clana4ev3r
09-15-2006, 08:43 PM
Just another quick story I came up with. :) It takes place somewhere after "Hypnotic" but before "Void"... Let's just pretend for a moment here that Lana never went to Lex after Clark broke up with her...okay? okay. ;D
!~
Clark stared into the darkness of the cloudy night as he stood perfectly still by the loft window. His arms were folded across his chest and his back was straight. His face was stone, no motion; not a blink, not a twitch. His movement was totally still and the only thing that had movement were the droplets of tears streaking down his cheeks.
A thousand knives pierced his heart as the painful memory did nothing but replay in his mind. Showing him...reminding him of what he had done. Of what he had lost and may never get back again. Someone so precious to him that he thought he could never touch again.
Sticks and stones can break my bones but words could never hurt me. Wasn’t that the saying? Well, whoever said that obviously hasn’t been in love before. Yes, sticks and stones could break the bones but words could break the heart. The heart was something to be treasured, to be taken cared of and to be loved. Not to be broken and stepped on like fragile glass.
The silence of the night couldn’t calm the rage inside him. Instead, it ignited it. He just wanted to break something…punch something to make the pain go away. He just wanted to unleash and breakdown.
The reality of it all was slowly sinking to him with each passing day and right now, reality was finally hitting him after three days.
She was gone. It wasn’t a nightmare and it wasn’t an illusion, she was gone. Stepped out of his life just as simple as she took the final steps down his loft after ending it between them; finally ending it between them.
He kept thinking that it was the right thing to do, to let her go; to help her let him go. He couldn’t string her along into his mess and keep her in the dark. It wasn’t right… but then again, what he did to her wasn’t right either.
But he just wanted her to let go . Forget about him and move on to someone who could make her happy and satisfy her needs. He couldn’t give her that because of who he was and ever shall be.
He turned around as he took a deep breath and wiped away the tears on his cheeks. Clark walked over to the couch and sat heavily down on it. He pulled his legs up to his chest and hung his arms over it as he stared into the blank void, reminiscing of the good times he shared with his angel.
A memory from last year’s barn raising entered through his mind as he shuffled through the good times. That had been the best summer of his life; he had everything he ever wanted or dreamed of. He was human and he loved Lana like she was supposed to be loved.
A bittersweet small smile tugged at his lips as he remembered what had happened when they were sent to get some nails back at the farm. It was just like yesterday that they were in his loft, being the naughty teenagers they were.
They entered the barn breathlessly from climbing up the hill. They held hands until Clark broke away to retrieve the nails.
“This will only take a sec.”
“No hurry, I think I need a break anyway.” She sighed heavily as she sat down on the big crate next to the tool drawers.
“Found em’.” Lana let out an airy laugh as Clark put the nails down beside her.
“You know sometimes taking your time isn’t a bad idea.” He smiled as she returned it with a dorky grin.
“Sorry.” He smiled apologetically at her.
“It’s okay.” She gave a toothy grin as she started to get up. “We should probably be heading back anyway.”
“You’re right…we should probably be heading back.” He gave her a mischievous smile as he stopped her in her tracks when she was about to walk pass by him.
Lana felt her heart race as she looked up at him lustful eyes as he reflected off of them. He bent down captured her lips in a passionate kiss as Lana wrapped her arms around his neck.
They both pulled away, breathless from the kiss and looked into each other’s eyes.
“Everybody’s waiting for us at the barn raising.”
“Which means we’re all alone…” she pointed out as Clark broke out into a boyish grin. They both ran up the stairs to the loft and initiated in a heavy make-out session that included lots of kissing and Clark’s shirt coming off, much to Lana’s delight.
From standing up to sitting down on the couch, the couple continued on with their private session.
He would do anything to have those kinds of moments again with her, but he knew it was impossible.
Just like it was impossible to hate her. He wanted to hate her, he wanted to be angry at her, but he couldn’t. He wouldn’t. She didn’t deserve it and he didn’t have the right to give it.
He just wanted to blame someone else for his actions but he knew he couldn’t, because it was his actions and his choices that put him where he was right now. He didn’t want to hold the weight of the world on his shoulders, he didn’t want to break up with Lana, he didn’t want to be an alien from a distant planet, and he didn’t want to loose his dad… He just wanted to be the normal farm boy, Clark Kent.
He buried his head into his arms and whispered the four words that she would long to have heard, lived for even, but nothing but the empty air was there.
“I love you Lana.”
~!
Lana came unlocked the door to her dorm room with books in her hand after coming from her last class of the day. She blew outwardly as she set her keys and books down on her bed.
She just wanted to change and jump into bed and sleep. The day had been a long and tiresome day and she just wanted to sleep. Lana glanced over at her desk and saw the scattered papers on it. She had busied her self these pass few days that she hardly had time to organize anything anymore.
Deciding that she should at least clean her desk up, she walked over to it and started gathering the papers together. She finished gathering her papers as she picked up the last piece that was scattered.
Almost instantly, her eyes of exhaustion turned into to one of pain. She picked up the object like it was going to break with the slightest of touches. It had several creases in the picture showing the many times it was folded, but in this case, crumpled.
She couldn’t remember how many times she crumpled the picture up out of anger and hurt and later on dig it out of the garbage. It was a picture that Clark and she had taken in a photo booth during the summer when they were together. They had been walking around the town just exploring when they came across a store that had a photo booth in it and Lana begged Clark to take pictures. He was a bit unsure at first because he was a bit photogenic but with a sweet smile from Lana, he could do anything.
There were four other pictures that were taken too, but this one in particular was one that Lana wanted to blow up to a regular sized picture instead of a small one.
Lana was smiling brightly in the picture but Clark wasn’t. He wasn’t even looking at the camera. He was looking at her. At the angle he was in, you could see his eyes just stare at her with affection. She loved this picture because in that one moment captured, she could see the love he had for her.
In that one moment, she could tell how much he loved her, how much he cared for her…she didn’t know how to explain it. It was like, in that one moment, he showed her his heart and maybe even gave it to her without her even knowing what she had in her hands.
It was a perfect moment. She always thought every time she looked at the picture. But ever since their...separation, every time she looked at the picture her heart ached so much.
It showed her the opposite of what they were now…in the present. They weren’t together anymore and she knew that they couldn’t be friends, it would hurt too much. Their relationship was broken beyond repair.
The secrets, the lies, and the four words ended the game of love between them…forever. The four words still ran through her mind like the plague. The familiar sting in her eyes started to surface as she thought more about it.
This was why she buried herself in her studies and busied herself to exhaustion. She didn’t want to face reality.
Didn’t want to face the reality that it was over between them.
Didn’t want to face the reality that he didn’t love her anymore.
Didn’t want to face the reality that Clark Kent didn’t love Lana Lang anymore.
The memory hit her like a ton of bricks as she remembered that fateful day three days ago. It was by far the worst moment of her life aside from her parents’ death.
She sat down on her bed and curled her legs up to her chest as she set the picture down on her bed. After all they’ve been through, it all ended like this. Heartbreak.
She tried to break down that wall that kept her from knowing the real Clark Kent. She knew there was something special about him…something very unique and she was so close to finding out until he shut her out…again. But this time, it was permanent.
She sobbed as she remembered a memory that took place on the very bed she was sitting on. She bowed her head down to her knees as she let the silence envelope her and let the memory over take her…even for just a moment.
She tried to calm her excitement when she heard the knock on the door signaling someone outside.
“Coming.” She set down her astronomy homework and made her way toward the door to open it to reveal her smiling boyfriend.
She smiled back.
“Hi.” He said smiling, very widely.
“Hi.” She got out before he leaned down and gave her a sweet kiss on her lips. She let him in before shutting the door behind her. Clark flopped down on her bed with an exasperated sigh and looked up at the ceiling.
“Looks like someone had a long day of campaigning.” The smile on her face never left as she sauntered over to a sleepy Clark.
“More like a long day of Lois.” He said in a weary tone.
“Well…as much as I liked to make a fool of myself at the ice rink…” She started innocently before hitting his foot and climbing on top of him until she was face to face with him. “We could always stay in tonight.”
He grinned as he looked up at her eyes and said cheekily, “Okay.”
She leaned down and kissed him. Their kisses erupted into passion as Clark put a hand behind Lana’s head to pull her lips harder on his. He turned them over to continue their sweet kisses.
Even though, their session had ended short and in a small argument, it was still nice to feel his lips on hers again. The way they looked so pink and plumped and so kissable. She could never resist them. But now since it was over between them, she had to force herself to resist them because they weren’t hers anymore. She chuckled bitterly wondering if they were ever hers to start with.
“God…” she sobbed as the pain in her heart increased by ten fold. It was really over wasn’t it? It was really real when he told her that he didn’t love her anymore?
She didn’t want to believe it and he didn’t either. They wanted to think of it as a bad dream, a horrible nightmare and that when they wake up all would be happy and dandy. It was like she never walked down the steps of the loft, it was like he never said the white lie…
It was like nothing ever happened.
But it did happen, they were just to numb to it all to realize what they had lost or walked away from. What had broken and what had died. What had been the truth and what had been the lie.
Time heals all wounds. Well, right now, time had opened all wounds for them. It was unbearable…knowing that they couldn’t touch each other or kiss each other anymore like they used to do.
Will they get over it? Maybe, eventually…maybe not. They dug a deep hole; a deep love. But when it finally ended, they had to climb back up - bare the pain. When they finally reached and got out of the hole, they’re left with cuts and bruises… scars. The pain isn’t there, but the scar is. A scar, that reminded them of what had been. A speck of darkness that surrounded them once they made it through the pain and hurt. Just…something to remind them of what they had and what had happened.
But when there’s darkness, there has to be a light. No matter how big the darkness is or how small the light is…there has to be a balance. Like the night, there are the stars, the bright shining stars that look only a few feet away but really billions of miles away. And then there’s the moon, half, full, a third, whatever size, its there. Bright and shining.
That’s what they needed. A light, a moon, maybe a star. Just…a tiny speck of light to know that everything was going to be okay again. A sign to show that there was something good about what they had and what had happened.
A plea, a beg, a cry for help, whatever it was, she said it.
“I need you Clark.”
And like that, a knock of fate decided that maybe they deserved a second chance.
She wiped the tears from her eyes and tried to will the tears away before getting up and answering the door.
She opened the door to reveal someone who she thought she would never see again.
There, soaking wet from the rain outside, was Clark. His head was bowed and his figure was slouched. He weakly lifted his head and looked at her red eyes with his.
What possessed him to come here was something unknown to him and something he didn’t care for…just as long as he saw her. He couldn’t take it anymore, his pain consumed him whole as the thought of not holding her or kissing her entered his mind while he was torn in the loft. He couldn’t take it, no matter how many times or how much he could convince himself that it was the right thing to do to break up with Lana…some where deep inside, he knew it wasn’t.
It hurt so much…just as much as it hurt to see her fragile body lying on the road…bloody and broken. But he wouldn’t let that happen to her, he would sacrifice his life for her before he would let that happen. This time, he was going to protect her, this time, he was going to tell her the truth, and this time,
He was going to love her like the way she should’ve been.
And it was all going to start when the clunk of his knees hit the floor and the sound of his arms weakly coming around her waist, pleading, begging, crying…for just one thing.
Forgiveness.
~THE END
Liked it? Hated it? Tell me about it. :) Hope you enjoyed it though....:D
!~
Clark stared into the darkness of the cloudy night as he stood perfectly still by the loft window. His arms were folded across his chest and his back was straight. His face was stone, no motion; not a blink, not a twitch. His movement was totally still and the only thing that had movement were the droplets of tears streaking down his cheeks.
A thousand knives pierced his heart as the painful memory did nothing but replay in his mind. Showing him...reminding him of what he had done. Of what he had lost and may never get back again. Someone so precious to him that he thought he could never touch again.
Sticks and stones can break my bones but words could never hurt me. Wasn’t that the saying? Well, whoever said that obviously hasn’t been in love before. Yes, sticks and stones could break the bones but words could break the heart. The heart was something to be treasured, to be taken cared of and to be loved. Not to be broken and stepped on like fragile glass.
The silence of the night couldn’t calm the rage inside him. Instead, it ignited it. He just wanted to break something…punch something to make the pain go away. He just wanted to unleash and breakdown.
The reality of it all was slowly sinking to him with each passing day and right now, reality was finally hitting him after three days.
She was gone. It wasn’t a nightmare and it wasn’t an illusion, she was gone. Stepped out of his life just as simple as she took the final steps down his loft after ending it between them; finally ending it between them.
He kept thinking that it was the right thing to do, to let her go; to help her let him go. He couldn’t string her along into his mess and keep her in the dark. It wasn’t right… but then again, what he did to her wasn’t right either.
But he just wanted her to let go . Forget about him and move on to someone who could make her happy and satisfy her needs. He couldn’t give her that because of who he was and ever shall be.
He turned around as he took a deep breath and wiped away the tears on his cheeks. Clark walked over to the couch and sat heavily down on it. He pulled his legs up to his chest and hung his arms over it as he stared into the blank void, reminiscing of the good times he shared with his angel.
A memory from last year’s barn raising entered through his mind as he shuffled through the good times. That had been the best summer of his life; he had everything he ever wanted or dreamed of. He was human and he loved Lana like she was supposed to be loved.
A bittersweet small smile tugged at his lips as he remembered what had happened when they were sent to get some nails back at the farm. It was just like yesterday that they were in his loft, being the naughty teenagers they were.
They entered the barn breathlessly from climbing up the hill. They held hands until Clark broke away to retrieve the nails.
“This will only take a sec.”
“No hurry, I think I need a break anyway.” She sighed heavily as she sat down on the big crate next to the tool drawers.
“Found em’.” Lana let out an airy laugh as Clark put the nails down beside her.
“You know sometimes taking your time isn’t a bad idea.” He smiled as she returned it with a dorky grin.
“Sorry.” He smiled apologetically at her.
“It’s okay.” She gave a toothy grin as she started to get up. “We should probably be heading back anyway.”
“You’re right…we should probably be heading back.” He gave her a mischievous smile as he stopped her in her tracks when she was about to walk pass by him.
Lana felt her heart race as she looked up at him lustful eyes as he reflected off of them. He bent down captured her lips in a passionate kiss as Lana wrapped her arms around his neck.
They both pulled away, breathless from the kiss and looked into each other’s eyes.
“Everybody’s waiting for us at the barn raising.”
“Which means we’re all alone…” she pointed out as Clark broke out into a boyish grin. They both ran up the stairs to the loft and initiated in a heavy make-out session that included lots of kissing and Clark’s shirt coming off, much to Lana’s delight.
From standing up to sitting down on the couch, the couple continued on with their private session.
He would do anything to have those kinds of moments again with her, but he knew it was impossible.
Just like it was impossible to hate her. He wanted to hate her, he wanted to be angry at her, but he couldn’t. He wouldn’t. She didn’t deserve it and he didn’t have the right to give it.
He just wanted to blame someone else for his actions but he knew he couldn’t, because it was his actions and his choices that put him where he was right now. He didn’t want to hold the weight of the world on his shoulders, he didn’t want to break up with Lana, he didn’t want to be an alien from a distant planet, and he didn’t want to loose his dad… He just wanted to be the normal farm boy, Clark Kent.
He buried his head into his arms and whispered the four words that she would long to have heard, lived for even, but nothing but the empty air was there.
“I love you Lana.”
~!
Lana came unlocked the door to her dorm room with books in her hand after coming from her last class of the day. She blew outwardly as she set her keys and books down on her bed.
She just wanted to change and jump into bed and sleep. The day had been a long and tiresome day and she just wanted to sleep. Lana glanced over at her desk and saw the scattered papers on it. She had busied her self these pass few days that she hardly had time to organize anything anymore.
Deciding that she should at least clean her desk up, she walked over to it and started gathering the papers together. She finished gathering her papers as she picked up the last piece that was scattered.
Almost instantly, her eyes of exhaustion turned into to one of pain. She picked up the object like it was going to break with the slightest of touches. It had several creases in the picture showing the many times it was folded, but in this case, crumpled.
She couldn’t remember how many times she crumpled the picture up out of anger and hurt and later on dig it out of the garbage. It was a picture that Clark and she had taken in a photo booth during the summer when they were together. They had been walking around the town just exploring when they came across a store that had a photo booth in it and Lana begged Clark to take pictures. He was a bit unsure at first because he was a bit photogenic but with a sweet smile from Lana, he could do anything.
There were four other pictures that were taken too, but this one in particular was one that Lana wanted to blow up to a regular sized picture instead of a small one.
Lana was smiling brightly in the picture but Clark wasn’t. He wasn’t even looking at the camera. He was looking at her. At the angle he was in, you could see his eyes just stare at her with affection. She loved this picture because in that one moment captured, she could see the love he had for her.
In that one moment, she could tell how much he loved her, how much he cared for her…she didn’t know how to explain it. It was like, in that one moment, he showed her his heart and maybe even gave it to her without her even knowing what she had in her hands.
It was a perfect moment. She always thought every time she looked at the picture. But ever since their...separation, every time she looked at the picture her heart ached so much.
It showed her the opposite of what they were now…in the present. They weren’t together anymore and she knew that they couldn’t be friends, it would hurt too much. Their relationship was broken beyond repair.
The secrets, the lies, and the four words ended the game of love between them…forever. The four words still ran through her mind like the plague. The familiar sting in her eyes started to surface as she thought more about it.
This was why she buried herself in her studies and busied herself to exhaustion. She didn’t want to face reality.
Didn’t want to face the reality that it was over between them.
Didn’t want to face the reality that he didn’t love her anymore.
Didn’t want to face the reality that Clark Kent didn’t love Lana Lang anymore.
The memory hit her like a ton of bricks as she remembered that fateful day three days ago. It was by far the worst moment of her life aside from her parents’ death.
She sat down on her bed and curled her legs up to her chest as she set the picture down on her bed. After all they’ve been through, it all ended like this. Heartbreak.
She tried to break down that wall that kept her from knowing the real Clark Kent. She knew there was something special about him…something very unique and she was so close to finding out until he shut her out…again. But this time, it was permanent.
She sobbed as she remembered a memory that took place on the very bed she was sitting on. She bowed her head down to her knees as she let the silence envelope her and let the memory over take her…even for just a moment.
She tried to calm her excitement when she heard the knock on the door signaling someone outside.
“Coming.” She set down her astronomy homework and made her way toward the door to open it to reveal her smiling boyfriend.
She smiled back.
“Hi.” He said smiling, very widely.
“Hi.” She got out before he leaned down and gave her a sweet kiss on her lips. She let him in before shutting the door behind her. Clark flopped down on her bed with an exasperated sigh and looked up at the ceiling.
“Looks like someone had a long day of campaigning.” The smile on her face never left as she sauntered over to a sleepy Clark.
“More like a long day of Lois.” He said in a weary tone.
“Well…as much as I liked to make a fool of myself at the ice rink…” She started innocently before hitting his foot and climbing on top of him until she was face to face with him. “We could always stay in tonight.”
He grinned as he looked up at her eyes and said cheekily, “Okay.”
She leaned down and kissed him. Their kisses erupted into passion as Clark put a hand behind Lana’s head to pull her lips harder on his. He turned them over to continue their sweet kisses.
Even though, their session had ended short and in a small argument, it was still nice to feel his lips on hers again. The way they looked so pink and plumped and so kissable. She could never resist them. But now since it was over between them, she had to force herself to resist them because they weren’t hers anymore. She chuckled bitterly wondering if they were ever hers to start with.
“God…” she sobbed as the pain in her heart increased by ten fold. It was really over wasn’t it? It was really real when he told her that he didn’t love her anymore?
She didn’t want to believe it and he didn’t either. They wanted to think of it as a bad dream, a horrible nightmare and that when they wake up all would be happy and dandy. It was like she never walked down the steps of the loft, it was like he never said the white lie…
It was like nothing ever happened.
But it did happen, they were just to numb to it all to realize what they had lost or walked away from. What had broken and what had died. What had been the truth and what had been the lie.
Time heals all wounds. Well, right now, time had opened all wounds for them. It was unbearable…knowing that they couldn’t touch each other or kiss each other anymore like they used to do.
Will they get over it? Maybe, eventually…maybe not. They dug a deep hole; a deep love. But when it finally ended, they had to climb back up - bare the pain. When they finally reached and got out of the hole, they’re left with cuts and bruises… scars. The pain isn’t there, but the scar is. A scar, that reminded them of what had been. A speck of darkness that surrounded them once they made it through the pain and hurt. Just…something to remind them of what they had and what had happened.
But when there’s darkness, there has to be a light. No matter how big the darkness is or how small the light is…there has to be a balance. Like the night, there are the stars, the bright shining stars that look only a few feet away but really billions of miles away. And then there’s the moon, half, full, a third, whatever size, its there. Bright and shining.
That’s what they needed. A light, a moon, maybe a star. Just…a tiny speck of light to know that everything was going to be okay again. A sign to show that there was something good about what they had and what had happened.
A plea, a beg, a cry for help, whatever it was, she said it.
“I need you Clark.”
And like that, a knock of fate decided that maybe they deserved a second chance.
She wiped the tears from her eyes and tried to will the tears away before getting up and answering the door.
She opened the door to reveal someone who she thought she would never see again.
There, soaking wet from the rain outside, was Clark. His head was bowed and his figure was slouched. He weakly lifted his head and looked at her red eyes with his.
What possessed him to come here was something unknown to him and something he didn’t care for…just as long as he saw her. He couldn’t take it anymore, his pain consumed him whole as the thought of not holding her or kissing her entered his mind while he was torn in the loft. He couldn’t take it, no matter how many times or how much he could convince himself that it was the right thing to do to break up with Lana…some where deep inside, he knew it wasn’t.
It hurt so much…just as much as it hurt to see her fragile body lying on the road…bloody and broken. But he wouldn’t let that happen to her, he would sacrifice his life for her before he would let that happen. This time, he was going to protect her, this time, he was going to tell her the truth, and this time,
He was going to love her like the way she should’ve been.
And it was all going to start when the clunk of his knees hit the floor and the sound of his arms weakly coming around her waist, pleading, begging, crying…for just one thing.
Forgiveness.
~THE END
Liked it? Hated it? Tell me about it. :) Hope you enjoyed it though....:D