Quotes you "wish" were in Wrath

[xrayvision]

Lana: Hahaha, Clark, I have your powers. Now you will be the one crying about secrets and lies.

Clark: Take 'em. All I wanted was to sit in my barn with pie in one hand and Shelby's fur in the other.

Lana: I will do everything you never did.

Clark: By the way, having my powers also means having my daddy.

Lana: Oh cool. I get a new dad too. I haven't had one since season 2.

Clark (grinning): Oh, I'm sure you'll have plenty of fun with him. Have a nice life Lana.

<Later on as Lana is riding her Rascal Scooter...as Randy G put it>

Jor-El: You will obey me you crazy b*tch!!!!

[Silent Kal]

Clark: Gee, Shelby, I didn't realize Lana had so much homicidal rage pent up inside her. She was ready to kill Lex tonight, and I just barely stopped her.

Shelby (thinking): ["Yeah, no crap, dude. You don't hear her phone conversations when you go out to fix that stupid tractor--which still doesn't make sense with the whole superhearing thing... Anyways. She's evil, man. I have been hoping you'd pick up on this for years now, but I'm just glad the truth has finally made it through that dense skull of--"]

Clark: Maybe she needs more hugs. And pie. Hugs and pie always cheer me up!

Shelby: ["...Wait--what?!?"]

Clark: What do you say, girl? Wanna help me make Lana a nice pie to make her happy and less likely to kill people?

Shelby: ["...Wow. I need to find smarter humans. Hanging around this clown will only make be DUMBER. I'm outta here."]

Clark: Hey, Shelby, where you goin' girl? Shelby?

[JudasAce]

Clark: Wow, you got my powers Lana!

Lana: No I didn't! I don't know what you mean! That's just silly! People can't do those kinds of things! IT WAS JUST A LUCKY PUNCH!

Clark: Wow, I guess you got my lying powers too!

[CountryGirl84]

Lana: Clark, I have your powers, now we can make superbabies on the barn floor.

Clark: Uhhh Lana, you're kind of making me uncomfortable...

Lana: Shut up Clark, you talk too much...

Clark: I've just gotta... uh... get that... thing... you know... for my mom... uhhh....

*superspeeds away from Lana as fast as Kryptonianly possible*

[xrayvision]

Lana: You can do anything and all you've done is hide out on some farm.

Clark: If my ass wasn't hiding out on this farm, you'd be dead...hmm, let's check out the KO count...40.5 times by now. You would have also exploded out of secrets & lies obsession, so make that 41.5 times. It's saving your dumb ass and stopping all the crap that you caused like that 2nd meteor showed that has kept my ass on this farm. But instead of being grateful and realizing that you're at fault, you blame me.

<Clark grabs the exposed wire that's hanging>

Clark: Time to taze your ass b*tch and get some long deserved respect out of you!! Although by the time I'm done, Lionel's radical electroshock therapy he performed on Lex will seem like the shock of static electricity. Not only will you not remember me, but you won't know who you are or why you were put on this Earth, questions that still haunt me and the rest of this town.

[yosemiteangel]

Lana: Clark, I'm sorry. I went crazy with your powers. I don't think humans can handle them! (starts crying)

Clark: Physically no, mentally yes. My dad did. You didn't. Good-bye Lana. (walks away)

[Dodge006]

Chloe: "God Clark! Even Lana figured out how to fly before you. Dumbass!"

[Alexander III]

Lana: Ohh yesss give it to me Clarkie
Clark: Lana, u heard the whole town's shaking?
Lana: Shut up Clark and do wut u do best!

Chloe: Is it earthquake? Oh no! Is it another meteor shower?????

[Lostfan588]

Originally posted by Alexander III
Lana: Ohh yesss give it to me Clarkie
Clark: Lana, u heard the whole town's shaking?
Lana: Shut up Clark and do wut u do best!

Chloe: Is it earthquake? Oh no! Is it another meteor shower?????


:rotfl:


Oh I love it!!!

God I cant wait to see the whole eppy!!!!!:lol:

[bad3appels]

Originally posted by Alexander III
Lana: Ohh yesss give it to me Clarkie
Clark: Lana, u heard the whole town's shaking?
Lana: Shut up Clark and do wut u do best!

Chloe: Is it earthquake? Oh no! Is it another meteor shower?????

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Clark: How is it?
Lana: it is super.....
Clark: i know,i`m superman
Lana: Yeees and this is super sex
Clark: are you enjoying this?
Lana: every second of it

:lol:

[Aldo]

Originally posted by Silent Kal
Clark: Gee, Shelby, I didn't realize Lana had so much homicidal rage pent up inside her. She was ready to kill Lex tonight, and I just barely stopped her.

Shelby (thinking): ["Yeah, no crap, dude. You don't hear her phone conversations when you go out to fix that stupid tractor--which still doesn't make sense with the whole superhearing thing... Anyways. She's evil, man. I have been hoping you'd pick up on this for years now, but I'm just glad the truth has finally made it through that dense skull of--"]

Clark: Maybe she needs more hugs. And pie. Hugs and pie always cheer me up!

Shelby: ["...Wait--what?!?"]

Clark: What do you say, girl? Wanna help me make Lana a nice pie to make her happy and less likely to kill people?

Shelby: ["...Wow. I need to find smarter humans. Hanging around this clown will only make be DUMBER. I'm outta here."]

Clark: Hey, Shelby, where you goin' girl? Shelby?


Man!! Shelby is DUDE! xD

[Silent Kal]

Clark doesn't know how to tell a boy dog from a girl dog.

[Twitch]

Chloe: Clark I got your message and got here as quickly as possible! What's wrong it sounded urgent? And why are we at the Smallville electrical station?

Clark: Oh I'm just ripping out some high voltage power lines.

Chloe: What? Clark you said it was an emergency!

Clark: It is Chloe, just bear with me. *Clark pulls out a lead box and takes out some kryptonite* Oh would you mind holding this kryptonite for me?

Chloe: Oh my God Clark what are you doing with kryptonite!?!

Clark: Just take it Chloe, and don't throw it away.

Chloe: But Clark it can kill you!

Clark: Don't argue with me Chloe! This will only take a second.

*Clark grabs an exposed power line, holds Chloe's hand containing the kryptonite and zaps himself*

Chloe: AHHHH! Clark what the hell just happened?!?

Clark: Calm down Chloe, you have all my powers now.

Chloe: Wha-? *Chloe superspeeds around* Oh my God this is so cool!

Clark: Yeah I know... So Chloe have you ever seen my bedroom?

Chloe: Huh? What do you mean Clark?

Clark: Oh you know what I mean sweet cheeks. *winks*

Chloe: Clark! How dare you talk to me like th-

Clark: Oh shut up you know you want to.

Chloe: What?!? No I would nev - Oh screw it! *Chloe picks up Clark and superspeeds to the bedroom, Smallville is hit with some seismic tremors*


A few hours later...


Lois: Hey Smallville I got your message, this better be important. So what's the emergency? And why the hell are you ripping out those power lines?

Clark: Oh hey Lois. Would you mind holding this meteor rock for me?...

[jr23tw]

Lana: Mind your own business Chloe.

[dh1031]

Too bad they did not have Lex go back to quoting Montaigne, "Obsession is the wellspring of genius and madness." when he was talking to Clark about obsession. That would have been cool!! :)

[DarthJay]

Lois: Hey...isn't that the harddrive Lana kicked me through the window over earlier today? And who were you just on the phone with calling "Sir" -- you run this newspaper...who would you be calling "Sir?" Hey! Wait a minute...this all makes sense now! That was Le....

Grant: <KISS>

Lois: <Giggle>

Grant: Man, you are easily distracted.

Lois: <Giggle>

[bluecheeze]

Originally posted by Twitch
Chloe: Clark I got your message and got here as quickly as possible! What's wrong it sounded urgent? And why are we at the Smallville electrical station?

Clark: Oh I'm just ripping out some high voltage power lines.

Chloe: What? Clark you said it was an emergency!

Clark: It is Chloe, just bear with me. *Clark pulls out a lead box and takes out some kryptonite* Oh would you mind holding this kryptonite for me?

Chloe: Oh my God Clark what are you doing with kryptonite!?!

Clark: Just take it Chloe, and don't throw it away.

Chloe: But Clark it can kill you!

Clark: Don't argue with me Chloe! This will only take a second.

*Clark grabs an exposed power line, holds Chloe's hand containing the kryptonite and zaps himself*

Chloe: AHHHH! Clark what the hell just happened?!?

Clark: Calm down Chloe, you have all my powers now.

Chloe: Wha-? *Chloe superspeeds around* Oh my God this is so cool!

Clark: Yeah I know... So Chloe have you ever seen my bedroom?

Chloe: Huh? What do you mean Clark?

Clark: Oh you know what I mean sweet cheeks. *winks*

Chloe: Clark! How dare you talk to me like th-

Clark: Oh shut up you know you want to.

Chloe: What?!? No I would nev - Oh screw it! *Chloe picks up Clark and superspeeds to the bedroom, Smallville is hit with some seismic tremors*


A few hours later...


Lois: Hey Smallville I got your message, this better be important. So what's the emergency? And why the hell are you ripping out those power lines?

Clark: Oh hey Lois. Would you mind holding this meteor rock for me?...

This is quality script!!:rotfl:

[DarthJay]

Chloe: Where have you two been? There have been tremors all over town.

Clark: Ummm...that was probably us.

Lana: Yeah, there was a little accident and I have Clark's powers now, too.

Chloe: So wait. Are you telling me that you guys have been romping all around the farm for the last two hours super-doing each other?! I mean, c'mon.....enough with you two already!! It was cute for the first couple of years, but look out there (points out to TV)....they are SICK OF IT. With all the cool things going on in Smallville right now, the last thing THEY want to see is another tired twist to the Lana/Clark love story. I emplore you to just...stop....for the love of all that is holy.....just STOP. Yuck. Yuck. Yuck. I need a shower.....

[NoSupeForYou]

Clark: Sure you have my powers, but I don't see you fixing that tractor.
Lana: It's just a stupid wreck.
Clark: That tractor is the key to saving the world, just you watch!
...Later after the super sex.
Clark: Oh God no! We smashed the tractor! Now I gotta start over.
Lana: Sometimes I think you want to be with that tractor more than you wanna be with me.

[DarthJay]

Chloe: Did you guys not hear all those tremors?

Clark: Oh, that was just my dad turning in his grave from the rediculousness of this episode.

[Twitch]

Originally posted by bluecheeze
This is quality script!!:rotfl:
Why thank you. :)

[NoSupeForYou]

Shelby: You guys trashed the barn? Damn it, that's the only place I appear and I always have to share my screen time with that damn tractor.

[xrayvision]

<Chloe uses the key to get through the portal in the cave to the FOS>

Chloe: Hello Jor-El.

Jor-El: You are the girl who interrupted my son's training. Why are you here.

Chloe: To get rid of the girl who's preventing him from training now. I know you're the best at undermining people and tearing them down.

Jor-El: Gaarsh...you're making me blush.

Chloe: There's someone I need you to smite.

Jor-El: I don't do that anymore.

Chloe: Can you at least brand her?

Jor-El: Where?

Chloe: Her forehead. I have three numbers for you to put on her forehead.

Jor-El: 6-6-6?

Chloe: Yes.

<Later on>

Chloe (on her cell): Hello? Is this Dean Winchester? I got a job for you.

[maryjanewatson]

Clark: Chloe, Lana has all of my powers, plus one. *looks around* She can fly. *serious face*

Chloe: ..... this is just sad. Go eat some kryptonite Clark.

[jesustlife]

On the phone:

Lionel: Soooo..Martha. What you wearing..?

Martha: Oh...nothing really.

Lionel: You make me so hot, you devil. Oh, sorry your son just got in. Bye.

[Superhuman_Devotion]

These are all so funny! :rotfl:

[Dew_drops]

Originally posted by jesustlife
On the phone:

Lionel: Soooo..Martha. What you wearing..?

Martha: Oh...nothing really.

Lionel: You make me so hot, you devil. Oh, sorry your son just got in. Bye.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

excellent

[Mello Penelo]

"Lana, I can't trust you. We can't stay together like this. You need to leave." ~Clark

[NoSupeForYou]

Morpheus: Hey, if I can teach Keanu to fight, I can teach you.

Later that day...
Clark: Mo, I got beat up by a girl.
Morpheus: Again? God Clark you have the slowest reflexes ever. And how many times do i have to explain this to you; even among humans boys are bigger and stronger than girls.
Clark: But she had superpowers as well.
Morpheus: So what you're saying is that girls gain more power than boys when they get superpowers? That's retarded.
Clark: Sorry, Mo, I wasn't paying attention because these pills are just my color. Can I have them both?

Morpheus: The red one will help you see who you have to become, the blue one will send you back to the farm to live a normal life.
Clark: Give me the blue! Give me the blue!

[Sweetie]

Clark:So,you had my powers!

Lana:Incredible wasn't it?

Clark:Not really...It's an overused storylines like love's triangles,meteor freaks and kryptonites!

Lana:Oh!You're probably right!

Clark: Do you know what you would be totally unexpected...Clark grabs Lana by the neck: Die you *****!!!

[Kryptonian-Ronin]

Originally posted by Sweetie
Clark:So,you had my powers!

Lana:Incredible wasn't it?

Clark:Not really...It's an overused storylines like love's triangles,meteor freaks and kryptonites!

Lana:Oh!You're probably right!

Clark: Do you know what you would be totally unexpected...Clark grabs Lana by the neck: Die you *****!!!

:rotfl:

Nice.

[Odysseus]

Lana drags Lex into the lab...

Lex: Wait a minute, you've got powers...oh my God, you're a member of the alien species I've been studying!*Presses a hidden button on one of his cufflinks*

A LuthorCorp SWAT Team bursts in and immediately begins spraying Lana with Kryptonite bullets.

Lex: We're shipping you off to 33.1, *****!

[ginnyfan]

Oh Twitch that was hilarious. So many good posts.

******************************

Chloe [rushes into SV Medical]: OMG Lois! Are you ok?

[Chloe tries to hug her but Lois holds her off wincing.]

Lois: The ex-Mrs. Luthor went psycho on Grant when he refused to print the dirt she was dishing out on Lex.

Chloe: Lana?!

Lois: Yup. She was like a leather clad terminatrix from hell.

[Chloe sighs and looks toward the entrance, nervously wondering what's taking Clark so long. Chloe would rather double team it on misdirecting Lois' curiosity. She notices Lois staring at her wistfully. Chloe is immediately uncomfortable and clears her throat nervously.]

Chloe [chuckling]: Do you think the medical bills would be less if we just rented a room? [Grins.] And why do the Smallville ambulance drivers answer calls in Metropolis... I mean...

Lois: Chloe...

Chloe: Lois I don't-

Lois: I know you're not ready to talk about it, and I don't want to push. But... what happened in that dam is not just about you Chloe. It's about me too. I mean... I should be dead.

Chloe [mutters]: You're not the only one...

Lois: There's not even a scar! And our relationship has become virtually nonexistent despite the fact that we share an apartment. Don't think I haven't noticed that you're avoiding me lil cuz.

Chloe: I'M not the one whose always schmoozing with the editor being sent away on special assignments.

Lois: And I'M not the one putting everything on hold to help my friends. I love Clark too Chloe but he's a big boy!

Chloe: Lois you don't know WHAT you're talking about so-

Lois: Well I WOULD know if you'd tell me. But this is me changing the subject because I don't want to pressure you.

[Lois does not change the subject but stares contemplatively at Chloe. Chloe rolls her eyes at the ceiling for a moment before noticing that Lois has forgotten about the ice pack. She takes it from Lois' hand and pushes it, a little roughly against Lois' shoulder.]

Lois: Ow!

...

Chloe: That... article you wrote... about the mysterious Luthorcorp land where Lionel was found.

[Lois nods curiously.]

Chloe: It was good. I mean it won't be a drop in the ocean of articles praising Lex for his philanthropy but... way to go against the grain.

[Lois smiles.]

Lois: Don't think I didn't read the one you wrote about the frozen Corn Princess. And that interview with Rachel Davenport got national attention. After chasing that girl around L.A. I've gotta say, I'm impressed.

Chloe [very pleased]: Oh... I had help from a friend... and she's insanely famous. Her sneezes get national attention.

Lois [brushing off the self-deprecation]: I'm your biggest fan Chlo.

[Chloe smiles and leans in for a half hug as Clark Kent ARRIVES!]

(Thanks some clever person in another thread for "terminatrix" LOL!)

[JorEl23]

Chloe (after rushing to the Kent Farm): Guys, there have been mini tremors all over Smallville!! And I couldn't get in touch with either of you the whole time! What was that!?!?!??

Lana: They're called ORGASMS Chloe, and if you weren't still hanging around hoping for sloppy seconds and worrying about what we're doing, you might already know. For goodness sake Chloe, Jimmy was cute and treated you like a fairy princess, don't listen to these idiot friends of yours that insist you hang around and wait for Clark, go after him hard before it's too late...

Chloe(blushing and flustered): You're right Lana...people with unreasonable expectations aren't the best advice givers. I once had a pal at the Planet that insisted I change my name to Lois!! How moronic would that be, being my own cousin has the same name and we're always together!! But wait...too late?? Did something happen to my Jimmy in those quakes???? (tearing up)

Lana: Not at all Chloe, but I can tell you from experience...once he gets some Super @ss from Kara...you got a better shot of winning a Pulitzer than getting him back .....

LOL ;) ;) ;) ;)

[last man of krypton]

Lana: I will dig up every track you have buried until it kills me.

Lex: <hands her a shovel> There you go, I wish you the best.

[Twitch]

Originally posted by ginnyfan
Oh [b]Twitch that was hilarious. So many good posts.

******************************

Chloe [rushes into SV Medical]: OMG Lois! Are you ok?

[Chloe tries to hug her but Lois holds her off wincing.]

Lois: The ex-Mrs. Luthor went psycho on Grant when he refused to print the dirt she was dishing out on Lex.

Chloe: Lana?!

Lois: Yup. She was like a leather clad terminatrix from hell.

[Chloe sighs and looks toward the entrance, nervously wondering what's taking Clark so long. Chloe would rather double team it on misdirecting Lois' curiosity. She notices Lois staring at her wistfully. Chloe is immediately uncomfortable and clears her throat nervously.]

Chloe [chuckling]: Do you think the medical bills would be less if we just rented a room? [Grins.] And why do the Smallville ambulance drivers answer calls in Metropolis... I mean...

Lois: Chloe...

Chloe: Lois I don't-

Lois: I know you're not ready to talk about it, and I don't want to push. But... what happened in that dam is not just about you Chloe. It's about me too. I mean... I should be dead.

Chloe [mutters]: You're not the only one...

Lois: There's not even a scar! And our relationship has become virtually nonexistent despite the fact that we share an apartment. Don't think I haven't noticed that you're avoiding me lil cuz.

Chloe: I'M not the one whose always schmoozing with the editor being sent away on special assignments.

Lois: And I'M not the one putting everything on hold to help my friends. I love Clark too Chloe but he's a big boy!

Chloe: Lois you don't know WHAT you're talking about so-

Lois: Well I WOULD know if you'd tell me. But this is me changing the subject because I don't want to pressure you.

[Lois does not change the subject but stares contemplatively at Chloe. Chloe rolls her eyes at the ceiling for a moment before noticing that Lois has forgotten about the ice pack. She takes it from Lois' hand and pushes it, a little roughly against Lois' shoulder.]

Lois: Ow!

...

Chloe: That... article you wrote... about the mysterious Luthorcorp land where Lionel was found.

[Lois nods curiously.]

Chloe: It was good. I mean it won't be a drop in the ocean of articles praising Lex for his philanthropy but... way to go against the grain.

[Lois smiles.]

Lois: Don't think I didn't read the one you wrote about the frozen Corn Princess. And that interview with Rachel Davenport got national attention. After chasing that girl around L.A. I've gotta say, I'm impressed.

Chloe [very pleased]: Oh... I had help from a friend... and she's insanely famous. Her sneezes get national attention.

Lois : I'm your biggest fan Chlo.

[Chloe smiles and leans in for a half hug as Clark Kent ARRIVES!]

(Thanks some clever person in another thread for "terminatrix" LOL!)
Aww that was great, I would have loved to see that scene. Gotta love Chlo-Lo!

[DarkChilde]

Lana: Don't worry I can't possibly get pregant. I am a Human and you are a BDA.

---------------------------

Oliver: (on his Cell Phone) Clark I have noticed some sesmic activity in your vacinity. Is Lex..
Clark: (Cutting Oliver off midsentence)Don't worry about it, I just got laid.

---------------------------

Chloe: Hey did you guys feel those tremors...
Clark: Yea appearantly the beans the Ben Hubbard brought over were Meteor Infected.

---------------------------

Lana: Lex don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I am angry.
(Show Stewie with the Incredible Hulk them on the Monitor)

---------------------------

Chloe: Clark you are so whipped.

[svtwamedfan05]

Clark: I don't love you Lana, I only love the idea of you.

Clark to Lana: You disgust me

Lois to Grant: God you are so easy. You are so working with Lex

Chloe: Face it Lana you're going down, whether you like it or not. I will make sure of it

Lois, Lex, Lionel, and Chloe: Lana has some major issues, Clark get it through your think head already. You can't save everyone.

Lex: God Clark how naive are you?

[joel_welling93]

You guys crack me up!!!!! I cant stop laughing!!!!:rotfl:

[xrayvision]

Clark: I see, once again, you managed to walk away from a major debacle unscathed.

Lana: I was only there at your barn, Clark, because I was concerned about you.

Clark: And my secret.

Lana: I was as shocked to find out that you have abilities and are an alien whose arrival caused the death of my parents.

Clark: In yesterday's melee, I didn't get a chance to tell you about a certain piece of information about me.

Lana: Oh, Clark...

Clark: Don't worry, Lana. It wasn't about those secrets & lies. It was about us.

Lana: Yes, well, we, uh, put that tragedy behind a year ago, didn't we?

Clark: I didn't kill them.

Lana: Clark, I understand that you need to, uh, excuse your behavior, but I, uh, I know where you came from, Clark. I know that the meteors that arrived with your ship killed my parents. It's the past. It's history.

Clark: Zod did it. He destroyed Krypton, and my entire race. The only one I killed was my adoptive father. That's what I repressed.

Lana: Don't you dare. I won't let you desecrate your father's memory like that.

Clark: I don't blame me. I blame you.

Lana: What are you talking about? Your father died because of his bad heart. You would never-- you're not capable of murdering your father! You loved him like he was your biological father! Just like you loved me.

Clark: Loved you so much I couldn't bear the thought of you dying because I proposed to you & told you my secret, going back in time to save you from that bus & allowing him to meet Lionel and die as a result of it.

Lana: All right, Clark. Why would you take the blame for your father's death and break up with me?

Clark: Because I didn't want your blood on my hands, Lana. I knew you wouldn't stop going to Lex behind my back and would ultimately die if things continued as they did. But my dad... he was the lamb to the slaughter.

Lana: Oh...I... If I'd known, if... If I'd seen...

Clark: What?

Lana: Things would've been s-- so different between us.

Clark: Yes, Lana. You might've actually given up secrets & lies and not have run off to Lex.

<Lana tries to touch him>

Clark: No. No.

Lana: I--

[NoSupeForYou]

Lana smash!

[xrayvision]

^^Clark: Clark thrust!

Though that scene (the tainting of Clark by screwing the vile, corrupt Lana) sickened me.

[Crusader]

*Clark to Lana*

"So...was that good for you?"

[xrayvision]

Clark: Lex, how come you're not the evil bastard Sageeth is supposed to be?

Lex: Because Lana has my balls in a jar.

Clark: Your's too?

Lex: I was gonna ask you why you haven't left the farm and started doing your heroics on a global scale, but you've just answered my question.

Clark: Wanna go get our balls back?

Lex: No. I'm too intimidated by she who can do no wrong.

Clark: Yeah, me too. I miss them. My Clarky stick is all alone by himself down there.

Lex: Same with Cuestick. Hey that gives me an idea. Let's shoot some pool.

Clark: Good idea. We can play with balls without having to face up to Lana.

Lex: Oh wait, Lana took that away too. Remind me why I wanted her again?

Clark: Because I had her.

Lex: See Clark, had you been honest with me about Lana, I would have never fallen for her and we would still be buddies.

Clark: We still can. Hey, I know...let's have a sleepover and brush each other's hair.

Lex: Well, that would be a little tough for me Clark.

Clark: At least Lana's my princess.

Lex: Clark, she took away our balls.

Clark: Yeah, but that was my fault. I lied to her for all those years and forgot to get her a birthday gift a few years ago so she took them as her gift.

Lex: Oh brother!

[Sweetie]

Originally posted by xrayvision
Clark: Lex, how come you're not the evil bastard Sageeth is supposed to be?

Lex: Because Lana has my balls in a jar.

Clark: Your's too?

Lex: I was gonna ask you why you haven't left the farm and started doing your heroics on a global scale, but you've just answered my question.

Clark: Wanna go get our balls back?

Lex: No. I'm too intimidated by she who can do no wrong.

Clark: Yeah, me too. I miss them. My Clarky stick is all alone by himself down there.

Lex: Same with Cuestick. Hey that gives me an idea. Let's shoot some pool.

Clark: Good idea. We can play with balls without having to face up to Lana.

Lex: Oh wait, Lana took that away too. Remind me why I wanted her again?

Clark: Because I had her.

Lex: See Clark, had you been honest with me about Lana, I would have never fallen for her and we would still be buddies.

Clark: We still can. Hey, I know...let's have a sleepover and brush each other's hair.

Lex: Well, that would be a little tough for me Clark.

Clark: At least Lana's my princess.

Lex: Clark, she took away our balls.

Clark: Yeah, but that was my fault. I lied to her for all those years and forgot to get her a birthday gift a few years ago so she took them as her gift.

Lex: Oh brother!


:lol:

[Odysseus]

Clark: Lana, I finally realize that you're evil. You are not the woman I thought you were. You're just as bad as the Luthors...if not worse. Get off my farm.

Lana:*crocodile tears forming in her eyes* But Claaark, you CAN'T kick me off the farm! Where will I go?

Clark: Well for starters, there's your Aunt Nell's house in Metropolis, I'm sure you can afford to take a bus to get there considering the fact that you stole $10 million. And then there's Henry Small's house...oh wait, you CAN'T stay there because his wife hates your guts (and I finally understand why.) Hmm, I suppose you can either stay at Nell's or some hotel.

Lana: Clark, I will never forgive you for thi...

Clark: Blah blah blabbity blah. So what, are you gonna set up hidden cameras around the farm to watch my every move from that spy room of yours? Or are you gonna try to let that crazy lady in the woods hold my mom hostage for a few weeks to get revenge like you did with Lionel?

Lana: How dare you...

Clark: No, how dare YOU sponge off both Lex and me for the past few years. It's time you go off and get a job again instead of depending on stolen Luthor money and freeloading on my farm.

[xrayvision]

^^That should have been the closing scene of this episode.