran up the stairs and into her bedroom.

”Dad! Dad!”

There was no response. She opened the door to what appeared to be a large walk-in closet. She went to the back and pulled back a rack of gowns to expose the wall. She then pulled back a panel that revealed a hidden entrance to another room.

In the room were about dozen paintings in various stages of progress. Lewis was sitting at an easel putting the finishing touches on one of them. His face lit up when he saw Lana.

"Hello, Lana!”

“Hello, dad.”

She bent over and kissed him on both cheeks. Lewis spoke.

”Be careful. I’m covered with paint.”

“And with money.

“Huh?”

“Yes. I heard all about the auction on the radio. Dad, we have to have a long, serous talk.”

“Lana, what a triumph! I could have sold a dozen Cezanne’s on the spot.”

“One’s enough! More than enough! Dad, this has got to stop!”

Lewis stopped as he put the finishing signature on the painting before him.


Vincent

He examined the signature with a magnifying glass and compared it with an image being projected on a screen nearby.

“A perfect Van Gogh!”

“Not again, dad! And so soon!”

“This long, lost masterpiece will not be sold for a very long time. We will hang it and display it. It will be admired. And who knows? Maybe some obsessed tycoon will persuade me to part with it and force me to accept a large sum of money in return.”

Lana grew frustrated. She saw a plate of dirt on a table by her father and she moved to take it. Lewis hastily took it out of her hands.

”Don’t take that! That’s my dirt. It’s not ordinary dirt. It’s Van Gogh dirt from his own neighborhood. I need it to sprinkle over my new painting. I doubt if Van Gogh would have taken the pains that I do with his work.”

“He didn’t have to. He was Van Gogh.”

“But Lana, in his whole lifetime he only sold one painting. While I, in memory of his tragic genius, have already sold two.”

“Dad, I keep telling you. When you sell a fake masterpiece, that is a crime.”

“But I don’t sell it to poor people. I sell it to millionaires and they get great paintings like this one.”

He pointed to the fake Van Gogh. Lana gave up. She looked around the room. Her father spoke.

”By the way, the Lafayette Museum is displaying our Cellini Venus. It will be an exclusive exhibition of one of the greatest works of art the world has ever seen.”

“Not in public, dad! Dad, you can’t do this! The Cellini Venus is a fake!”

“That’s a word we don’t use in this house. Your mother, God rest her soul, spent weeks posing for that sculpture. The woman had the patience of a saint. Day after day she posed for me while I immortalized her image into marble. Of course, it wasn’t all work. Our sessions were frequently interrupted by our lovemaking.”

“I don’t need to hear this.”

As Lewis finished he heard a noise from outside the house. He went to the window and saw a string of police cars followed by an armored truck pulling into the driveway. An expression of glee filled his face like that of a small child.

”Ah! The museum has come for your mother!”


**********

[maitriniazngurl]

I really like the start of this story... it sounds awesome!

lol... the last line was great.

PLEASE UPDATE SOON!!

i can't wait for more!

[kentfamily]

I love Audrey Hepburn. ;):cool::)

[oldmankent]

Long update today.


Chapter Two

Albert Grummond had been President of the Lafayette Museum in Paris for the last twenty years and for the past twenty years he felt that no matter what he did, no mater what exhibit he managed to procure for the museum, he would always come up short to the Louve. That the Louve held the most famous work of art in the history of the world, the Mona Lisa, and not the Lafayette was surely an accident of fate. But Grummond was a proud man and being second best weighed on him like an anchor. But now he had scored a coup. For years art aficionados had begged Lewis Lang to loan his Cellini Venus out for exhibition. The long, lost Venus had not been seen for centuries. By another quirk of fate, the American, Lang, had stumbled upon it and kept close guard over it. As a sculpture, second only in fame to Michelangelo’s Pieta, the Venus could only be seen by invitation to the Lang mansion. It had been rumored that its beauty was exquisite. Hardened veterans of the war were brought to tears upon seeing it. And now Lang had consented to display it and to display it at the Lafayette. Take that, Louve! For an American, this Lang displayed the qualities of a true Frenchman. With this exhibit he would surely be honored in the same manner as his countryman, Jerry Lewis. Lewis Lang would be the first citizen of France. But not before Grummond secured the museum’s possession of the Cellini Venus.

Grummond led the caravan of police cars to the Lang residence. Inside those cars were a small army of police officers to guard this most prized possession. Behind the police cars was an armored van. Inside the van were two heavily armed members of the French Foreign Legion. The caravan entered the driveway of the Lang residence. The policemen exited their vehicles and flanked the house. On the lookout for anyone who entertained thoughts of disrupting this historical exchange.

The armored van opened up and the two guards exited carrying a steel container. The inside of the container was molded to cushion the Venus and to hold it securely. Grummond and the two guards entered the house.


**********

Lana was in a panic.

”Dad, you can’t do this!”

“Oh nonsense, Lana. You worry too much. The museum will display the Venus for several weeks and then return it to us. No one will ever know.”

Lana and Lewis descended the stairs. Grummond was waiting for them. Lewis had never met Grummond but he knew of him and greeted him like an old friend.

”Ah Grummond, how kind of you to come in person.”

Grummond bowed and shook Lewis’ hand at the same time.

”Good evening, Monsieur Lang. It is my pleasure I can assure you.”

Lewis went back to the stairs and took Lana by the hand.

”Allow me to present my daughter, Lana.”

Lana reluctantly shook Grummond’s hand. The butler went into the adjacent room and opened up the display that held the Venus. A display case was opened and special lighting was turned on revealing a marble statue, about a foot in length, of a nude, young woman. The woman was not voluptuous but slim. But her narrow waist caused the curvature of her bust and hips to be much more pronounced. She stood looking upwards with one leg slightly crossed in front of the other with her hands held behind her head. Her long hair was gathered on top of her head. Her face was beautiful and dominated by her full lips and large oval eyes.

Grummond appeared as if he were in a trance as he slowly approached the display.

”C’est magnifique!”

The statue sat on top of a reversed V shaped silver platform. The silver platform sat on top of a flat, square marble slab. Grummond was enthralled.

”Monsieur Lang, this is so much more than a work of art. This is life!”

He regained his composure and spoke to Lewis.

”On behalf of the museum and on behalf of France I thank you for this generous loan and I thank you for never letting this work of art leave the country. Vive le France!”

Lewis picked up the statue and the silver platform with his hands to place the two pieces into the steel container. Lana noticed that he had left behind the marble slab. Sick with worry over what her father was about to do she saw her chance to put an end to the Cellini Venus. As her father and Grummond delicately placed the statue into the foam molding Lana picked the marble slab and nonchalantly held it over the container, wanting to drop it onto and hopefully smash the forgery. At the last second Lewis became alert as to Lana’s intentions and quickly swiped the marble slab from her hands. Both exchanged looks that said, "What the hell are you doing?”

The guards carefully carried the locked container to the armored van. Grummond made his farewell and the caravan left the premises. Lewis poured himself a glass of champagne and remained in the room looking at the now empty display. Lana was incredulous.

”Dad, what have you done?”

He ignored her question and continued looking at the empty space.

”The room doesn’t look the same without it.”

Lana continued to glare at him to such an extent that he decided to answer her question.

”What have I done? I’ve given the world the precious opportunity to study the Cellini Venus.”

“Which is not by Cellini.”

“Labels, labels, labels. It must be some gene in you that is unique to Americans. A gene that causes you to be obsessed with labels and brand names.”

“Don’t you know? You can’t fake sculpture anymore. It’s not like painting.”

He waved her off.

“I know. I know about their ‘so-called’ tests.”

“Dad, it’s not ‘so called’. They are! One quick sniff of a substance called potassium argon and they can tell the age of the stone, where it was quarried, when it was cut, and probably the name and address of the man who sold it!”

Again, Lewis dismissed his daughter’s worries.

”Of course, why do you think I haven’t sold it? I was recently offered a million dollars for it. The basic trouble with you, Lana, is that you’re honest and your inner core of integrity makes you place safety above everything. Have some fun. What you don’t understand is that I’m pleased and proud our statue is a forgery. If it were genuine what would it be? Just a piece of sculpture made centuries ago by some oversexed Italian. So our Cellini Venus is really our own.”

Lana never understood until now that for her father the act of forgery was really just a game. He was playing a childhood prank – on the world.


**********

The caravan made its way down the Chante de Elysis. Policemen and soldiers stopped at the edge of avenue, stood at attention and saluted. The streets lined up with people to catch a glimpse of the van carrying the famed Cellini Venus. The caravan pulled into the museum square. The square contained three main buildings – On one side was the Lafayette Museum. On the other side was the Headquarters of the Paris Police and at the top of the square was the Palace which housed the President of France.


**********

That night Lewis attended the grand opening of the exhibit. Lana couldn’t disguise her feelings regarding her father’s game and chose to remain home. The museum was filled with dignitaries, government officials, diplomats and the who’s who of European society. All of them congratulated Lewis on the extraordinary work of art.

Out of the designer gowned women and the tuxedoed men emerged a lone figure. Tall and slim. His head without a single hair. He stood transfixed at the base the Cellini visit. His eyes saw nothing but the Venus. His ears heard nothing but the beating of his own heart. He mind thought of nothing except, ”I must have it!”

He turned and walked through the crowd as he exited the museum. A limousine and a driver were waiting for him outside. The driver opened the door and he entered the rear of the vehicle.

”Back to the hotel, please.”

He sat back in his seat and picked up the phone from the center console.

"Miss Teshmacher, type this up immediately and send it to all parties concerned.

Cancel all travel arrangements and business meetings Near and Far East. Remaining in Paris on urgent business regarding my art foundation. Further instructions will be issued as needed.

Paris Office, do a rundown on Lewis Lang, this city, all members of his family, his art collection and particularly the Cellini Venus which is now on exhibition. Have all this information at my hotel first thing in the morning.

This is urgent. Repeat urgent.

And confidential."


**********

The tall, dark figure moved past the gate and onto the grounds of the Lang estate. It was a moonless night and he could not be seen. He quickly but carefully made his way up the long driveway to the house. He looked at the windows. Not a light was on. He made his way around the perimeter of the house until he came to a window that was part of the Grand Room. He felt around the outline of the window, searching for wires that would lead to an alarm system. ”How odd. For a private home with so many masterpieces there seems to be a conspicuous lack of security.”

He easily jimmied the handle on the window and gained entrance into the house. The Grand Room was dark. He pulled a small flashlight from his coat pocket and turned it on. He flashed the light on the wall and walked slowly as he inspected each and every painting. ”Cezanne, Monet, Lautrec, Ah!” He had found what he was looking for.

“Van Gogh!”

He stood looking at the painting. He slowly moved the narrow beam from the flashlight across the canvass from left to right. ”Extraordinary!” He took hold of the frame and removed the painting from the wall and leaned it against a nearby chair. He carefully examined every brushstroke. From his pocket he took out a small pair of tweezers and a plastic bag. With the tweezers he carefully took hold of a tiny, barely noticeable piece of paint from the canvass and removed it. He then placed it in the plastic bag and then placed both the bag and the tweezers back into his pocket. He picked up the painting and began to place it back on the wall.


*********

Lana had readied herself for bed. She wore a sheer silk nightgown that hugged her figure and fell to her ankles. Her hair hung haphazardly down her back. She was reading a paperback book – The Birds by Daphne Du Maurier. Her eyes were wide open as her imagination soaked in the story. It was very, very quiet.

There was a noise. ”Or is just my imagination?” She placed the book down and listened carefully. ”There it is again!” Now she was wide awake and her heart pounded in her chest. She tried to control her breathing. She heard the noise again. Her teeth started to chatter.

Lana rose from her bed and turned out the lamp by the side of her bed. She let her eyes adjust to the darkness. She opened the door to her room and went out into the hallway. In her bare feet she walked down the hallway until she reached the staircase. She began to descend down the stairs but stopped when the Great Room came into view. Even though it was dark she could make out the outline of a shadow moving in the room. ”Oh God! Now what do I do?”

She glanced to her left at the wall next to the staircase. On the wall was her father’s display of 17th century swords and pistols. She removed one of the pistols from the wall. She quietly moved down the remainder of the steps until she came to the light switch. She pointed the antique pistol in the direction of the shadow and turned on the light.

One moment the room was in darkness the next moment it was filled with light. The shadow had now become a distinct figure. A man. His back was turned to Lana. He was holding one of the paintings. Lana couldn’t tell if he was removing it from the wall or placing it back on the wall. The man was startled. Lana shouted out.

”Don’t move! Put down that painting!”

He turned around to face her with the painting, holding it in front of him. He held it high and the painting covered half his face. From her vantage point all Lana could see was a full head of jet black hair and a pair of piercing blue green eyes. Lana shouted out again.

”Put it down!”

He couldn’t believe he had been caught. He had been so careful. There wasn’t supposed to be anyone home but here was a young woman, obviously Lang’s daughter, in a nightgown, ”That’s some nightgown.” pointing a gun at him. He slowly lowered the painting and placed it on the floor leaning against the chair. Then he raised his hands above his head. He spoke in a soft but masculine voice.

”Miss Lang, please.”

Lana now had a full view of the intruder. He was very tall. ”Over six feet. Taller than dad.” His face was handsome and his features were chiseled. Lana noticed his clothes. ”What kind of burglar wears a tuxedo?” He was moving towards her. She raised the pistol at him.

”Stay where you are!”

He stopped moving and raised his hands higher. With one hand Lana held the pistol at him and with her other hand she picked up the receiver of the telephone to call the police. Then she noticed the painting leaning against the chair. It was the Van Gogh or rather her father’s Van Gogh. Lana began to wonder if calling the police was the right thing to do.

”Why did you choose that particular painting?”

He looked down at the painting and then looked at petite woman pointing the gun at him. ”Charm. Charm. Use your charm.” He spoke in the same soft but masculine tone of voice.

"It was the handiest. Look. Don’t call the police. Give me another chance. You see. I was only taking one painting and you’ve got so many. Chances are you wouldn’t miss it.
I’ll put it back."

He lowered his hands as if she were no longer pointing the gun at him, took hold of the painting and placed it on the wall. He stepped back, saw that it was crooked and then straightened it out. He stood looking at the painting as if he were standing in a museum.

"There. Oh! It’s beautiful.”

Lana was appalled. The intruder…the burglar had relaxed to where he seemed to act like an invited guest rather than a just caught thief.

”You knew my father and servants were out. How?”

”It’s my business to know things like that.”

He tried to appear nonchalant.

”Look. If I’ve frightened you I’m really terribly sorry. I thought you would be at the opening with your father. A big event like that. Anyway you frightened me so we’re even.”

“Don’t be impudent.”

He now noticed that the gun the young woman was pointing at him wasn’t really a gun but an antique pistol.

”That thing isn’t really loaded, is it?”

Lana noticed that she hadn’t cocked back the hammer on the old firearm. She couldn’t fire the gun even if she wanted to. With both hands she pulled back the hammer so that the pistol was cocked. The intruder winced as she pulled back.

”Of course it is.”

It then occurred to Lana that the intruder might have a gun. Probably something a little more modern than what she was holding.

”Are you armed?”

“What?”

“Do you have a gun?”

“Good God! No!”

He unbuttoned his suit jacket to reveal the inside lining and the shirt he was wearing. Lana couldn’t see a gun but she could see the shirt cling to his well muscled frame. She felt her mouth go dry.

“Well, I’m going to let you go. I don’t know why but….”

Both Lana and the intruder relaxed as she lowered the pistol and carelessly tossed it on the table next to the telephone. The pistol discharged and the sound of the blast filled the room. The sound startled Lana and she began to run back up the stairs. She was halfway up when she regained her composure. She looked back down to the Great Room. The intruder was sitting on the floor. His left hand was on his right arm. Lana came back down the stairs and walked to him. The intruder placed his left hand inside his jacket inside the right arm. He pulled out his hand. In his palm was a smattering of red blood. Lana felt sick in the stomach. Then she felt light in her head. Then she passed out.

He couldn’t believe that she fainted at the sight of ‘his’ blood. He knelt by and looked at her face. ”I didn’t know that Lang’s daughter was this gorgeous.” He tried to bring her back to consciousness by lightly tapping her on the cheek with his hand. Then he flapped his coat at her to bring some air to her face. She opened her large eyes and stared at him. He now seemed to be the one who was incredulous.

”I’m the one who’s bleeding.”

Lana regained her senses. She got on her feet and led the intruder into the kitchen. He sat down at the table and she went to a cabinet to get some Band-Aids, cotton balls, and antiseptic. She noticed that he had taken off his suit jacket and rolled up the sleeve of his shirt. She also noticed that his arm was well muscled and his back was very broad. She came back to the intruder and placed a small bottle of brown colored antiseptic on the table in front of him.

”What’s that?”

“Iodine.”

The intruder whimpered like a small child.

”Will it hurt?”

Lana shook her head in dismay.

”For a burglar you’re not very brave. Are you?”

“I’m a society burglar. I don’t expect people to be rushing about shooting me.”

“Take your hand away so I can put this stuff on.”

The stinging sensation of the iodine caused the intruder to shout.

”Ouch! That hurt.”

“Don’t be a baby. It’s only a flesh wound.”

“It’s my flesh.”

“You have to expect some occupational hazards. You broke in here to steal.”

“Could we keep personalities out of this conversation?”

Lana had finished. It turned out that the bullet can just grazed the skin. The bleeding made it look worse than it really was. It had now stopped bleeding and was covered with a Band-Aid. He flexed his arm

”This could keep me out of action for a week.”

”Temporarily you’ll have to go straight.”

Lana looked at the clock and saw that it was late. The adrenaline rush had disappeared and she felt fatigued.

”Look. It’s late and I’m tired and I have to work in the morning.”

“You work?”

“Some people do. You know.”

Lana started to walk away thinking that the intruder would let himself out of the house. He spoke.

”Fine. I’m going. How will I get home? I can’t drive.”

He placed his left hand over his right arm as if he were in pain. Then he stood up from the chair and pretended to feel faint.

”Oh! I feel weak from shock and loss of blood.”

Lana now felt not only fatigued but frustrated.

”Oh dear heaven. I’ll call you a taxi and pay for it. Is that alright?”

“As far as I’m concerned it’s fine but if the police found my car outside your house it would mean questions. I’m wanted, you know. I’m really thinking of you.”

All Lana wanted to do right now was to end the situation and get to bed. She spoke sarcastically.

”Thank you. Thank you very much. I’ll drive you home. Is that alright with you?”

“Fine. Thank you.”

Lana placed a windbreaker over her nightgown and put a pair of shoes on her feet. She and the intruder left the house, walked down the driveway and went into the street. She saw a Volkswagen parked nearby and assumed it belonged to the burglar. She walked to the car. He walked to the Porsche convertible next to it.

”Pretty. Isn’t she? She’ll do more than 150 miles per hour. Useful for getaways.”

“The robbery business must be pretty good.”

She got inside the car and he handed her the keys.

”It’s stolen.”

“I can’t drive a stolen car!”

“Certainly you can. Four gears forward and one in reverse.”

“This is crazy. You should be in jail and I should be in bed.”

The burglar grabbed his arm again and acted like he was in pain.

”Oh! Oh! Oh!”

Lana acquiesced.

”Alright. Where to?”

“The Ritz.”

“The what?”

“The Hotel Ritz. It’s down the road.”

“I know where it is! You’re a very chic burglar. Aren’t you?”

Lana began driving the Porsche and soon found that she liked the feel of power that the engine provided. She started speeding through the streets of the city.

He grew alarmed as Lang’s daughter put her foot to the gas. She was cutting corners close and zig zagging in and out of what little traffic there was. He found himself swaying with the momentum of the car. At one point he grew alarmed at her driving and reached over with his right arm to grab the steering wheel.

”Your arm is much better.”

He placed his right hand on his upper left arm and feigned pain again.

”Oh no. It hurts.”

“It’s the other arm.”

“The infection is spreading.”

They finally reached the hotel and Lana brought the car to an abrupt stop. The intruder became sarcastic.

"Well, we got here alive. Thank you. If ever I can return the favor.”

”It’s hardly likely to happen, is it?”

Lana got out of the car and gave him his keys. Then it hit her.

”Now how do I get home?”

A large smile came to the intruder’s face.

”You see. You never can tell when you might need a friend.”

The hotel doorman approached the couple

”Good evening, Monsieur Kent.”

Kent greeted the doorman and then made a request.

”I want a taxi.”

“Yes. Monsieur Kent. Right away.”

Lana ears picked up at the name – Kent. Kent noticed this and took her gently by the arm as he led her to the taxi that the doorman had flagged down.

"Oh. Oh. Gave myself away there. Didn’t I? Now you know my name. Oh well, it can’t be helped. I’m Kent. Clark Kent. Besides I have this funny feeling, it’s rare in my profession, that you’re completely trustworthy.

Lana was about to enter the taxi when Clark stopped her.

”Hey. Just one more tiny favor. Like an idiot I forgot to wear gloves on the job and I might have left fingerprints. Be an angel. Before you go to bed just give the frame a little wipe with a clean cloth. Okay?”

Lana now thought that she was in a bad dream.

”Certainly. Anything else? You wouldn’t like a forged passport or some counterfeit money?”

She was answered with a very attractive smile and a twinkle of Kent’s eyes. Lana reacted to the non-answer.

"You’re mad. Utterly mad. I suppose you want to kiss me goodnight?”

Kent drew closer to her.

”I don’t usually do it. Not on the first acquaintance but you’ve been such a good sport.”

He took her in his arms and placed his mouth to hers. Lana brought up her arms to push him away but his strong arms held her tightly. She felt herself weakening as her hands dropped down and fell to her sides. His kiss was tender and Lana began to feel warm. Her eyes instinctively closed and her knees became weak. He ended the kiss just as she found herself wanting more.

Lana’s head was spinning. She was hearing voices but the meaning wasn’t registering. Kent helped her into the taxi. He picked up her feet and moved them into the car. He gave her address to the driver, paid him and then closed the door.


*********

Clark entered the hotel and went up to his suite. He removed his jacket and placed it over a chair. He took the plastic bag from the pocket and walked to the table. He sat down and emptied the small bit of paint onto the table. On the table were a number of small bottles containing fluid with a variety of colors. There was also a microscope. Clark placed the small bit of paint onto a glass slide. He placed the slide underneath the microscope and peered into the glass.

“Hmmm?”


**********

Lana didn’t know how much time had passed before she arrived back at her home. She sat in the car. Finally the driver spoke.

”Mademoiselle, we’re here.”

She left the taxi and went inside her house. The lights were on. Her father had come home from the opening. He was drinking a glass of champagne. He was so pleased with himself that he didn’t notice that his daughter was clothed in a nightgown and a windbreaker.

Ah Lana! What a pity you missed the opening. Our Cellini Venus was a tremendous success.”

“Dad, I caught a burglar.”

“Of course, you did.”

After a sip of the champagne what his daughter just said hit Lewis.

”A burglar? Here? In this house? Good Lord! Tell me all about it.”

Lana began to tell her story.

”Well. It was pitch dark and there he was. Tall, blue-green eyes. Broad shoulders. Well built. Very good looking.”

Lana noticed Lewis looking at her in a strange way. She adjusted her narrative.

"In a brutal, mean way, dad. Terrible man. Arrogant, ruthless. No sense of guilt or shame.”

“So you discussed all that, did you?”

“Well that was later when I was driving him home.”

Lewis almost gagged on his drink. Lana tried to explain.

”I had to, dad. I shot him in the arm with your old pistol. It was an accident.”

“Tell me again.”

“I caught him in the act of stealing. I shot him with your pistol as I was telephoning the police. Then I saw what he was stealing. The Van Gogh. Your Van Gogh!”

“What?”

“I didn’t know what to do. I was afraid if he were arrested it might mean publicity.”

“Publicity? Of course. A police investigation. That might have been awkward.”

“That’s why I let him go.”

Lewis became elated.

”Good!”

“I did right, didn’t I?”

“Of course. Maybe he was a first offender.”

“You should see how he was carrying on as I was dressing his wound. He might have gotten an infection. Oh, the whole thing was awful.”

Lana ended her story. Kissed her father goodnight. She took a handkerchief from her father’s front pocket and moved toward the fake Van Gogh. She carefully wiped down the frame. Then she walked away to go to bed. Lewis could not understand Lana’s behavior. She seemed to be in a daze.

”Lana, this tall, good looking ruffian with blue-green eyes and broad shoulders, he didn’t molest you in any way. Did he?”

Lana thought for a moment, shook her head slightly and answered in a whisper.

”Not much.”


**********

[kentfamily]

Correct spelling would be "Champs de Elysees". The Louvre with an 'r'. Great chapter! Next please. Are you still on a block? Hope you can get back to Encounter.:):):)

[oldmankent]

Chapter Three

Lana went to bed exhausted but woke up after only a few hours of sleep feeling refreshed. Although she did not want to be involved in the hoopla of attending the opening she was curious to see the Venus and the general public’s reaction to her ‘mother’. She showered, dressed quickly in a gray suit with a skirt to her knees and had a small breakfast. Then it was off in the Peugeot to the museum.

Lana parked her car on the street and quickly entered the museum. It was late morning and a crowd was already building up around the Venus.

The Venus was being displayed in the center of the main gallery of the museum. It was placed on a pedestal that was several feet tall. Surrounding it on the floor was a circle of small, blue light bulbs. Above it was a matching set of the same colored light bulbs. Then the entire area was cordoned off by a red velvet rope so that no one could get within ten feet of the statue.

Lana was amazed that the viewers seemed to be enthralled by what they were seeing. ”I wonder how they would react if they knew it was my mother?” She had seen enough. She turned to leave and bumped into a massive chest.

”Sorry. Oh!”

She looked up from the chest into a smiling face that held a pair of piercing blue-green eyes. She thought she had seen the last of Clark Kent and here he was at the museum. He was wearing a tailor-made blue pinstripe suit. His shirt was immaculately white. Around his neck was a red silk tie that was perfectly knotted and he had a matching pocket square in his coat pocket. He greeted her as if they were old friends.

”Good morning. We meet only under the most artistic circumstances.”

Lana didn’t know what to say. If he was wanted by the police than surely he must know that the Lafayette Museum was not the place to be. Especially considering that it was located across the street from police headquarters.

He moved a few feet from Lana and cast his view in the direction of the Venus. Lana noticed that his eyes seemed to be studying it. He whispered underneath his breath.

”Beautiful.”

Lana’s eyes grew wide. ”Oh my God! He’s thinking about stealing my mother!"

”You wouldn’t dare!”

Clark smiled at her.

”Fear nothing. I’m off duty.”

Lana was about to take Clark’s hand and pull him out of the museum when Albert Grummond passed by. He recognized Lana and moved to greet her.

”Mademoiselle Lang, a pleasure to have you here. We missed you last night at the opening.”

Clark stood by not saying anything. He looked at Lana with an amused expression. Waiting to see what she would do next. Lana wanted to leave but finally decided that a hasty retreat would only attract attention. She spoke to Grummond and then to Clark.

”Oh, Mr. Grummond. Mr Grummund is the director of the museum and uh…”

Clark offered his hand to Grummond and the two men shook.

”Kent. Clark Kent. Miss Lang and I are old friends. We used to shoot together. Wonderful exhibition!”

Clark’s interest made Grummond’s face light up. Clark spoke as if he were in awe.

”So many beautiful things…and so valuable.”

Grummond was now thrilled to have an opportunity to display his knowledge. Even if his audience were only two people.

”Oh yes! And observe, please, the security precautions protecting your great sculpture. Are you interested in art, Mr. Kent?”

”Oh yes. And in security.”

Lana couldn’t believe what was happening. The two men started to move closer to the statue. She took hold of Clark’s hand to try and move him away from Grummond and out of the museum. Instead he took hold of Lana’s hand and carried her along with him. Grummond now started to elaborate.

”Oh splendid. Let me show you, please. You see those tiny blue beams.”

He pointed to the circle of blue light bulbs above and below the statue.

”They are infrared circuits.”

Lana interrupted.

”I have to go.”

Clark made Grummond continue.

”Go on. I find it fascinating.”

Grummond had unfastened the red cordon and the trio was now within the inner sanctum of the statue. Clark tried to reach to touch the Venus and Grummond stopped him.

”Be careful. Those beams create a circle around the Venus. Anything that breaks the circle…”

He snapped his fingers.

"….instant alarm. The Electric Eye Alarm System. “

Grummond now turned his attention to Lana.

”I know the question you’re going to ask. What if a burglar got to it and turned off the alarm?”

Lana was trying to stop him from talking and giving Clark information.

”No. It never entered my mind.”

Again, Clark prompted Grummond to continue.

”Funny. I was going to ask that very same question.”

Grummond happily continued.

”Good question. The answer is he cannot. You see, it operates like a door to a vault and only two trusted guards and I know the combination. Now let me show you.”

Lana moved to leave.

"I have an appointment. Goodbye, Monsieur Grummond.”

Clark didn’t move a muscle.

”I can spare a few moments.”

Lana took hold of Clark and yanked him by his arm.

”You’re coming with me, aren’t you.”

Clark let Lana lead him out of the museum. He smiled and waved to Grummond.

”Bye, bye.”

Lana pulled Clark away from the statue, out of the gallery and out of the museum. She walked quickly to her car and got in. She made on last look at Clark.

”Now go away or I’ll call a policeman.”

Clark didn’t know what to make of this beautiful creature. He leaned into the window as she started the car.

”Do you always blow hot and cold like this? Listen. I have something very important to say to you. Now don’t go away….”

Lana didn’t wait. She hit the gas and pulled away from the curb. Clark stood in the middle of the street watching her car disappear into the traffic. A few cars honked at Clark and a policeman blew his whistle and motioned for Clark to get back on the sidewalk. Clark moved next to the policeman and winked his eye.

”She loves me. She just doesn’t know it yet.”

As Clark walked away the policeman murmured underneath his breath.

”Crazy American.”


**********

Clark took his own car across the city and parked across from an office building. He entered the building and took the elevator to a higher level. He stood in front of an office. The title on the door said,


Henri Charles Boyer
Professor of Artistic Authentication
Universite de Paris

Clark knocked and entered. Sitting at a desk was an impeccably dressed older gentleman. The gentleman recognized Clark.

”Well, finally. I tried to reach you last night. I thought you’d been caught.”

“No.”

“What happened?”

“I’m only a part time burglar, Charles. It’s hard work.”

“Did you find the Van Gogh?”

“Easily.”

“And?”

Clark remained silent. Charles’ face lit up at Clark’s hesitation to answer.

”Ah, it disturbs you. Doesn’t it?”

Clark answered forcefully.

”Not a bit. It’s a great Van Gogh.”

“Of course it is. But who painted it?”

“Charles, Lang has a Cellini sculpture exhibition right now that is worth a million dollars. He doesn’t need to forge paintings. Unless you think that’s a forgery too.”

“No. No.”

“Here’s a million dollars lying around loose. Why does he forge paintings? What’s his motive?”

Charles rose from his chair.

”I researched Lang. He came to France almost twenty five years ago. He established himself as an art connoisseur, selling paintings no one had seen in years. He claimed he inherited the money that he used to procure his collection. He’s made millions.”

“So why does he do it now when he has so much to lose?”

“Ego. Vanity. Hoodwinking the whole world and having a wonderful time doing it. Imagine Lang as a young painter. Like many others he copies the masters to learn their secrets. It is his hobby. But over the years it becomes an obsession. He learns every nuance of light, of color, of shade, of form. He identifies with them completely. When he paints a Van Gogh he is Van Gogh.”

“The last time I looked Lang still had two ears.”

“Don’t be, what do you Americans call it – a wise guy. Lang is any master he chooses to be. And that is his motive. And also his profit.”

“What about Lang’s daughter?”

“Lana? What about her?”

“Do you think she’s in it with him?”

“In what? According to you there’s nothing.”

“Huh. Oh yes. That’s right.”

“Well you’re wrong. You’ll see.”


**********

[kentfamily]

Thanks for the update. :):):)

[oldmankent]

Chapter Four

After Lana’s encounter with Clark Kent at the museum she went to have lunch with some friends. It was at her luncheon that her friends introduced to an American millionaire. It was obvious that Lana’s friends were trying to set her up. Lana had become accustomed to such setups and took everything in stride. She was well mannered as always. The bald headed millionaire was quiet and reserved. To Lana, he seemed to have something else on his mind. She engaged him in small talk which he found difficult. She was surprised that as the luncheon ended he invited her to dinner that night. She accepted if for no other reason that the company of another man might assist her in getting her mind off of Clark Kent. ”Dastardly man!” She arrived back at home late in the afternoon and began preparing for her dinner engagement. She decided to wear an aqua colored dress with a matching jacket that extended to just above her waist. The front of the dress was cut enough to stir a man’s imagination but still be considered modest. The skirt hugged her hips and she wrapped a thin black belt around her narrow waist with shoes and a clutch to match. She wore her hair up and was putting on diamond earrings when her father entered her room.

”Marcel tells me you’re dining out.”

“With an American tycoon I met today. He makes computers.”

“Well that might be the basis of an enduring friendship.”

Lana heard the sound of a call pulling up to the front of the house. She looked out the window of her bedroom.

”There he is. Right on the executive button.”

Lewis looked out the window with her.

”Ah, and in an enormous Cadillac. What’s his name?”

“Lex Luthor.”

“Lex Luthor? Are you sure?”

“Do you know him?”

“No. Not personally. But I very much would like to meet him. He’s one of the most open handed art collectors in the whole of America.”

Lana was puzzled.

”He didn’t say a word about a collection.”

“Didn’t he tell you that through an intermediary he acquired the great Toulouse Lautrec from our collection?”

Lana’s forehead began to show lines of worry.

”“Your Lautrec or Lautrec’s Lautrec?”

Lewis seemed to take offense at Lana’s question.

”Mine naturally. Are you implying that my Lautrec is in any way inferior?”

Now Lana was alarmed.

"Listen, dad. He mentioned your name as if it were only vaguely familiar. He not only didn’t say anything about a collection. He said he didn’t like art at all.”

Lana’s eyes grew wide and she took hold of Lewis by his arms.

”He suspects something! He must have arranged to meet me.”

Lewis, not having his daughter’s worrisome nature, did not share her concern. He left the room.

”Well, I find that rather intriguing. I’ll go meet him.”


**********

Lana went to dinner with Lex. He took her to one of the most exclusive restaurants in Paris overlooking the Eiffel Tower. Throughout dinner Lana was extremely attentive to everything Lex was saying, trying to discern the real reason for his invitation. In reality, Lana wanted to go home and read a good book. Lex’s conversation left much to be desired in that it was difficult for him to speak of anything other than business.

From Lex’s point of view he was very aware of Lana’s beauty. What surprised him was her interest in everything he spoke about. She seemed fascinated with everything he did. Asking question after question. For Lex it was a refreshing change from his usual dinner dates of women who spoke of nothing but themselves.

Again, Lana tried to get Lex to talk.

“This is a wonderful wine. How did you know how to choose it?”

“I own a vineyard.”

“It must be fun to own a vineyard. All those grapes.”

“It’s a subsidiary of Eastern Coal and Coke.”

“Eastern Coal and Coke?”

“That’s a subsidiary of Western Wool and Flax.”

Lana moved closer to him.

“Fascinating. What’s your growth factor?”

A smile spread on Lex’s face from ear to ear. He couldn’t contain his delight.

”You’re marvelous. You’re wonderful. Usually I have trouble talking with girls but with you it’s as though you were a member of the board.”

Lana now felt she had Lex feeling comfortable enough that she could get to the real reason for the invitation.

”That’s very nice of you Mr. Luthor. But I just wish I didn’t have this feeling that there’s some subject you’re trying to avoid.”

Lex started to fidget. Lana had obviously pushed the right button.

”There is something. Isn’t there?”

“Yes. I…I hate to say…It has to do with your father and the collection.”

“Oh?”

A determined expression came over Lex’s face.

”Damn it! This is hard for me to say.”

“Monsieur Luthor?”

A waiter had approached the table.

”Yes.”

“Long distance call, Mr. Luthor. The United States. California.”

“How the hell did they track me down here? “

He turned to Lana.

”Please excuse me. I’ll cut it short.”

Lex followed the waiter out of the dining area to the telephones. As Lex disappeared Clark came into the dining area and walked directly to Lana’s table. He smiled to her as she looked up to see him.

"Oh no!"

“That’s not a very cordial greeting. I went to considerable trouble to arrange these few precious moments alone.”

“This is a dinner engagement.”

Without waiting for Lana to ask he sat down beside her. His eyes soaked in her appearance.

”That is a wonderful outfit you’re wearing. Yves Saint Laurant?”

“No. Givenchy”

Lana caught herself.

”I don’t want to talk to you about my clothes. I don’t want to talk to you at all. I want you to leave. What are you doing here?”

“It’s National Crime Prevention Week. Take a burglar to dinner.”

Lana was trying to think of a way to get Clark out of the dining area. She did not want to be obligated to introduce him to Lex Luthor the same way she felt obligated to introduce him to Grummond.

”My escort has a very ugly temper. Now go call off that fake telephone call.”

“There’s something I must tell you.”

Lana was growing frustrated.

”Oh how I’d like to take another shot at you.”

“It’s important.”

“Either you leave this table or I start screaming.”

“I’ll go. Just tell me where and when we can meet.”

Clark placed his hands on hers. Lana was having no part of it and pulled away.

”Choose and make it fast.”

Clark believed Lana would scream. He rose from the table.

”Remember. Clark Kent. Room One Three Six. The Ritz. It’s Urgent.”

Clark left the table and moved out of the room just as Lex was re-entering. As Clark left he shouted in a whispered voice as forcefully as he could without attracting too much attention.

”Ritz! Ritz!”

Lex sat down.

”What was your long distance call about?”

“It was some crazy mix-up. I was connected to a nine year old boy who thought he was speaking to a comic book character. Now where were we?”

“My father and his collection.”

Lex grew very serious.

”Oh yes. I hate to have to tell you this, Miss Lang. I arranged our meeting.”

“Why?”

“It’s this ridiculous obsession. It devours me. From the minute I first laid eyes on it I was lost.
I was helpless. Completely caught up in this awful compulsion.”

“Laid eyes on what?”

“The Cellini Venus, of course. I saw it last night. It haunted me. I can’t think of anything else.
I haven’t slept a wink all night. This morning when I heard your father wouldn’t sell I started pulling strings to meet you. Somehow hoping to find a way to use you to get the Venus.
Well that’s it.”

Lex felt relieved that he had freed his guilty conscience. Lana felt relieved that her father’s forged paintings has still not yet been discovered. Her mood became one of joy. She actually felt sorry for Lex.

”You poor dear, dear man.”

“Don’t spare my feelings.”

“I’m sorry you fell in love with the Venus. She’s not for sale. And believe me if she were mine she’d be on your doorstep in the morning.”

Lana moved over to Lex and gave him a quick peck on his lips.

”That’s your consolation prize.”

“You kissed me.”

“Yes. Well now shall we dance?”

Lex moved to the dance floor with a little voice in the back of his head telling him he had found the girl of his dreams. Lana moved to the dance floor feeling relief for her father.


**********

Lana slept well that night. The Lang collection was safe. The Venus would be exhibited and then returned. But hopefully this little scare would be enough to convince her father to give his terrible habit. She dressed for the day and walked down to the dining area. Lewis was already up and drinking a cup of coffee.

”Dad, I just have to tell you about Lex Luthor. Everything is fine. As far as Lex Luthor is concerned you can go on faking masterpieces as long as you can hold a brush. He cooked up a big plot to meet so that he could get to you through me. That way he can get the Cellini.”

“Really? All this subterfuge to get a statue. He must be quite mad.”

The butler entered the room.

”A gentleman to see you, Sir. On behalf of the director of the Lafayette Museum, Sir.”

“So early? Show him in, Marcel.”

A plain looking middle aged gentleman entered the dining area.

”Sorry to disturb you, sir. Just a technicality on the insurance on the loan of your statue.”

“Insurance? On that? It’s never been insured. It’s priceless.”

“A special policy was taken out on its transport and exhibition but by an unfortunate error your signature was not obtained on the document before the statue was taken from this house. I need to get your signature now. There is, of course, no expense to yourself.”

Lewis was overjoyed at the idea that his statue would be insured without costing him a single franc. The representative from the museum continued.

”Once you sign this document the work of art is covered until it is returned to this house in good order.”

He started reading from the insurance document.

”Insured for one million dollars against all risks including flood, earthquakes, thunderbolts, falling aircraft, fire, rioting, civil war, revolutions, ….and, of course, theft and larceny.”

Lewis took the representatives fountain pen and signed the insurance document in a wide sweep like John Hancock signing the Declaration of Independence.

”Let me sign!”

“Thank you, sir.”

Once completed, the museum representation carefully folded the document, placed it in an envelope and then placed the envelope in his worn leather briefcase.

”By the way, sir. Would you like to be present at the technical examination?”

Both Lewis and Lana answered at the same time.

”Technical examination?”

”Yes. They always require it and you, of course, have just authorized it. A mere formality. I believe they have a Professor Bauer flying in from Zurich. Thank you, sir. Good day.”

The representative left the house. Both Lewis and Lana remained silent for a few moments. Trying to fathom what they had just heard.

”Dad, this professor Bauer. Does he know all the tests?”

“He invented them.”

“We can try and sell the Venus.”

“Lana, at the first breath of suspicion the entire myth of the Lang collection explodes. Boom! Everything I’ve done will be examined and re-examined with X-rays, fluoroscopes, microscopes, shadow graphs, spectrographs, smelly chemicals. We live in a crass commercial world with no faith or trust.”

Lana felt her determination coming to the surface.

”We must keep Professor Bauer from examining the Venus.”

“But how? I’ve just unwittingly given my permission. I’ve not only put my head in the guillotine. I loosened my collar. “

Lewis’ concern then turned to his beloved daughter.

”At least, I can keep you out of this. I want you to leave Paris immediately. Go to South America or the Orient. We have enough money in Swiss Bank Accounts that you will be taken care of for this rest of your life.”

“No.”

“Please, Lana. It will be easier for me. I promise you.”

“I’m not going to leave you and that’s final.”

The butler again entered the dining area.

”Sir, a Senor Paravideo to see you, Sir.”

Lewis did not recognize the name

”Who?”

“A South American gentleman I believe, Sir, and of an excitable nature.”

“I don’t know. Oh my God!”

At that moment another middle aged gentleman entered the room. His hair was dark but graying at the temples. He had a moustache with ends twisted upward.

”Mademoiselle, Monsieur, I must apologize….”

He saw Lewis’ Van Gogh and fell to his knees as if he were worshipping it.

”Ah, here it is. Just as you said. Only better by far. I must apologize. I had an urgent call. A revolution in my country. I must go back to save my money. I couldn’t bear to leave Paris without consulting you about this Van Gogh!”

Lewis was losing control.

”It is not for sale!”

“But you said you might.”

Tears came to Paravideo’s eyes as he continued to stare at the fake Van Gogh.

”I can't bear it! I can see the hand of a master!”

Lewis managed to get Paravideo to leave the house. Cursing on top of his voice that the Van Gogh was not for sale.

”Impossible man. I met him at the auction when my Cezanne fetched a half a million dollars.”

Lewis now began to contemplate his future.

”Oh dear. I hope I can paint in prison.”

Lana kneeled next to him and held her father tightly. She looked in the direction of the Van Gogh and her eyes opened wide.

”Dad, what’s the number of the Hotel Ritz?”


**********

[kentfamily]

I am sitting at the edge of my seat, cant wait for an update. :):):)

[oldmankent]

Chapter Five

Clark Kent was surprised to receive Lana’s call so soon after he had seen her. She said tt was urgent that she see him but she didn’t give any details. ”I guess she’s finally come to her senses and realized that she can’t live without me.” No. She would not meet him in his room. ”She’s playing hard to get.”. Yes. She would meet him that evening in the bar at the hotel. ”Not too hard.”

For her part, Lana couldn’t believe she had been reduced to contacting a known felon. But it couldn’t be helped. ”It must be done quickly and quietly.” In her desire to make herself appear inconspicuous Lana overcompensated and made herself appear even more conspicuous. She somehow thought that she should appear as a femme fatale from an American Noir movie. As opposed to the aqua blue outfit from the previous evening she now was now completely in black. The dress hugged her figure and accentuated its curves. This time she was without a matching jacket and her arms were bare. To top it off she felt the need to hide her face. She kept her hair down to her shoulders but wore a wide brimmed hat tilted to the side and a pair of sunglasses. She arrived at the bar just before the appointed time and took a seat in at a table that had a semi-circular booth for a seat.

Clark took the elevator from his room to the lobby and strolled casually into the bar. He looked for what he thought would be brightly outfitted young woman but did not see her at first glance. He started walking past the tables.

”Pssst.”

He heard the sound. Turned and no one caught his attention. He resumed his walk when he heard the ‘Pssst’ again. He turned. It took a few seconds for his mind to register that the woman in black seated alone at a booth was Lana Lang. He wasn’t quite sure why Lana was dressed in this particular manner but he was eager to find out. He sat at the table moving inward so that he was only a few feet from Lana.

”I didn’t recognize you. You look somehow…different.

Lana didn’t understand what he meant. She shook her head. The waiter came to the table and they both ordered Scotch.

”I was surprised to hear from you. Surprised and pleased Miss..”

Lana interrupted him

”Please, no names.”

“Well, if it’s all that private I’ve got a bottle in my room upstairs.”

“This is a business meeting.”

Clark’s first thought was how on Earth did Lana find out what his real business is? His second thought was why is she speaking so quietly? He said nothing and decided to play along. Lana continued.

”I find I have need of someone of your talents and experience Mister…”

“Please, no names.”

“Are you interested in a big time caper?”

“What?”

“A heist?”

“A heist? Oh. You mean a burglary.”

Clark thought that she couldn’t be serious. He forced an impersonation of Edward G. Robinson in a gangster movie.

”What’s the score, baby?”

Lana didn’t understand why Kent wasn’t taking this seriously. Surely someone in his profession would be interested in the opportunity she was about to present to him.

”It won’t be easy.”

“That’s okay. What’s the job? I’m in.”

“The Lafayette Museum.”

Clark’s eardrums nearly burst and his eyes nearly flew out of his head.

”The Lafayette Museum! I’m out!”

It took a few moments to register with Clark that the woman across from him was deadly serious.

”Why that particular spot?”

“The Cellini Venus.”

“Your Cellini Venus?”

“Well, it’s not mine exactly. It’s sort of in the family. Anyway that should be no concern of yours.”

“You want to steal it?”

“Yes.”

“Why? Is this a publicity stunt?”

“Lord no. It’s very valuable. It’s worth a million dollars.”

“I know. There are also about a million policemen prowling around. That works out to a dollar a policeman. I don’t like the odds.”

“You mean you won’t do it?”

Clark shook his head.

”No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Quite sure. I’m sorry. Thank you for thinking of me.”

Clark couldn’t get over the expression on Lana’s face. She just couldn’t conceal her disappointment that he wouldn’t consent to take on a task that would end up with the best of thieves in jail. He tried to console her.

”Look. Finish your drink.”

She started to leave which was the one thing he didn’t want her to do.

”I have to go.”

He took hold of her hand so that she wouldn’t leave.

”Are you really serious? You’ve seen the way your statue’s protected. The electric eye. The guards.”

“I was hoping to leave those details to you.”

“Yes. Well, I’ll sleep on it and it’s too late now. The museum’s closed. We’ll go around in the morning and look over the premises. What we call in the trade, ‘casing the joint’.

Lana’s mood completely changed. A smile came over her face. She extended her hand to Clark as if she shake on a done deal.

”Thank you.”

Clark tried to change the subject. He moved and continued to move closer to Lana.

”It’s early. Why don’t I show you the real Paris?”

“That’s very kind of you but I’ve lived here just about my entire life.”

“Then why don’t you show me the real Paris?”

“I only have two inches left of this bench.”

Clark stopped his encroachment and gave her more room. Lana’s expression resumed to one of strictly business.

”Where and what time tomorrow?”

”I find that the most successful jobs of this kind are when everyone is relaxed. So let’s meet and have a nice long, cozy lunch.”

Lana was having none of it. She was all business. Clark reluctantly followed suit.

”At the corner of the entrance to the square. 10 am. Right?”

“Right!”

Clark watched as Lana rose from her seat, walked past a line of tables, making male heads turn as she passed, and out of the bar. He shook his head in dismay.

”I must be insane.”


**********

Lana was waiting at the corner of a long avenue. Clark picked her up in his Porsche and they drove slowly down the avenue towards the square with the museum. Lana was outfitted in a spring dress. Clark was wearing a sport coat. Together, they looked like a typical couple out to enjoy a spring day.

On each side of the avenue were dozens of policeman, both on duty and off duty. They were making their way to and from the Police Headquarters located across the street from the museum. Clark pointed out the policemen to Lana.

”Is it those police that worry you so?”

“Yes. And these.”

He pointed in another direction. Lana responded in a matter of fact manner.

”That’s the Ministry of the Interior. It’s always guarded.”

Then he pointed at another group of policemen.

”Them.”

“They don’t have anything to do with us. They’re guarding government buildings. That’s where the President lives.”

“I know and the museum you want to stick up is within walking distance of it.”

He parked the car and they entered the museum through the main entrance.

The Lafayette museum is actually an 18th century palace that was retrofitted with modern conveniences such as indoor plumbing and electricity. As they walked through the entrance Clark noticed that to his right was a reception area with a counter for baggage check. Visitors could not casually stroll through the museum with any type of shopping bag. It had to be checked in as they entered. To his left across from the counter was a large fireplace with a mirror above it. The fireplace hadn’t been used in centuries and its chimney was sealed. However, instead of removing the fireplace itself, the museum hung a thick red velvet curtain in front of it to conceal it. The curtain was about four feet high and six feet in length. In this way the fireplace would be out of view but the mirror above gave a clear view of the room and making the room appear larger than it actually is.

Fanning out from the reception area was a large staircase that swept upwards from both the right and left to the second floor. Walking past the staircase put one into the main gallery. In the center of the main gallery was the Cellini Venus. From the center, one could walk left, right, or forward and go into the other sections of the museum.

Lana followed Clark as he moved around the Venus and then away from it. They went up the staircase to the second floor and had an aerial view of the exhibition. She watched him as his eyes darted from place to place. He did not say a word as his eyes took in everything.

They went back down to the ground floor and walked to the roped off boundary of the statue. Clark put on a pair of dark rimmed eyeglasses and began a closer inspection of the infrared detection system with pretending to be study the statue. Then something caught his eye. He concentrated his view on the head and neck of the statue and then he looked back at Lana.

”Can’t be.”

“What?”

“Well for a moment I thought I saw a resemblance.”

“A resemblance to what?”

“A resemblance to you.”

“That’s silly. It’s at least 400 years old.”

Lana walked away from him and Clark followed.

“Where exactly were you in the early part of the 16th century?”

“I don’t know but that’s not how I was dressed.”

They kept walking along with Clark occasionally looking at the statue and then looking at Lana’s profile.

Clark moved to the fireplace and started examining the entire area by looking at the reflections on the mirror. He noticed that at the bottom of the staircase was a little square room that must have been separately built in more recent years. There was a door to the room. The ceiling of the room slanted with the curvature of the stairs rising above it. One of the museum guards was opening the door and placing a broom in it. Clark noticed that the guard used a key to lock the door and then placed the key on a rack on the outside back wall of the room.

The guard moved away into the crowd and Clark snuck past the cordon and stood next to the room. There were two rows of keys on hooks on the back wall. The key that had just been used was slightly swaying after being placed on the hook. Clark happened to have a tape measure with him. He measure the distance from the floor to the key. Then he measured the distance from key to the door of the closet. Below the rack of keys was a rolled up fire hose and red fire bucket.

Clark then took notice of the guards. They were stationed at various sections throughout the museum. In one section one guard went off duty while another guard replaced him. Clark followed the guard who was leaving. He walked into the main gallery, pass the Venus and through a door that was located in the back of the main gallery.

Clark walked next to the door and began looking at a painting on a wall next to it. He started pointing as if he were showing Lana something. When he was certain he wasn’t being seen, he left Lana and went through the door that the off duty guard had entered. He was now in a separate hallway that was off limits to the public. He saw another door to his left. Being that there were no other doors in the hallway he assumed that this must be where the guard went. ”This must be where the guards stay when they’re not on duty.”. Clark would now attempt something that was very difficult for him. He would try to make his voice sound authoritative and effeminate at the same time.

He opened the door to his left and entered.

The guard who had just gone off duty was removing his museum jacket. Another guard was trying to take a nap on a sofa. Clark entered and slammed the door behind him.

”Who’s in charge here?”

The guard who was trying to take a nap rose to his feet.

”Sir? At your service.”

”Dubois. Special assistant to the undersecretary of the deputy commissioner of tourism. Is this place cleaned regularly?”

Clark didn’t wait for an answer. He held out his arm.

”Look at this sleeve. Look at the dust. Just from brushing against the woodwork.”

“I’m sorry, sir, but we have a complete staff of cleaning women.”

“Once a month I suppose.”

“No sir. Every night from midnight until four a.m.”

While the intimidated guard was speaking Clark moved about the room noticing the various aspects of it. There was a table with several chairs. A refrigerator, a stove for cooking and a sink for washing. There was a row of lockers. On the wall were various warning lights for alarms along with a small vault. In addition to the entrance there was another door at the back of the room. He was now standing by that other door.

Clark brushed off the make believe dust from his arm.

”Well see that they do their jobs properly or I’ll make a report.”

“Yes, sir.”

”Carry on!”

He then moved and quickly opened the unknown door – acting as if he had made a mistake. The door led to a stairway that descended out of the building and to the street. ”This must be where the guards enter and exit the building when the museum is closed” The guard recognized the error.

”Sir, this way.”

The guard pointed Clark back to the real entrance. Clark went out the way he entered and met Lana who was still by the painting he had left her at. He took her by the arm as if they were a couple and then the two of them exited the museum.

Lana was surprised that Clark didn’t immediately go to his car. Instead he started to stroll with her into the sunlit grounds surrounding the museum. He spoke softly and sympathetically to Lana.

”Don’t you think you’re being a little bit over ambitious starting with a million dollar robbery. I mean we have to walk before we can run, you know. I know a little gallery we can knock over just to get our feet wet and then gathering confidence as we go we can move into the big time.”

Lana said nothing. Clark continued.

”No good?”

“No good at all.”

They were now seated on a bench in the gardens outside the gallery.

”Next question. Why must it be this particular work of art?”

“Well, you don’t think I’d steal something that didn’t belong to me. Do you?”

Clark didn’t know what to say. His mind was filled with confusion.

”Why not wait until you get back home and steal it then? No muss. No fuss. A nice clean inside job. I’d be happy to help out.”

“This isn’t a prank or a whim. It’s something I must do because….I must do it.”

“Let’s look at the facts impartially. We can’t get past the alarm. That’s out. We can’t tamper with it. That’s out. We can’t turn it off.”

“That’s out! You’re some burglar, you are!”

Clark just shook his head. He was exasperated. He got up from his seat and began to walk away from Lana. Not abandoning her. Just lost in his own thoughts. She followed him as he walked down the out of the gardens and down the avenue. Then down another avenue. And another. Until he was finally in a park where children were playing and vendors were selling various items of interest. Lana tried to get his attention.

”Is this how you normally work? By the mile?”

Clark pointed to his forehead.

“I’m thinking. Look at my forehead. All winkled. What we need at the right moment is for a member of the museum staff to shut off the alarm system.”

“Could we bribe someone?”

“Excellent idea. No! For one thing we don’t know which guard would….”

Lana was going to pursue the bribery idea but Clark attention was diverted.

A vendor at the park was selling children’s toys. He was demonstrating a type of toy boomerang. Two flat pieces of plywood held together by rubber bands in the center forming a cross. When the vendor held it vertical to the ground at a right angle and threw it, the toy flew about thirty feet, circled around and came back to him. Clark bought two of them and then went to an open area of the park and for the next half hour proceeded to throw it until he was proficient at it. All Lana could do was watch him. Her anger increasing by the minute. When Clark stopped he had an enormous smile on his face.

”Great fun! Try it.”

“If you tell me what you’re doing and why I’ll buy you a cowboy suit and a set of trains.”

Clark grew serious.

”I want you to take a long look at the blue sky, the green grass, the trees and the river because you might not be seeing them for awhile if we end up in a French prison.”

“Do you think you have a plan that might work?”

Clark put his finger to his lips.

”Shhh.”

“You really are the smuggest, most hateful man.”

“If you’re going to become a criminal you can’t be choosy as to who your friends are.”

He started walking out of the park.

”Now where are we going?”

“My apartment.”

“I’d like to remind you, Mr. Kent. Ours is a business relationship.”

“I’m aware of that, Miss Lang. I’m also aware of the social gulf between us. You are an aristocrat and I am a humble burglar.”

They made their way back to Clark’s car. Along the way they stopped at a thrift shop where Clark bought some old work clothes. Lana noticed but didn’t ask why the clothes seemed to be made for a woman rather than a man. She also didn’t ask why Clark bought some old rags, a scrub brush and a plastic bucket. The two of them remained silent until they arrived back at the Ritz Hotel and went up to Clark’s room.

In entering the room Lana was surprised at the luxury of the suite. Clark got down to business.

”Right. There’s the bathroom. Take off your clothes.”

“Are we planning the same sort of crime?”

“It’s safe. It’s dress rehearsal time. That’s why we bought this wonderful junk.”

Clark handed Lana the bag with the clothes. She hesitated but eventually went into the bathroom and closed the door. It was about fifteen minutes before Lana reappeared. When the door opened Lana looked like a haggard peasant with an old wrinkled shirt and a long skirt going down to her ankles. She was visibly upset over wearing such a thing. Clark’s face lit up. ”She’d make a dirty old sheet look good.”

“Oh that’s nice! That’s really nice. It just need one more little touch”

He pulled an old floppy hat out the bag and shoved it onto Lana’s head. Then he made her turnaround several times.

”That’s good. That’s wonderful. That does it.”

“Does what?

“Well for one thing it gives the elite clothing designers of Paris a night off.”

He then made Lana hold the scrub brush and carry the bucket and the rags. He pointed to the floor.

”Down!”

Lana reluctantly got down on her knees.

”Scrub the floor.”

Lana began to slowly move the brush in a circular motion on the floor. Clark continued to issue commands.

”Scrub. Come on. Elbow grease. Scrub!”

“Crime doesn’t pay. Does it?”

“Don’t sulk because at 11:57 all hell will break loose in the museum and at midnight the scrub women come marching in and whatever happens, hold on to your bucket.”

Lana’s face lit up in astonishment.

”You do have a plan! Don’t you?”

“Of course I have.”

Clark sat down on the floor with Lana.

”Now listen very carefully. My plan is – on the night of the crime my plan and I will be curled up in that bed with a good book.”

Lana’s face dropped in disappointment. She softly whispered.

”Why?”

“Why? You ask me why? Well I ask you why? Why are we breaking into a heavily guarded museum to steal a precious statue which belongs to you? Why?”

Lana grew despondent. Tears started to form in her eyes.

”I told you why. I mean I told why I couldn’t tell you why.”

“Not good enough.”

“You’re perfectly right. I mean if I were in your place I’d feel the same way. I’m in this awful trouble but I can’t explain it. I’ll get out of these clothes and leave.”

The tears that had formed in Lana’s eyes were now rolling down her cheeks. Clark took hold of her and then pointed his finger at her.

”Don’t you dare cry!

“I’m not crying. There’s something in my eye.”

“There’s nothing wrong with your eye. You’re crying. You’re trying to soften me up.”

“It’s not true.”

“It won’t work! I’m too tough!”

“I know. I’m going.”

“Hurry up! Go on! Hurry up! Go!”

Clark waved Lana away. She turned to go back into the bathroom trying her best to contain an outburst of tears.

”And meet me at the museum at 5:30 sharp!”

Lana’s face lit up. ”He’s really going to help me!”

“And don’t you dare ask me why!”


**********

[The Black Cat]

Awesome story. PPMS!

[kentfamily]

That was a great chapter. Cant wait to see wait CK does next. Please updtae.

[oldmankent]

Chapter Six

Both Lana Lang and Lex Luthor were in a hurry. After leaving the Ritz Lana went home to prepare for the night ahead. She found that her excursion in the park with Clark had caused her to break a sweat. She changed into a fresh set of clothes, saw that she had a half hour to make it to the museum, grabbed her shopping bag of old clothes and made her way down the stairs from her bedroom. She informed the butler that she would not be home for dinner. She would be out quite late and if anyone should call the butler would not know where she was or how to reach her.

Lex Luthor, being a man of action, had made a quick decision. To Lex it was a decision like every other business decision a man in his position was called upon to make. He carefully examined the pros and cons and then went with his gut instinct. It never failed him before. He was certain it would not fail him now. His limousine took him to the Lang residence.

As Lana opened the front door to leave Lex was about to knock on the front door to enter.

Lana didn’t know what to say but she politely smiled.

”What a nice surprise. I’m just rushing out.”

Lex took Lana by the hand and took her back in the house with him.

”Out? Oh no. I’m all rehearsed. Made up and ready to go on. Luckily it’s only a short speech.”

“I really must fly. I have an appointment. Business.”

“Business, business. That’s probably all you ever think of.”

Lana momentarily acquiesced.

“Well, just a minute. A second really.”

“You’re in a rush? You want action? Fine. That’s my mood too. Here. Catch.”

He tossed to Lana a small jewelry box. She opened it and was blinded by an enormous multi-carat diamond ring. Her head was spinning. ”I don’t have time for this. I have to get to the museum.”

“Why?”

“Why? That’s the silliest question I’ve ever heard.”

“But why? I mean we don’t even know each other. Oh please come back tomorrow.”

“Nope. Made up my mind. Man of action. Snap judgment. Bought a whole fleet of tankers that way once. One of the best deals I ever made.”

“But I’m not a fleet of tankers and I’m not getting engaged to a man I barely know.”

“You’ll get to know me. Look me up in Who’s Who, Dun and Bradstreet. There.”

He placed the ring on her finger.

”It’s a deal?”

“Yes. No! I’m just a little dizzy and this thing is blinding me. I really have to run.”

It seemed that there was only one thing Lana could do to get back on schedule. Lex was smiling from ear to ear.

”Now relax. I’ve never been engaged to such a fidgety girl in all my life. Oh. The kiss.”

He took Lana in his arms, bent her over and kissed her. Lana brought her arm up behind his head and saw on her wristwatch that she only had twenty minutes to make it to the museum.


**********

Clark had also changed his clothes. He was now in a dark charcoal suit and wearing a dark overcoat. It was just a short trip to the museum and he arrived about a half hour before the scheduled time. He began to pace up and down the driveway leading to the entrance of the museum. He began having a conversation with himself. ”I’m nervous. Why am I so nervous? Because I’m about to commit a major crime. Is that why you’re really nervous? Why else would I be nervous? Don’t you know?”

He looked at his watch. Twenty minutes to go. ”So do you think your plan will work? The odds are against it. Than why are you doing it? I really have nothing better to do than to sit in a jail cell for the next ten years.”

Ten minutes to go. ”Heaven forbid she should be early. You still didn’t answer the question. What question? Why are you doing this? Go away, you pest!”

Five thirty. ”Typical woman. Never on time. Maybe she’s the smart one. Maybe she’s given it up. Maybe she’s given you up.”

Five thirty five. ”Late. Five minutes late isn’t late for woman. Is it?”

A taxi pulled up and Lana quickly exited the car. She ran up to Clark. He couldn’t disguise his anxiety.

”Where have you been?”

“I was getting engaged.”

Clark stood motionless over the shock of what he had just heard. Lana rushed towards the entrance.

”Come on. This fellow turned up just as I was leaving. He wants to marry me. I didn’t want to keep you waiting so I got engaged to him. Is it alright? Am I on time?”

Clark was trying to make sense out of what he was hearing.

”Oh fine. We have about ten more minutes so if you’d like to go back and marry him.”

Lana took Clark by the arm and pulled him towards the entrance.

”Come on.”

They entered the museum and the guard standing at the entrance asked Lana to check her bag at the reception area. She looked at Clark at he nodded his consent as if he had already anticipated the request. They walked a short distance and were standing at place halfway between the fireplace with the curtain in front of it and the closet underneath the stairway. There was a guard not far from them standing near the fireplace. Clark whispered to Lana.

”Go to the guard and divert his attention so that he doesn’t see me over here.”

“How do I do that?”

“Ask him something”

“What should I ask him?”

“I don’t know. Ask him the direction of the ladies room.”

“But I don’t have to go to the ladies room.”

Clark gave Lana an exasperated look and she did as she was told. She walked up to the guard and placed herself at his right so that he would not look to his left and towards Clark. Clark moved towards the closet, took the key from the rack on the back wall, unlocked the door to the closet, left it slightly ajar and then walked back to where he was. When he returned Lana left the guard and rejoined him.

”Just checking on the accommodations.”

They walked into the main gallery where the Venus was located. Lana noticed that Clark was looking at the statue and then checking her profile.

”Not again.’

“I could swear.”

They moved past the Venus and were now strolling along the walls. Clark was pretending to be looking at each and every painting.

”Well we have a few moments for cultural improvement.”

“How do we get past the alarm?”

“I’m depending on normal human reactions.”

Clark was standing in front of a painting. A guard was posted next to it. Clark looked at the painting and then spoke to the guard.

”“Blue period?”

The guard shrugged his shoulders. Clark continued his commentary as he and Lana walked.

”Regard the subtle harmony of color. Now the nice thing about complicated mechanical devices is that they do suddenly go haywire.”

“Yes? What’s with the haywire?”

“People in charge have a tendency to panic and to run around in confused circles and at that moment we strike.”

Clark stopped at painting and examined it.

”Superb Rembrandt. Now this is, to coin a phrase, the point of no return.”

He looked at his watch.

”In precisely one minute the closing bell will ring. We can leave with the others and have a quiet dinner or we stay. Then we’re committed to go through with it. Do you really want it that much?”

”More!”

Clark was momentarily taken aback by Lana’s enthusiastic response.

”Okay. You’re the boss. Just do as I tell you.”

Clark looked at his wristwatch.

”Stand by for the countdown. Six…five…four…three…two…one…NOW!”

The museum bell rang. The crowd started slowly moving towards the exit. Clark and Lana moved with them until they were in the reception area by the fireplace and the mirror. A guard was nearby. Another guard had a trash container and was picking up pieces of litter from the floor. Clark needed to divert the attention of the guard standing by the mirror. He found a museum program. He placed it on a nearby table, took some loose change from his pocket and placed it between the pages of the program so it could not be seen. Then he left it on the table to be found by the guard with the trash container.

”Watch for normal human reactions.”

The guard picked up the program and as he did so the change flew out from between the pages onto the floor. The guard moved to pick up the change as did some of the patrons and the other guard standing by the mirror. With the attention of the guards diverted Clark took Lana’s hand and ducked into the fireplace. Hidden by the curtain in front of it.

The museum emptied. The guards locked the entrance and the patrolled through the empty galleries before retiring to the guards’ room. The lights were dimmed. Around the Cellini Venus the blue infrared bulbs burned bright.

Quiet.

Clark and Lana emerged from the fireplace. He led her into the closet and then closed the door behind them, leaving it slightly ajar.

It was dark. Lana couldn’t see but knew there wasn’t much space. She could feel Clark’s thighs unintentionally pushing her from behind. Clark took a small flashlight from his coat and turned it on. A small beam of light relieved some of the darkness. He moved the beam around the closet. It was filled with cleaning materials. He looked at the floor. The beam showed Lana’s shapely legs emerging from her skirt. A smile came to Clark’s face. Then he moved the beam to Lana’s face.

”Comfy?”

“I hadn’t counted on there being quite so much togetherness.”

“Well it’s the height of the tourist season. Everything was booked up. This is the best I could do.”

Clark found a light switch with activated a small, naked bulb in the corner of the closet. Lana tried to make herself comfortable….without success. She spoke to Clark without looking at him.

”Now what?”

“We wait.”


**********

Claude Lammond hated art. He hated his job. He hated the people he worked for and he hated the people he worked with. He had lost count of the years he had worked for the museum. Every night it was the same thing. Coming to this place. Spending fifty eight minutes in the room. Leaving the room to make a patrol of the empty museum that took a total of two minutes to complete and then coming back to the room and doing the whole thing all over again. Every hour on the hour for the next ten hours.

Claude was the lead guard. He looked at the men he was responsible for. One was taking a nap. A few were reading. Some were playing cards. Then there was Louis. Louis was eating. Louis was always eating. Louis was rotund to say the least. All he ever thought of was eating and drinking. Although wine was prohibited during working hours Claude knew that Louis had secretly deposited several bottles of wine throughout the museum so that he could have a swig on his hourly round. Claude looked at Louis as Louis was shoving a forkful of noodles into his mouth.

”Louis, is food all you ever think about?”

“No. I think of wine too.”

Claude looked at the clock on the wall.

”Alright boys, it’s time.”


**********

Lana’s eyelids were drifting downward when she heard a noise. In the empty museum the slightest of sounds were amplified throughout the cavernous galleries. Doors were being opened and shut. Heavy footsteps were walking on the tiles. The sounds of footsteps on the step of the stairway above them thundered in the small closet. Lana wanted to say something but Clark held his finger across his lips. He turned out the small light. They were in the dark. In the darkness Lana’s sense of hearing became even more acute. There was someone near the closet. She could hear someone swallowing. No. It was more of a gulping. Their throat bobbing up and down. Something was being placed in the fire bucket. Footsteps to the door. Someone was standing in front of the door. A belch. Lana heard the door being pushed. The latch took hold. ”We’re locked in! The footsteps moved away. Doors opened and closed.

Silence.

Clark turned on the light. Lana’s voice was panicky.

”He locked the door. He locked us in!”

“It’s challenging I admit but that makes it more interesting.”

“I’m going to faint.”

“Don’t. There’s no room.”

Clark looked at his watch.

”Two minutes past eight on the nose. Now we have a fix as to when they make their rounds. Every hour.”

“We’re still locked in. How about that, mastermind?”

Clark pulled out a stick of chalk and a tape measure from inside his coat. He measured a distance both vertically and horizontally on the back wall and marked an X where the lines intersected. He placed the items back in his pocket and then pulled out a large magnet. He placed the magnet at the X and started to turn it. Lana could hear something scrapping on the outside of the wall. ”The key! Clark moved the magnet along the inside of the wall and the scrapping continued on the outside of the wall. He was at the door and moved downward. He was now at the small crack of space between the floor and the bottom of the door. The key flew through the crack onto the magnet. Lana looked at Clark in amazement.

”Brilliant!”

Clark brought the key up to the lock but instead of a full keyhole he found only a small circular hole. The back of the keyhole in the front of the door. Lana’s sense of euphoria came crashing to the ground.

”It doesn’t open from inside!”

Once again Clark’s hand went inside his coat.

”However by a strange coincidence I just happen to have….”

He pulled out a long, thin tube-like length of string about the size of a drinking straw and a length of wire. The string had a hollow metal end. He poked the metal end through the small hole in the door until he heard the metal end hit the floor outside the door. He extended the wire and hooked it at the end. Then he snaked the wire through the crack of space between the floor and the bottom of the door. Then he fished for a few seconds until he caught the end of the string with the wire and pulled it through the crack. Now having the hollow metal end of the string back inside the closet he placed the front point of the key inside the hollow end. Once again Clark’s hand went in his pocket. This time he pulled out a pair of needle nose pliers. He clamped down on the metal end of the string until it was secure around the point of the key. Then he pulled on the length of string that was inside the door, pulling the key back through the crack to the outside of the door, up the door and into the keyhole. He yanked the string off the key. The point of the key now protruded through the small hole inside the door. The key was in the lock. With the needle nose pliers he took hold of the point and turned the key.

The door opened.

”No applause, please. Wait till you see what I do for an encore.”

Hand again in his coat. He pulled out a roll of black electrical tape, tore off a short length and placed it over the latch of the door so that it would not lock again. Then he placed the key back on the rack. Lana was grateful for the open space. She inhaled deeply and took in the fresh air. Clark walked to the reception area to the baggage check and saw several bags that were left behind. He took hold of the bag Lana had carried into the museum. He came back to the closet and closed the door behind him. He pulled out of the bag the clothes he had bought earlier in the day and handed them to Lana.

”Put those on.”

Lana reached around and started to pull the zipper down the back of her dress.

”Turn around.”

“What for? They go on over the clothes.”

Lana was relieved that she didn’t have strip in front of Clark. Although the idea seemed less objectionable now than it would have several hours ago. She draped the old clothes over her expensive designer clothes and looked up at Clark.

”Congratulations. You look terrible.”

“Can we steal that statue soon? I hate to complain but…”

“Have patience. We will.”

“When? And how?”

“Now look. If you were a guard and had to sit night after night guarding a bunch of junk you couldn’t afford and didn’t particular like how would you feel?”

“Irritable.”

“Ah ha.”

Clark’s hand went up his sleeve and pulled out two strips of plywood. He crisscrossed them and bonded them together with a rubber band, making the boomerang he had bought at the park. Lana sighed in exasperation.

”Oh no.”

“It’s psychological warfare.”

“With that?”

Clark opened the door and moved outside the closet. He was within sight of the Venus. He aimed the boomerang to just above the head of the statue and threw it. It didn’t quite reach the statue but circled around and came back to him. Clark aimed again and this time he threw the toy with just a little more force.


**********

Claude was feeling nauseated at watching Louis eat. He bolted upright as the alarm sounded off and its sound pierced the silence of the museum. Everyone in the room was in shock. For a moment no one knew what to do. Then everyone grabbed their jackets and ran out the door and into the galleries.

The Venus was undisturbed. The blue bulbs glowed brightly. The guards fanned out into the museum. Running up the stairs and throughout every gallery. Claude could now hear the police sirens outside the building. The rhythmic sound that is unique to European police cars. He turned the lights to full illumination and went to the front door. It was locked and like the Venus, undisturbed. He unlocked it and a dozen policemen entered the building. Then Claude realized that the alarm was still sounding off. He ran back to the guards’ room. He pulled out his wallet and from his wallet he pulled out a slip of paper. The paper contained a set of numbers. He spun the numbers around the combination lock on the door of the small vault in the wall. The door opened. Inside were several electrical buttons. He pushed one and the alarm shut down. Then he pressed the reset button and closed the vault door. He walked back into the gallery.

One by one the guards reported to him.

”Everything is in order.”

“Nothing is missing.”

“I checked. It isn’t a short circuit.”

Claude took off his hat and wiped his brow. ”A burglar alarm especially designed to give me heartburn.”

The police had found nothing. They were now leaving. Claude relocked the entrance. The lights were dimmed. Everyone went back to the guards’ room. The phone was ringing. Claude picked it up.

”Lafayette Museum. Senior guard speaking. Yes, Sir. I’m sorry that Madam and the Minister were disturbed. Yes. The alarm went off but everything is alright. No. Nothing is missing. No. We don’t know what caused the alarm to go off. I am very sorry for the disturbance.”

All of the guards were looking at him.

”That was the Perfect of Police. The alarm woke up the Minister of the Interior.”


**********

Lana had never been so scared in her life as when the alarm went off. Her heart pounded in her chest. Clark came running back into the closet and shut the door behind him. The lights were turned off and they were in darkness. Mixing in with the screeching sound of the alarm were the heavy footsteps. This time they were running. Up the stairs. Down the stairs. Everywhere in the museum. Then she heard the police sirens and her mouth went dry. Lana was shaking with fright. She leaned into Clark’s chest and leaned her head against it. She felt his chin above the top of her head. His arms wrapped around her. Her breathing started to slow down. The alarm was shut off. The running changed to walking. Then everything quieted down. The back door leading to the guards’ room opened and closed.

Silence.

The light inside the closet was turned on. Lana looked up into Clark’s blue-green eyes.

”I’m so scared. My hearts thumping. I just feel terrible.”

“Well I’d send for a doctor but I honestly don’t think he can fit in a closet.”

For the first time since she thought of stealing the Venus the gravity of what she was doing hit Lana. Not only could she end up in a great deal of trouble but she had pulled another person into it with her.

“I’m so scared for you too. I’ve no right to involve you in this. If you want to call it off..”

“Well, that’s a kind thought and I appreciate it but then what about Professor Bauer?”

Lana’s mouth dropped.

”What happens tomorrow when he turns up to test your million dollar baby?

Lana didn’t know what to say. Clark was looking directly into her eyes.

”It’s a fake. Isn’t it?”

“I…”

“No long and involved stories this time of night. Just nod your head, yes or no.”

Lana swallowed and nodded her head.

”Who carved it?”

“My father.”

“Who posed for it?”

“My mother. You’re the first one to notice the resemblance.”

“I’m very sensitive and perceptive.”

“How long have you know about her?”

“Since you first asked me to steal it.”

Lana didn’t understand.

”But if you knew the thing was worthless, why did you…”

Lana felt Clark’s lips softly caress her own. She was startled at first but then she closed her eyes as she was overcome by a stronger emotion. She liked it. More than liked it and she didn’t want it to stop. She opened her eyes and looked at him. For some strange reason his eyes seemed to be brighter, his face handsomer, his touch more tender. The cramped closet with the extreme lack of personal space was no longer a curse but a blessing. The forced closeness between her and Clark was no longer viewed as a necessary burden but as a welcomed luxury. Lana grew warm and felt her heartbeat quicken but unlike a few minutes earlier, this time it wasn’t from fright. Instead she never felt safer. ”Why? That’s why. I’m so stupid.”

Lana threw her arms up and around Clark’s neck and pulled him towards her.

”Explain it to me again.”


**********

[The Black Cat]

Very good chapter. PPMS!

[kentfamily]

Please update. :):):)

[oldmankent]

Chapter Seven

Clark almost forgot why he was in the closet in the first place. ”This wasn’t supposed to happen. I mean it wasn’t supposed to happen this way. Not in a closet. Oh God! She tastes good!” His reservations melted away as Lana returned his kiss with her own brand of tenderness and molded her lithe body into him. Just as Lana’s senses had become heightened by the confines of the closet Clark was now aware of a great many things. Lana’s hair was lush, long and soft against his cheek. She closed her eyes just as she met his mouth and her long eyelashes fluttered for just a second. Her hand was at the back of his neck playing with his hair. His arm as if having a life of its own wrapped itself around her waist and drew her closer. ”It’s so small.” There was a part of him that wanted to devour her like a hungry animal but there was another, far stronger part that told him to savor everything about Lana Lang the same way he would savor one of the masterpieces just outside the door of the closet. The moistness of her lips. The softness of her skin. The scent of her hair. Clark had come to the conclusion that Lana Lang was a living, breathing work of art. ”I’m really falling hard.”

Lana didn’t know how much time had passed. She really didn’t care how much time had passed. All she knew what that she was very comfortable right where she was – on Clark’s lap. She stretched out her arms.

”It’s funny how roomy it’s suddenly become in here.”

“We’re adjusting to our environment.”

“Hmmm.”

She brought her lips to Clark’s and brought her hand up behind his head. He flinched as her diamond ring scratched the back of his neck.

”I’m sorry. It’s my engagement ring. I forgot about it.”

“So did I. Congratulations. May I kiss the bride?”

“Hmmm.”

They lingered on each others lips.

”For one thing, who’s bride am I kissing?”

“Some American millionaire named Luthor Lex or is it Lex Luthor? I’m not quite sure.”

“Well, they’re lucky fellows. Both of them. Which one are you going to marry?”

“Neither. I’m afraid you’ll just have to do.”

Clark was surprised at Lana’s forwardness. Surprised and pleased.

”I can’t afford a ring like that. Although I’m sure I could find something like it in my line of work. Depending on the neighborhood I happen to be casing.”

Lana began to nibble on Clark’s earlobe.

”I think it’s time for you to make a career change.”

Clark felt his eyes rolling up into his head.

”I’ll start looking at the Help Wanted ads tomorrow.”

He moved his head so that his mouth met hers. They lingered for a few moments. Then Clark brought his wristwatch into view.

”Second round coming up.”

He pressed the tip of his finger against Lana’s lower lip.

”Just marking my place.”

He opened the door of the closet and they exited. They walked just a few paces so that the Venus was within view. Clark pulled his right arm back and threw the boomerang. It headed to a spot above the head of the statue. It crossed the infrared beam and triggered the alarm. Then it circled back and was in Clark’s hands in a second. Clark and Lana ran into the closet as the alarm blared throughout the empty museum and shut the door behind them. This time they held tightly to each other. Not frightened but amused as two children playing an enormous prank.

The guards ran into the gallery and once again found the Venus in its place and the blue bulbs intact. Louis, who by now was feeling just a wee bit tipsy from his hidden stash of wine, looked at the statue and laughed. Claude gave him a burning looking which said ‘this isn’t funny’. The guards dispersed into the galleries.

Lana heard the same sounds that she did the first time but this time the sounds brought a smile to her face. It was one thing partnering with someone to commit a crime. It was quite another thing to partner with someone who was in love with you to commit a crime. She was filled with a confidence that told her that Clark Kent, no matter what his profession, would never let anything happen to her and she decided right then and there that she would never let anything happen to him.

She could hear the police sirens outside the building. Pairs of feet were running up and down the stairways. She held tightly onto Clark. He raised his voice so she could hear.

”Pretty soon someone is going to get awfully tired of this racket.”

She replied by pulling his head and his lips towards hers. When they separated she giggled.

”Normal human reaction.”

The pace of the footsteps slowed down. The alarm was turned off.

Silence.


**********

Claude was back in the guards’ room. The slip of paper was out of his wallet. He was spinning the combination on the vault. He opened the door and shut off the alarm. Just as he finished pressing the RESET button the phone was ringing. Claude left the vault door open and answered the phone.

”Lafayette Museum. Senior guard speaking.”

A voice barked on the other end of the line and Claude bolted upright to attention. His voice quivered as he answered.

”At your service, Monsieur President. Yes, Sir. I know it makes a terrible noise. It was installed for just that purpose. No, Sir. No. I did not install it. Yes, Monsieur President. I know it is the second time tonight. Yes, Sir. It will be rectified right away. Good night, Monsieur President.”

Claude felt his intestines loosening up. He had to run to that bathroom but there was something he had to do first. The rest of the guards were coming back into the room and he walked back to the vault. He stared at the ON/OFF switch. Then he started to scream at the alarm.

”I don’t make enough money for all of the trouble you have caused me! You technological piece of garbage! I hate you!”

He turned the switch to OFF and slammed the door shut. Then he ran into the bathroom.


**********

Clark waited a few minutes after the quiet was restored. He slightly opened the door and peaked out at the Venus. One moment the blue infrared lights were burning brightly. The next moment they were extinguished. He withdrew his head back into the closet not quite believing what he had just seen.

”Clark, what’s wrong?”

“It worked. They actually turned it off.”

It took hold of Lana by her arms.

”It worked!”

“Well, didn’t you expect it to?”

He shook his head ‘no’ but ‘yes’ came out of his mouth.

”Clark! You’re a genius!”

Clark regained his composure and then gave Lana the cleaning supplies.

”Wait until the moment of maximum confusion and then start scrubbing like mad in the direction of the guards’ room.”

“The guards’ room?”

“That’s right.”

“But the guards”

“When they see that the Venus is gone there will be guards everywhere except the guards’ room.”

Lana nodded her head in understanding. They were about to leave the closet when Lana stopped.

”Lana, what’s wrong?”

She smiled at Clark.

”Nothing. I just wanted to remember this place.”

They left the closet. Clark told hold of the fire bucket and handed it to Lana.

”Hang on to your bucket.”

As Clark handed Lana the bucket he noticed that there was something inside it. He pulled out a half empty bottle of wine. He walked with the bottle towards the statue. He stood in front of it for a moment questioning whether or not he should take hold of it. He extended his arm and reached and took the statue into his hand.

Silence.

He breathed a sigh of relief and then replaced the Venue with the bottle of wine. He walked back to Lana, took one of her wash rags and wrapped the statue in it. Then he placed everything in her bucket.

”Now back into the fireplace with you until the cleaning women come.”

Lana was about to follow his instructions when she was pulled back. He placed a soft kiss on her lips.

”I love you.”

“I love you too.”

As she began to walk she noticed that Clark was carrying another set of clothes for himself. A captain cap and a dark jacket. Almost the same as the guards. She ducked into the fireplace and had a few minutes alone with just her thoughts. ”When I have children and they ask me how their father and I met? What am I going to tell them?


**********

Lana didn’t have to wait long. Shortly before midnight the museum lights were turned on and she heard the chatter of women. About a dozen women entered the building. Each of them was wearing old work clothes and a hat or a kerchief to keep their hair in place. They looked elderly but it was impossible to tell their age since a lifetime of manual labor had taken its toll. They were carrying buckets, brushes, mops and dusters. They dispersed throughout the museum. Some worked in pairs but the most part the majority of them worked alone. Some dusted the frames of the paintings. Others sprayed glass cleaner on the assorted mirrors throughout the galleries. Finally, there were women who got down on their knees and scrubbed the floor. Lana would be one of these.

Lana moved out of the fireplace on her knees moving her dry scrub brush in small circles on the floor. She crawled backwards keeping the brush and the bucket in front of her. The Venus was wrapped and looked like just another dirty rag in the bucket. Lana made sure she kept apart from the other women and kept her head down so that no one could see her face. If any of the women did see her face they would immediately know that something was wrong. For one thing they would know that she was a stranger. For another thing they would know that someone as beautiful as Lana Lang would never be found on her knees scrubbing a floor.

She kept moving backwards towards the guards’ room.

At midnight the guards left their room and began to make their rounds. After the mad rush of the two false alarms the guards were in no mood for a serious surveillance. They casually strolled throughout the museum and among the cleaning women. Barely looking at the exhibits. A few of them struck up conversations with the women, telling them of the events of the night.

Louis, as usual was the last guard to leave the room. His immediate thought was to find his bottle of wine. He strolled past the Venus display on his way to the fire bucket by the closet underneath the stairway. As he passed the empty display he did a double take. ”Oh my God! That’s my bottle!” Louis was paralyzed at the base of the display. He didn’t know what was worse – that the Venus was missing or that the Venus was missing and had been replaced by his bottle. He debated with himself as to whether or not he should take a couple of swallows of the wine in order to calm his shaking knees.

To Claude it appeared that Louis was just standing around doing nothing. He joined him at the display.

”Don’t just stand there gaping! Get to your post, man!”

As Claude walked by Louis remained motionless. Claude thought he was being ignored. It was bad enough that Claude thought Louis was a lazy slob. Now he was being an insubordinate, lazy slob.

”I’m talking to you! I gave you an order!”

Louis didn’t respond verbally. He couldn’t. His vocal cords refused to work. Instead he raised his right arm and with his hand shaking, pointed at the bottle on the pedestal. Claude looked where Louis was pointing and felt his mouth go dry. His breathing became labored. He loosened his shirt collar as he began to chafe from the sweat that was oozing out of his pores.

The Venus was gone!

Now Claude began to panic. Instead of an alarm going off and all of the guards being alerted at the same time Claude now had to run through the museum to tell everyone that the statue had been stolen. Claude running through galleries and screaming at the top of his lungs only added to the confusion as guards and cleaning women wondered what all the fuss was about.

Claude realized that the police had to be alerted. But the alarm automatically did that and the alarm had been turned off. The alarm that he had turned off had to be restarted. Claude ran to the guards’ room and reached into his pocket to pull out the slip of paper with the combination. His nerves caused the paper to fall from his hand to the floor several time. The sweat from his palm began to smudge the numbers. He couldn’t control the speed of his fingers as they dialed past the designated numbers in the combination of the lock and he had to begin the whole thing over again. Each passing second seemed like an eternity. Finally, he opened the vault door and threw the ON/OFF switch to ON. He waited. Nothing. ”Of course, there’s nothing you fool. Something has to set off the alarm at the display!"

Lana lifted her head for a moment to observe the chaos. Some of the guards in running past the cleaning women accidentally kicked their scrub buckets and soapy water flew across the smooth surface of the floor making it hazardous to run . Some of the women wanted to know what all of the commotion was about. Something was stolen. What was stolen? Some guards knew. Other guards did not know. People were told to look. Look for what? Lana covered her mouth with her hand to keep from laughing. ”Normal human reactions.

She saw to blue lights around the display turn on. Then she saw the senior guard run out of the guards’ room back to the display. The guard who first discovered the missing Venus was still standing there paralyzed.

Lana was now at the entrance to the hallway that leads to the guards’ room. She entered the hallway and closed the door behind her. She opened the door to the room. She lifted her head and saw a dark capped figure sitting at the desk cutting a slice off a loaf of French bread. ”Oh my God! There’s a guard in the guards’ room! She backed out of the entrance but was soon grabbed from behind and lifted up into the air. A hand covered her mouth as she was pulled back into the room. Her first instinct was to scream but the large hand muffled the sound. She was going to kick out her legs when she was shoved against the wall. The hand was lifted off her mouth and replaced with something else.

Another mouth was on her mouth.

Even up close Lana was able to recognize the pair of blue-green eyes that were above the mouth that was pressing against her lips. The panic melted away. ”Clark!" Her struggling ended and she lifted her arms around Clark’s neck and held him tightly, crushing her lips into his. She pulled away for a moment and saw that he appeared to be dressed like a guard. Not exactly but close enough. Clark led Lana to the back door that he had discovered in the afternoon. They quickly walked down the steps and out of the building.

Claude screamed at Louis.

”Get that stupid bottle out of there!

Claude reached for the bottle and as soon as he did the alarm was activated. The echoing of the high pitched sound only added to the chaos.

Clark and Lana had gone halfway down the street to his car when they heard the alarm. For the third time that night the police sped to the museum. This time they did not leave.


**********

[kentfamily]

Roman Holiday was on the other day. And it just reminded me of this story. I never saw Roman Holiday until the other day. It was a beautiful romance story between the princess (Audrey Hepburn) and Joe Bradley (Gregory Peck or was it Cary Grant? I forgot who it was). Anyway, keep up the good work.:D:)

[The Black Cat]

That was great. PPMS!

[oldmankent]

Roman Holiday was on the other day. And it just reminded me of this story. I never saw Roman Holiday until the other day. It was a beautiful romance story between the princess (Audrey Hepburn) and Joe Bradley (Gregory Peck or was it Cary Grant? I forgot who it was). Anyway, keep up the good work.:D:)

Roman Holiday was Audrey Hepburn’s first motion picture. She won the Academy Award for Best Actress for it. Gregory Peck co-starred with her. The motion picture was directed by William Wyler, who is considered to be one of the great directors in movie history. Three times he won the Academy Award for best director along with best picture (Mrs. Miniver, The Best Years of Our Lives, and Ben Hur).

The movie this fic is based on was also directed by William Wyler.

Audrey Hepburn co-stared with Cary Grant in Charade.

And now the conclusion of The Caper.


Chapter Eight

CRIME OF THE CENTURY

Such was the lead story the next morning in all of the newspapers in France, most of the newspapers in Europe and none of the newspapers in the United States. An army of reporters and news people descended on the Lang residence. Lewis stood in front of an empty display. His face was the face of grief and despair. His held a soaked handkerchief to his eyes. Inside he was overjoyed. He didn’t know who did it but he had been spared prison and scandal. The reporters were firing off question after question.

”Monsieur Lang, how did you learn of the robbery?”

“I woke up in the night with a sudden premonition. At first I thought it was something I had eaten. But no. It was Monsieur Grummond from the museum on the telephone telling me the horrible news.”

“Are you offering a reward for the Venus?”

“Reward? Heavens no! How can I think of money at a time like this? Besides the Venus is priceless.”


**********

Lex Luthor was on his way to the Lang estate when he heard the news of robbery. He immediately redirected his limousine to the middle of the city to an office building. He took the elevator up several floors and stood in front of an office.


Henri Charles Boyer
Professor of Artistic Authentication
Universite de Paris

He quickly walked through the door without knocking to find Charles sitting at his desk reading the lead story in his newspaper. Lex couldn’t contain his excitement.

”I just heard the news! I can’t believe my ears or my eyes! It’s absolutely fantastic. To pull off a thing like that.”

“Apparently the police are conducting an investigation, Monsieur Luthor.”

“The police? Man, where’s your spirit? If we wait for the police the Cellini Venus will be out of the country. We’ll never set eyes on it again. Monsieur Boyer, I’m still vitally interested in the Cellini Venus – hot or cold. You know what I mean by that?”

“Lex, do you know what you’re saying? You’re compounding a felony. Offering to become a receiver of stolen goods.”

Lex was speaking with his entire body. Making wild exaggerated movements with his arms.

“I’m an art lover!

He tried to calm down.

”As a public service I want to make to make an independent inquiry to help the police. Is that a crime?”

“And if you find it a step or two ahead of the police?”

“You let me worry about that.”

Charles grew angry and rose to his feet.

”No! I’m an art dealer! Not a fence!”

“I’ll do it entirely on my own. All I need is an opening contact”

Charles thought for a moment of what Lex was asking for. He was very hesitant.

”There happens to be a man in Paris at the moment who specializes in matters of fine art. His name is….”

Lex was anxiously waiting for the name.

”His name is Clark Kent. He’s staying at the Ritz.”


**********

Lana had been dropped off by Clark just before one in the morning. The couple said little if anything. Mostly they just looked at each other. Smiling like two teenagers coming home from their first date.

Lana walked in her house and went immediately to her bedroom and took off her old clothes. The clothes were discarded into the trash bin. She took a brief shower and felt refreshed. She donned a nightgown and lay in her bed. Wide awake but knowing that as soon she closed her eyes she would drift off to sleep. Her last thought was, ”Life is so strange.”

Lana awoke several hours later when the sun came through her window. The butler served her breakfast in bed on a tray. Along with her food and coffee was a newspaper and the headline could not be missed. Lana couldn’t help but feel a sense of excitement and a guilty sense of accomplishment. She heard a commotion coming from downstairs and was told by the butler that reporters were with her father.

She turned on the radio. The stations were filled with reports of the theft. There was no shortage of the theories as to what had happened to the Cellini Venus.

It had left the country. It was in the country.
The Russians had done it. The Americans had done it.
It was an act of protest. It was an act of love.

What was clear was that no one knew what had happened.

Her telephone rang and she quickly picked it up. The voice on the other end brought an immediate smile to her face.

”Night fighter calling dawn patrol. Night fighter calling dawn patrol. Our telephone may be tapped so we’ll conduct this entire conversation in Swahili.”

Clark’s voice grew soft.

”How are you? Did you sleep well?”

“Oh Clark. Isn’t it awful? I slept beautifully and I’ve just eaten an enormous breakfast.”

“It’s your tainted blood.”

‘How’s our friend?”

“Who? Oh, she’s fine. She’s wrapped up in one of my old shirts. Just as snug as can be. I went off to sleep with her in my arms last night. First time I’ve ever done that with a mother.”

“Clark, do you think we should be seen together?”

Lana kept her fingers crossed waiting for Clark’s answer.

”Alright, in an hour at the Ritz bar.”


**********

It was only a second after Clark hung up the phone that it rang. It Charles Boyer from the Universite de Paris. Did Clark hear the news? Of course, how could he not hear the news? Did Clark know anything about the theft? Even if he did know it wouldn’t be wise to go around bragging about it. Would Clark be willing to meet an American millionaire regarding this new story? For Charles – yes.

It wasn’t long after he spoke with Charles that Clark received a call from someone waiting for him in the Ritz bar.


**********

Arbert Grummond from the Lafayette Museum was the last person to visit Lewis. He wanted to avoid the reporters. He stared at the empty space in the Display Room. Lewis had hung a shroud where the Venus used to be as if he were in mourning. In addition to the theft Grummond had more bad news for Lewis.

”The Cellini Venus was uninsured.”

“Uninsured?”

“Yes.”

“But I remember signing something for insurance.”

“Oh! But the policy was not yet enforced. Not until the technical examination had been made.”

“Ah yes! The technical examination. I imagine Professor Bauer will be greatly disappointed.”

Tears were starting to form in Grummond’s eyes. Lewis put his arm around the soon to discharged museum director as he led him to the door.

”Cheer up my fellow. It’s not the end of the world.”

Grummond left and Lewis began running up the stairs.

”Lana!”

“Dad!”

“Where are you?”

They ran together and embraced.

”I’m here! We’re saved!”

“Thank Heaven for the criminal class.”

“I’m so happy. You don’t have to go to jail. I don’t have to go to the Orient.”

“We must celebrate!”

“But not right away. I have a very important appointment at the Ritz.”

It was just now that Lewis noticed that Lana was dressed to go out. She gave her father a kiss on the cheek and scurried out of the house.

”The Ritz? Again?”


**********

Clark came down to the bar. He recognized the individual he was to meet by his hairless head. He sat down with Lex and the two men ordered drinks. Lex tried to allude to what he wanted without actually saying it. Clark placed a reassuring hand on his arm to tell Lex that he understood.

”You realize what you’re asking is extremely difficult and dangerous.”

“I know that Mr. Kent.”

“Please, no names. We may be up against some very desperate characters.”

He whispered in Lex’s ear. ”La Cosa Nostra.” Lex swallowed hard.

”Them?”

The seriousness of the expression on Clark’s face gave Lex his answer. Clark continued.

”Fortunately I have a few contacts. This morning I put out a few inquires, a few feelers. Idle curiosity.”

“You’ve got a lead?”

“Nothing concrete. Let’s just say I suspect who’s involved.”

“Is it still in France?”

“I think so. I think I can definitely state it still in France.”

Lex was rubbing his palms together. He was having trouble containing his excitement.

” You realize you might be paying a great deal of money for something you can never exhibit, never acknowledge, never even display even in your own house.”

“I know. I want it. I just want to take it out of the vault. All alone and just look it. And know that it’s mine. That I own it. I can touch it.”

Clark nodded his understanding. He now brought up one final subject.

”One more thing. Do you happen to know any members of the Lang family?”

“I met Lang. I know his daughter too. As a matter of fact I’m going to see her tonight.”

Clark’s expression became grave.

“Don’t! Drop her! Don’t see her! Don’t even telephone her! That’s vital! Any contact with any member of the Lang family will be fatal. The criminals will spot it and suspect a trap.”

“But we’re engaged.”

Clark smiled at Lex.

”You know you’re a lucky fellow. From what I hear she’s a wonderful girl. Ah what the hell. The world’s full of statues. Forget the Venus.”

“No! I’ll do everything you say. I give you my word.”

Clark could see that Lex was deadly serious.

”Okay. I’ll call you later in the day.”

“Alright. You’ll contact me. Thanks.”

“Sit tight. Wait for the call.”

Clark watched Lex as he left the table. “What an idiot!” He watched Lex walk through the glass doors of the bar. He stood for a moment and looked to his left. He grew alarmed and ran into the gift shop across from the bar. Lana came into view. She placed her hand into her purse and pulled out the jewelry box that Lex had given her the day before. She walked into the gift shop and tapped him on the shoulder. Lex practically jumped and ran out of the gift shop. Lana followed him, trying to give him the box. Lex pushed out his arms to fend away Lana. Finally, he ran out of view, leaving Lana standing alone by herself. Confused and still holding the jewelry box.

She entered the bar and quickly found Clark. He rose from the table to greet her.

”Hello.”

“Do I look alright?”

“Fine.”

Clark couldn’t help but stare at Lana in her designer outfit.

” No. Not fine. You look wonderful. Why?”

“I just met this fellow and he treated me like I was a leper or something. I just wanted to give him back this.”

She placed the box on the table. Clark made light of the situation.

”Oh really. Have a drink. Good for morale.”

“Yes. Some champagne to celebrate!”

Lana now felt guilty.

”You can’t celebrate a crime. That’s immoral. Well, you handle it. It’s too confusing.”

Clark spoke to the waiter.

”Bottle of Don Perignon, please.”

The waiter left and Clark resumed his attention to Lana.

”You’re at an awkward age. Too old to be a juvenile delinquent. Too young to be a hardened criminal.”

Lana was filled with excitement.

” We did it! Did you see the papers and the television? Did you hear the radio?
It’s the crime of the century practically. And we did it. Well, you were the brains behind it but I was of some help. Wasn’t I? I mean we worked well together. Considering it was our first job.”

“Shhh. Keep you voice down.”

“I know I shouldn’t carry on like this. It’s all in a day’s work for you. It’s my first burglary!”

“Mine too.”

Pulling it off the way we… did.

Lana wasn’t sure of what she had just heard.

”What?”

“My first burglary.”

Lana’s expression changed from excitement to concern. She unknowingly lowered her voice.

”Then what were you doing in the house that night?”

“Are you sure you want to know?”

“No….. Yes.”

Clark took Lana’s hands in his own.

”I’m a private detective specializing in stolen works of art and in tracing, detecting and exposing forgeries.”

Lana felt herself getting lightheaded.

”I’m also an authority on museum security being a special consultant to museums in London, New York, Chicago, Madrid, even Leningrad. I have degrees in the history of art and chemistry and a London University diploma with distinction in advanced criminology.”

“You’re all of that?”

“Yes.”

Lana couldn’t disguise the disappointment in her voice.

”Then you’re not a burglar?”

“I was chipping a piece of paint from your father’s Van Gogh when you loomed up in your nightie and shot me in the arm.”

Clark’s eyes lifted up. He rose to his feet. The waiter had brought the ice bucket with the champagne. Clark made another request.

”Bring another glass.”

Lana was confused. She turned around to see what Clark was looking at.

”Papa!”

Lewis was standing alongside the table. He noticed that Lana did not call him ‘dad’.

”I don’t believe we’ve met. My name is Lewis Lang. May I please join you?”

“Clark Kent. By all means please sit down.”

“Papa, this is a friend of mine. He’s a ..”

“Yes, blue-green eyes, dark, broad shoulders, tall, quite good looking, terrible man.”

Lana winced at the last two words. Lewis continued.

” I believe we have some interests in common.”

“You have two gorgeous girls in your family, Monsieur Lang.”

“Two?”

“The other is upstairs. Wrapped in a shirt in my room.”

“Aha! And which, may I ask, do you intend to keep?”

“The real one.”

“A very sound choice. May I say so?”

“I think so.”

“And the other?”

“I have plans for her too. I think you’ll be pleased.”

“Really?”

“In fact, I have to tend to her right now. If you’ll excuse me.”

Clark rose from the table and quickly left the bar. Lewis was taken aback by the sudden exit.

”Extraordinary. Is he always so abrupt?”

“Not in the closet.”

Lana took hold of jewelry box she had left on the table. She opened it up.

The ring was gone.


**********

Lex was on his private jet as it glided at 35,000 feet. Things had happened so quickly that he thought that perhaps he should offer this Kent fellow a job. He reviewed the last hour in his memory. Clark had delivered a box to Lex right at the jet.

”You’ve done a wonderful job. You sure you don’t want any money?”

““You will be contacted. Don’t worry if it’s not in the near future. The code word will be ‘togetherness’.”

“Togetherness. I got it!”

“Togetherness!” Lex liked that code word. He pulled out the box from underneath his seat and carried it back to rest room. He went inside and locked the door behind him. He placed the box on the sink and opened it. He removed the pages of newspaper. There it was in front of him.

The Venus!

”“What’s that wrapped around it’s neck?” There was a blue ribbon wrapped around the neck of the statue. On the end of the ribbon was a large diamond ring.

”This Kent guy is good!”


**********

Several Days Later

Clark was walking through the Lang mansion with Lewis. His car was loaded with luggage. The two men were waiting for Lana to come down from her bedroom.

”My dear boy! What a coup! He’s the only collector who would never dare have it tested. How much did you say he was paying for the Venus, my son?”

“I didn’t say, Papa.”

“But I’m sure you’ve come up with a nice round figure.”

“Oh I have.”

Clark made a wide circular motion with his finger.

”O… O… O… O….A gift from Lewis Lang to Lex Luthor. Sit down, Monsieur Lang. I mean ‘dad’”

Lewis didn’t like the look on Clark’s face.

”You happen to be a forger. My business happens to be catching forgers and putting them in prison.”

“Yes. That could be very awkward.”

“One of us has to retire.”

“Fair enough. Shall we toss a coin for it?”

“I’ve already tossed one.”

“And?”

“You lost....Come on. You had a great run. Champ!”

“Here is my answer.”

Lewis stood up. Looked Clark in eye and shook his hand in agreement.

”Why do I have the feeling that you two are deciding my future?

Lana had joined them. Lewis turned to Clark.

”You tell her. I’m too moved.”

“Dad has seen the light. He’s going straight.”

“Dad! Will you be alright?”

“He’ll survive and if we don’t get going we may miss our honeymoon.”

“This is a remarkable young man. The way he explained things. The path of righteousness.”

Lana took Clark’s arm and the couple exited the house. They were in his car and were about to go into the street when a limousine pulled in front of the house. Lana recognized the man who exited the vehicle. It was Senor Paravideo, the South American tycoon who wanted to buy her father’s Van Gogh. He approached Lewis cautiously. Lewis opened wide his arms as if he were greeting all old friend. He looked at Clark and Lana and waved his arms, trying to hurry them away. Clark spoke

”Who’s that?”

Lana thought for a moment and then answered

”Dad’s cousin. …From South America.”

Clark was about to put the car into gear but stopped.

”You know. For someone who just started lying recently, you’re showing a real flair.”

Lana wrapped her arms around Clark’s neck.

”Oh Clark! I love you too!”


The End
**********



That’s it folks! If you’re interested in the movie the details are as follows:

How To Steal A Million
Released in 1966.
Directed by William Wyler (Academy Award winner for Mrs. Miniver, The BestYears of Our Lives and Ben Hur.
Starring:
Audrey Hepburn
Peter O’Toole
Hugh Griffith
Eli Wallach

[The Black Cat]

Very good story. I liked it a lot. Thanks!

[kentfamily]

Thanks so much for The Caper. It was very entertaining. My favorite is still
Breakfast at Tiffany's and now Roman Holiday also. This fic was wonderful as well.;)