She was 3. Years. Old. 3 Years Old!!!!!

[MBCorp]

I liked this episode, but oh dear god, why in the world is Lana still so hung up over the death of her freakin' parents? She was three years old when they died. I barely remember anything from that age! How the hell can she miss them so much that she'd practically kill herself to see them again? Clark's father has just died and he doesn't go on about Jonathan like Lana goes on about her dead parents. Geez, Lana's such a drama queen.:p

[shirkie]

Research has shown kids can't remember anything before the age of three, if I remember correctly. So she JUSTBARELY made the window for obsessive memory disorder, apparently.
shirkie

[shy175223]

well, I guess when you see your parents get killed right in FRONT you, I guess its kind of hard NOT to forget no matter how young the age.

[F-Stop Blues]

Exactly. I'm not going to pretend to know what thats like but she was very young. Isnt Nell much more of a mother to her than her real mother?

[Aloof]

I can remember things from when I was 3. :\

[jimmyolsenblues]

MBCorp she lost her parents, I know its just a tv show. But my parents are dead 18 years, you know what , it still hurts watching that episode.

[Rafael122]

Originally posted by shirkie
Research has shown kids can't remember anything before the age of three, if I remember correctly. So she JUSTBARELY made the window for obsessive memory disorder, apparently.
shirkie

Interesting, I can't remember anything from before the age of 13.

[shinedown]

a few weeks back i watched the entire first season and thats all i could keep saying every episode, "why is she so hung up over the parents that died so long ago" it isnt very realistic. clark is fine and so is lex and their parents died when they could actually remember them...

[Rosey]

Originally posted by shirkie
Research has shown kids can't remember anything before the age of three, if I remember correctly. So she JUSTBARELY made the window for obsessive memory disorder, apparently.
shirkie I hereby nominate Heather to be a Smallville consultant with veto power over the writers of the show. :lol:

[Aloof]

I can't remember anything before 3, but I can remember everything from 3 years old and up.

[angelfire east]

I remember something that happened to me when I was three, but only bits and pieces. My brother threw a rock and it hit me int he head, I'm afraid of blood so I freaked. I remember my parents freaking out and that's about it.

That was something "big" that happened to me, not as big as seeing my parents killed in front of me but still I really don't think Lana could remember that much. It happened so long ago and your so young you can't really remember much, mostly feelings (fear).

[shirkie]

I've got to figure out where I read that about memory and young children, but the brain just hasn't developed enough to have long term memories until about age three. For those of you who think you have memories prior to age three, are they actual memories, or are they ideas others have given you through stories? For example, I "remember" teaching myself to read at three and a half only because my parents have told me the story so many times. This is how the whole "recovered memories" movement started so many lawsuits with "recovered memories" of sexual abuse that turned out to never have happened... Because memory is such a constructed thing, so fluid, not set in stone-- it has to be recreated. Damn am I getting all philosophical or something!
shirkie

[Aloof]

I remember Christmas when I was 3. :D

[cotton candy girl]

Originally posted by jimmyolsenblues
MBCorp she lost her parents, I know its just a tv show. But my parents are dead 18 years, you know what , it still hurts watching that episode.

Amen. I haven't seen my father since about age 2, and although I don't remember him, it still affects me. Just making a point.

[coasterprincess]

The thing that bothered me about this episode is that it seems that the breakup was what started up all of Lana's upset feelings again. Even though she said otherwise that she was always alone...I'm just not buying it. Like a bunch of the other people here I think that she would probably have had some kind of healing over the 15 or so years since they died. While Clark is quite a catch, it's just annoying that a bad relationship with a guy could lead (though maybe not directly) to a kind of problem like that.

[cotton candy girl]

On the healing issue, maybe Lana should have experienced healing; maybe not. I think many of us without both parents in our lives are still affected by it.

[OutlawAngel]

I understand that losing a parent hurts. I lost my dad when I was 13 and it still hurts everyday but I can almost see how not knowing a parent(s) could be worse. I know there is that old saying 'you cant miss what you never had' but I dont think that is true. Espechally not when it comes to people you love. But I dont understand why Lana is as hung up as she is. But I can understand why it still affects her. I honestly think (seriously) the girl might need some psychological therapy. She needs to really talk to someone who wont just see her as the poor orphaned girl on the front of Time magazine as she seems to view herself as sometimes. I know it is just a show I am just thinking this as if Lana were a real live person.

[Shadowknight]

I lost my Father when I was 6, of coruse it will hurt. I still remember him from when I was 3, because I forced myself to not lose the memories

[jimmyolsenblues]

When your parents die at a young age their is no healing only a numbing of the pain. And that pain flairs up from time to time.

[sstray72]

First thing I remember is being smacked by some doctor.

[OutlawAngel]

Also was it jsut me or did she look more like she was 10 in that picture at the end?

[Aloof]

I remember a nasty storm when I was 3.

[xrayvision]

I remeber getting electrocuted when I was 2 or younger. I remember my father was brushing the black stuff that formed on my fingers (probably electrical burn). My mother told me I also fell down my grandparents staircase when I was even younger, but I don't remember that.

I also remember going on the subway with my mom and my father taking me to supermarkets. I even remember sitting on his lap and steering the car for a few seconds as he controlled the pedal & brakes, and I definitely remember hearing the fire trucks' sirens from the living room window of our apartment where I used to sleep.

I'd say it's normal for her to miss her parents whom she never had a chance to really know. What doesn't make sense is how she shut out Nell from her life. That was just bad writing in the earlier seasons. Nell was a great mother figure for Lana.

[Theshadow129x]

Yeah lana was saying it wasnt because of her relationship with clark but thats bull...she says she doesnt blame him but she does this the week after they break up. and she should be over it i mean why does it hang over her so much? its not her fault they got hit in the head with rocks that fell from the sky.unless she was the one who threw the rocks at them then it's different

[xrayvision]

I think she said that not to make him feel bad or show her vulnerability.

[OutlawAngel]

My earliest memory was when I think I was 4 and I was attacked by a dog. All I remember was being tackled and I was scareaming and then I remember him taking me outto the car to take me to the hospital and then I also remember being given a teddy bear by a doctor and that is all of it. So yeah I can see how Lana is still traumatized by her parents death she just hasnt handled the situation well at all.

[watcher4]

Originally posted by MBCorp
I liked this episode, but oh dear god, why in the world is Lana still so hung up over the death of her freakin' parents? She was three years old when they died. I barely remember anything from that age! How the hell can she miss them so much that she'd practically kill herself to see them again? Clark's father has just died and he doesn't go on about Jonathan like Lana goes on about her dead parents. Geez, Lana's such a drama queen.:p

I thought she was four when her parents died. Oh well:\ I guess I mis-counted. However, psychological, she was about at the age when a child is most vulneralbe to parental abandonmemt.

[Nospam]

Originally posted by shirkie
I've got to figure out where I read that about memory and young children, but the brain just hasn't developed enough to have long term memories until about age three. For those of you who think you have memories prior to age three, are they actual memories, or are they ideas others have given you through stories? For example, I "remember" teaching myself to read at three and a half only because my parents have told me the story so many times. This is how the whole "recovered memories" movement started so many lawsuits with "recovered memories" of sexual abuse that turned out to never have happened... Because memory is such a constructed thing, so fluid, not set in stone-- it has to be recreated. Damn am I getting all philosophical or something!
shirkie

In the book Why Things Are and Why Things Aren't, by Joel Achenbach, he asked several experts why children rarely retain memories before the age of two or three and, if I remember correctly, the reason is children at that age are unable to sequence their memories into a series of events. In other words, a child is unable to tell a story from memory and form what is called episodic memory.

I have very fleeting memories of my second birthday and a little older than that until I am about four. I can remember my mom putting my birthday cake in front of me and thinking, "yummy!" It's really more of an impression than an memory because the image in my mind is so fleeting. I also have a very vague memory of my mom putting our dachshund puppies into my bed for me to play with. Both memories involve strong emotions, so no wonder I remember.

[angelfire east]

posted in the wrong thread. Sorry

[Ares]

No matter what age you are , losing your parents in death .. Is a great deal of pain when your growing up an you want that mother or father guidence it hurts when you truely know you dont have it. An thats all you want more than anything in the World is to have another chance to be with them try an fill the "needs" you've always strived for growing up.

[midnite_spark]

my earliest memory was when i was around 3 to 4 when my older cousin dislocated my shoulder lol. every child's capability to store memory is different...

and i think the lana character is so caught up with her parents' death is becuz that was the only time that she was truly happy. no pain. no lies. no secrets. just joy. that's why she misses them so much...remember in the episode with lana's birthday party in season one? where she said her best memory was the drive-in movie with her parents?

everyone has their own reasons for holding on to something or someone...and it's especially hard to let go of someone than something.

[shy175223]

Originally posted by midnite_spark
my earliest memory was when i was around 3 to 4 when my older cousin dislocated my shoulder lol. every child's capability to store memory is different...

and i think the lana character is so caught up with her parents' death is becuz that was the only time that she was truly happy. no pain. no lies. no secrets. just joy. that's why she misses them so much...remember in the episode with lana's birthday party in season one? where she said her best memory was the drive-in movie with her parents?

everyone has their own reasons for holding on to something or someone...and it's especially hard to let go of someone than something.

Excellent post, good observation,!

[SlickBlonde]

Originally posted by Nospam
In the book Why Things Are and Why Things Aren't, by Joel Achenbach, he asked several experts why children rarely retain memories before the age of two or three and, if I remember correctly, the reason is children at that age are unable to sequence their memories into a series of events. In other words, a child is unable to tell a story from memory and form what is called episodic memory.


This is exactly right. It's not humanly possible to encode events into longterm memory or episodic memory before the age 2 at the earliest. Which is why it unrealistic for Lana to mourn her parents the way she does, i.e. longing for their warmth, their love, their embrace etc. She literaly would not even be able to concieve of some of these things at that age, much less be able to encode her experience of them into memory. Bigger more emotinally charged events can be remembered ( don't ask me how, its too long of story), like them being crushed by the meteor. That she could very possibly remember with clarity, but the other stuff, its just not possible.

[CallMeClark]

She has reason to. She grew up without parents... It's hard.

[cotton candy girl]

Originally posted by Ares
No matter what age you are , losing your parents in death .. Is a great deal of pain when your growing up an you want that mother or father guidence it hurts when you truely know you dont have it. An thats all you want more than anything in the World is to have another chance to be with them try an fill the "needs" you've always strived for growing up.

Yes.

And I don't care whether she is "supposed" to remember them or not. I don't remember my father (not that he's dead), but I definitely wish he was in my life. And it actually HURTS not having him in my life.

[SlickBlonde]

Originally posted by midnite_spark
every child's capability to store memory is different...



Great post, but his part isn't true. We all develope physically as well as psychologically at approximately the same pace. Our capacities for storing memories don't differ much at any given age

[muffinpeddler]

My earliest memory was at three. My parents brought my baby brother home and I thought he was some sort of toy, so I started pulling his nose. I don't think Lana would just be like "Whatever, I was three", but i also don't think she would as obsessive about as she is.


Originally posted by SlickBlonde
Great post, but his part isn't true. We all develope physically as well as psychologically at approximately the same pace. Our capacities for storing memories don't differ much at any given age

tell that to my classmates!:lol:

[myankskent]

This was a great episode for Lana because you finally got to see what she was really feeling, and you realize that it wasn't all about Clark, it was about her parents and how she never really recovered from what happened to them. Sure she has always needed someone, and I think that is why Lexana is going to happen. Lex will be there for her and they'll hook up briefly until she realizes how bad he really is. I see it as more of the fact that Lex is taking advantage of Lana's vulnerability and that is probably what is going to lead to them hooking up.

[muffinpeddler]

Lex is bad! He He He.

[Juaninzze]

So true, so true......

My mom died when i was 11 and i dont be doing what she does lol

[cmm]

Thing that bothered me with this episode is that the breakup affected her so profoundly. I refuse to believe the character is that weak despite how much I hate her. This eppy just seemed so out of place. Yah she broke up with clark but she's broken up with him before so why the i'm so weak i need to do a dangerous drug is ridiculous. I would of bought if the introduction to this eppy would have been her walking to class and overhearing a bunch of kids talking about this drug and hearing what it could do went to see about it herself. Through this she goes to try the drug sees her parents and from then on gets hooked. But the writers started off with this weak excuse that's she's sooo broken and depressed.

[Nospam]

Originally posted by midnite_spark
my earliest memory was when i was around 3 to 4 when my older cousin dislocated my shoulder lol. every child's capability to store memory is different...

and i think the lana character is so caught up with her parents' death is becuz that was the only time that she was truly happy. no pain. no lies. no secrets. just joy. that's why she misses them so much...remember in the episode with lana's birthday party in season one? where she said her best memory was the drive-in movie with her parents?

everyone has their own reasons for holding on to something or someone...and it's especially hard to let go of someone than something.


If anyone remembers, there was very nice scene between Clark and Lana where Clark setup a movie projector to project a Warner Brothers cartoon on the side of the barn while they watched from a convertible. It's the one and only moment between the two of them that I thought was actually romantic and, considering Lana's comment about her favorite memory of a drive in movie, quite poignant. I wish I could remember the episode, but I know it was season one.

As I am sure we all realize, our memories are often biased accounts of past events polished to a nice, sentimental shine.

[Aloof]

Whatever way Lex and Lana hook up, it's always a good thing in my mind!

[SlickBlonde]

i think what the writers are trying to do, is not emphasize that lana's feelings about her parents or what she did after breaking up with Clark are reasonable. I get the feeling they are trying to emphasize the general fragility of her character, (not as in TV character, but actual character). Not everyone takes things like loosing a parent very well, and I think lana is one of those people. Many of you sympathize with her pain, but I truely wonder if put in lanas shoes would you take some unknown drug to die and seedeceased loved one, knowing that you could potentially stay dead in the process. She's fragile, whether thats a result of her lifetime experience or a personality trait she was born with we'll never know. But I would assume its a combination of both. Like someone said earlier she's a great candidate for therapy

[myankskent]

Originally posted by cmm
Thing that bothered me with this episode is that the breakup affected her so profoundly. I refuse to believe the character is that weak despite how much I hate her. This eppy just seemed so out of place. Yah she broke up with clark but she's broken up with him before so why the i'm so weak i need to do a dangerous drug is ridiculous. I would of bought if the introduction to this eppy would have been her walking to class and overhearing a bunch of kids talking about this drug and hearing what it could do went to see about it herself. Through this she goes to try the drug sees her parents and from then on gets hooked. But the writers started off with this weak excuse that's she's sooo broken and depressed.

I think the breakup only gave her the urge to go and do this, but it's something that she clearly wanted to do for a long time now. She even said to Clark that even when she was with him, she always felt alone. Losing Clark just gave her the guts to go ahead and try to see her parents again.

[SlickBlonde]

Originally posted by muffinpeddler


tell that to my classmates!:lol:

I fyou refering to what i think you are refering to, I don't mean maturity, physical size or anything like that. I mean biological and mental capacity, scientifically speaking

[muffinpeddler]

Originally posted by SlickBlonde
I fyou refering to what i think you are refering to, I don't mean maturity, physical size or anything like that. I mean biological and mental capacity, scientifically speaking

No, they're just stupid.:D

[JD_lover5943]

Originally posted by MBCorp
Geez, Lana's such a drama queen.:p

AMEN. :rotfl:

[donellacandra]

i don't think it had so much to do with what she did or didn't remember about them. like chloe said, she was hurting and lonely and felt like she didn't have anyone to talk to. i think her reaction was extreme to say the least, but it was about the loneliness and wanting to be held and loved, not about missing her parents. yeah, she kinda said it was b/c she missed them, but i think that was just the best way she could interpret what she was feeling.

[Kris-El]

its not so much about remembering them as much as wanting to KNOW them! she never had that chance, and its really no wonder that she would go to such lengths knowing what we know of Lana.

she just wanted to know who they were and know that she was loved.

[hbkid21]

I can barely remember anything before 7.. I only really remember like 2 or 3 events in my life b4 then....But losing a parent or both is hard. It harder when didnt even get to know them. And it harder when you saw them die and it posted on a mag cover. She been thur alot which is y she would be so hung up.

[angelfire east]

Anyway MBCorp I agree with most of what you had to say.

[KANE POUND $QUAD]

Originally posted by sstray72
First thing I remember is being smacked by some doctor.


:rotfl: :lol:

you made my night

[vikingjedi]

Its not just that her parents are gone, she feels like she doesn't have anybody to turn to now after Clark broke up with her.

With Clark out of the picture she has a pretty close friend in Chloe and Lex who she doesn't completely trust. Thats it. Pretty difficult to cope with especially in college when you're just starting to find yourself.

[Kreukie]

Wasn't Lana 3 or 4 when she saw her parents die? So she does remember.

[SmallvilleMan]

Clark's father has just died and he doesn't go on about Jonathan like Lana goes on about her dead parents

Because Clark's too busy blaming himself.

[Bugbait]

Originally posted by shinedown
a few weeks back i watched the entire first season and thats all i could keep saying every episode, "why is she so hung up over the parents that died so long ago" it isnt very realistic. clark is fine and so is lex and their parents died when they could actually remember them...

Clark is fine because he has the "best foster parents in Smallville". How many times have others commented on how jealous they are of his parents? They're loving, supportive, and always there for him. In fact his parents are so good they are in no small part responsible for him becoming "Superman" (arguments aside about how fit he is to fill the shoes).

Lex is fine? Are you kidding? He has MAJOR father issues and it's more than hinted on many occassions that he would've been a better person if his mother was still alive. In fact the reason for his "descent into evil" is largely because of his father.

Regarding her "obsession" with loosing her parents, no one who hasn't personally experienced such a loss should be commenting. According to testimonials on this very thread it can be a hard thing. I won't comment because both of my parents are thankfully still alive and in my life. I have no context for it.

For those saying they are surprised at how the breakup affected Lana: I can list atleast 10 people who were in far shorter relationships and had far more negative fall outs. Did they overreact and take it harder than they should've? Sure, in my opinion but since I've seen it happen I don't find it unbelievable in any way consideirng that Lana has always leaned more towards "fragile" than strong.

[Nospam]

Originally posted by Bugbait
Clark is fine because he has the "best foster parents in Smallville". How many times have others commented on how jealous they are of his parents? They're loving, supportive, and always there for him. In fact his parents are so good they are in no small part responsible for him becoming "Superman" (arguments aside about how fit he is to fill the shoes).

Lex is fine? Are you kidding? He has MAJOR father issues and it's more than hinted on many occassions that he would've been a better person if his mother was still alive. In fact the reason for his "descent into evil" is largely because of his father.

Regarding her "obsession" with loosing her parents, no one who hasn't personally experienced such a loss should be commenting. According to testimonials on this very thread it can be a hard thing. I won't comment because both of my parents are thankfully still alive and in my life. I have no context for it.

For those saying they are surprised at how the breakup affected Lana: I can list atleast 10 people who were in far shorter relationships and had far more negative fall outs. Did they overreact and take it harder than they should've? Sure, in my opinion but since I've seen it happen I don't find it unbelievable in any way consideirng that Lana has always leaned more towards "fragile" than strong.

I lost my father when I was eight so let me comment and I say to Lana: suck it up. You were three. Get over yourself. By now you should have developed a network of friends and a life. Nell cares about you and Clark and Chloe care about you. Drop the self pity and just get on with your life.

Yes, Lana lost her parents but any feelings of inadequacy are hers alone. No is forcing her to feel this way and dwelling on the past is a sure way to lose the present and squander your future.

[Bob Cobb]

Clark was the same age when not only did he loose his parents but his entire planet.... But does he whine on and on?

[Bugbait]

Originally posted by Bob Cobb
Clark was the same age when not only did he loose his parents but his entire planet.... But does he whine on and on?

But Clark is meant to be a "superior" being.

[Pal-El]

Originally posted by Nospam
I lost my father when I was eight so let me comment and I say to Lana: suck it up. You were three. Get over yourself. By now you should have developed a network of friends and a life. Nell cares about you and Clark and Chloe care about you. Drop the self pity and just get on with your life.

Yes, Lana lost her parents but any feelings of inadequacy are hers alone. No is forcing her to feel this way and dwelling on the past is a sure way to lose the present and squander your future.

I love this post:cool:

[shy175223]

Originally posted by Bob Cobb
Clark was the same age when not only did he loose his parents but his entire planet.... But does he whine on and on?

Not exactly, Clark was just an infant when he had to leave to planet. Krypton is light years away from Earth therefore , he spent five years in a Spaceship traveling from another galaxy. He was five years old when when landed on Earth.

[Liriel]

Originally posted by CallMeClark
She has reason to. She grew up without parents... It's hard.

She grew up with a mother - Nell.

[Deia]

okay, on memory....

(I obsessivly research things from time to time, and early childhood memory was one of my obsessions a few years back)


Traumatic events (such as pain, death, shock, new sibling etc) will stick into a child's brain earlier, because they're out of the norm. This goes for later memories too. For instance, I can't remember a thing from some of the classes I took in college, but the two traumatic events that happened to me in college I can remember every detail, down to the clothes I was wearing. It's no different for kids. For instance, when I was two, I stuck my hand in a camp fire (because my bert and earnie finger puppets fell in hehehe) I remember that perfectly. I can also remember my parents buying me new finger puppets because I was so upset about loosing them (the new ones had plastic hair as opposed to real hair... what a bummer!) Can I remember anything else from when I was two? Nope. However, about six months later, my family took a boat trip up to Nova Scotia.... don't remember any of it... it wasn't traumatic. Pain especially is a powerful motivator in early memory. Does that apply to emotional pain as well? Dunno. But I'm going to assume yes.

If you look at most of the earliest memories that have been posted on this thread, pain is a pretty common denominator in most of them.

So, Lana..... it's likely that the pink princess remembers their death, and even if she remembers nothing/next to nothing about her relationship to her parents before that, their death, and her subsequent relocation to Nell's are big enough events in her life that it's very likely she remembers them. Someone mentioned that they forced themselves to remember their father, and I think it could be very likely that Lana did the same thing, or that Lana reconstructed the happy Eden-like life with her parents in her mind.

As to her needing to get over it: I've never lost a parent, but I had an uncle who died when I was young, and aparently I'm just like him.... I just more want to know if my family is insulting me or complimenting me when they say how similar we are :) It pains me that I never really knew him, and while I don't obsessivly dwell on him for hours of combined screen time, I do think of him, probably at least on a weekly basis.

So, in that sense, I can understand Lana, of course it must be even more painful when it's your parents, but, at the same time, you'd think that Nell would have put her pink butt in couseling by now......

[margroks]

This was a really stupid plot to begin with and much though I dislike Lana's nasty manipulative and selfish character it still seemed over the top. I always thought Lana was way too obsessed with her dead parents, traumatic though it may have been at the time. Even if the moment of their deaths was somehow seared into her memory, it still would take an absolute phycho to want to take drugs and die to see them again. Unconditional love? She couldn't know that because she was so young; it's just her obsession that makes her think she even remembers them for the most part. Hanging out at the graveyard to talk to them was bad enough but this? She's seriously deranged.

And her dig at Clark when she said she felt alone even when she was with him? How nasty can she be? That was Lana trying to make Clark feel guilty. She was saying that becasue he didn't tell her everything she wanted to know and becasue she couldn't be the absolute center of attention in their relationship and be in control that she had to do this psychotic thing and take drugs to see her parents.

Clark just lost his father recently. Clark lost his entire race but is he out taking drugs to die? Lana is the most unpleasant character I've ever seen. It's unbelievable that anyone would want her as a friend much less date her.

This was a terrible ep except for Clark talking to Jonathan and scoobying with Chloe. Clark should have dumped Lana a long time ago and he should never have jumped into bed with such a nasty girl, selfish girl in the first place.

[Billy Jor-El]

Originally posted by Aloof
I can remember things from when I was 3. :\

I have a hard time remembering what I posted on the last thread! :p

[hottietom]

Originally posted by shirkie
I've got to figure out where I read that about memory and young children, but the brain just hasn't developed enough to have long term memories until about age three. For those of you who think you have memories prior to age three, are they actual memories, or are they ideas others have given you through stories? For example, I "remember" teaching myself to read at three and a half only because my parents have told me the story so many times. This is how the whole "recovered memories" movement started so many lawsuits with "recovered memories" of sexual abuse that turned out to never have happened... Because memory is such a constructed thing, so fluid, not set in stone-- it has to be recreated. Damn am I getting all philosophical or something!
shirkie

I literally remember getting my diaper changed. I was wearing this outfit that I found in a box of my old baby clothes three weeks ago, and I swear I remember getting my diaper changed in it.

[auxvis]

It isn't something you can forget...First of all they died right in front of her which would be very dramatic...

Plus people all her life have been reminding her of it (see Time magazine article, etc)...

She grew up with Nell but that still wasn't her true parent...Nell didn't want to replace Lana's mother...

Now granted I think she gets a little obsessive about it at times but her being "hung up" on it is completely normal I would think

[Smallville is fun]

I think the fact that Lana has never known her parents was what made her want to see them. She probably only remembers her parents' death, if that. I understand why she would go to such great lengths to see her parents: because she never got the chance to have a relationship with them. Lex and Clark at least both had a while with their dead parents.

[Xsmallville_obsessedX]

I would probably be a little bit dramatic if I watched my parents get smashed by a meteor rock and blown to smithereens, too. Even if she was three, growing up without parents after you watched them both die has to be tough. Give her a break, will ya?

[photogirl]

I can't remember anything from when I was 3! 3!!!!! She shouldn't be so upset about them....for SO LONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yep, that really bothers me.

[F-Stop Blues]

I never wanted to get on Lana for how she feels about her parents becuase I dont have the right to do that because I never went through anything like that but why didnt she turn to Nell in this episode. I mean Nell raised her and is more of a mother to her than her real one. I just didnt understand that, Nell loves her unconditionally. She tried to make a family with Lana and her new husband but Lana wanted to stay in Smallville. It was just something that bothered me.

[Freemind]

Something tells me that anyone would remember their parents getting crushed by a meteor even if they were three.

[RedPhoenix23]

Lana did see her parents get smooshed right in front of her and then had that moment immortalized on the cover of Time magazine. Lana has also expressed that she does remember a few memories from when her parents were alive, like her birthday, her parents took her to a drive in and they watched cartoons- Bugs Bunny I think, and wasn't really the cartoon she remembered in detail, it was the feeling of love and safety she told Clark she had while being snuggled inbetween her parents. Clark even got Lex to hook him up with a projecter and a Bugs Bunny cartoon for Lana's birthday that year and they watched it in a car.

[attitudejc]

sure she might have seen her parents die and remember that event, but how would that help her remember things such as their personalitly? or thier "warmth"? i do understand that it is hard, but it has been a pretty long time.

[Jephael]

I do believe it's abit of a stretch in some cases to have Lana remember her parents like that, but the way her obsession effects Clark, turning him into a sympathetic wuss who blames himself for it is really what bothers me. Maybe if they'd quit being so insecure about themselves in this matter, they could both learn to move on!

[triplet]

Originally posted by shirkie
Research has shown kids can't remember anything before the age of three, if I remember correctly. So she JUSTBARELY made the window for obsessive memory disorder, apparently.
shirkie

Uhm.... maybe this is too much info, but I can remember being potty trained at about age 3 (my mom said), it was traumatic.

I would think anything that is traumatic like seeing your parents getting blown up in front of your eyes might stick with you.

I remember being potty trained after all, and that wasn't nearly as bad as seeing people I love dying in front of me in such a gruesome way that even a three year old could understand they're dead...

Even if she doesn't remember anything from the meteor strike or from before, I bet she misses the what could have beens...

Missing her father maybe someday walking her down the aisle...

Seeing her kids bounced on her dad's knee...

Their seeing her graduate from High School, college...

Someone to love her and not leave her...

Even if she doesn't remember more than vague impressions or images of them in faded photos, they're still important to her in so many ways.

Aunt Nell ain't the same as a mother or father.... Henry Small certainly didn't make up for their loss, not at all.

I don't think it's odd at all that she misses them, some 15 or so years later...

[smallville_fetish]

Originally posted by MBCorp
I liked this episode, but oh dear god, why in the world is Lana still so hung up over the death of her freakin' parents? She was three years old when they died.

And how old was Harry Potter when his parents died? Please give the girl a break since it's her parents for crying out loud. When it comes to that, it doesn't matter how old you were or when your last memory is with them, especially when there isn't much to begin with. How do you explain a mother who has a miscarriage who loves, misses, and thinks about her child everyday, when she hasn't even met her child? It's a parent-child bond thing, and it isn't like any other relationship "hung up" thing. There's nothing "hung up" about death or lost of a family member especially if it's a father or mother, and especially both at the same time.

[attitudejc]

and i understand that too, but it has been almost 16 years

[mobiusklein]

It doesn't give her the right to be an ass to people who DO open their hearts to her. It doesn't give her the right to send Whitney a Dear John videotape instead of being honest with him throughout S1. It doesn't give her the right to diss Nell because she wasn't perfect.

The guy who wrote "Maus" complained about his father's assy attitude even though the guy is a widower and was a Holocaust survivor. His father's wife, also a Holocaust survivor, also complained about his cranky ways. Tragedy is not a get out of jail ticket when it comes to personal relationships. My parents had a rough childhood but it doesn't stop me from getting pissed when they snapped at me that I have it easy or that my generation is a bunch of punks. Lana has no excuse to take her stuff out on other people or look down at their troubles because she lost her parents.

[smallville_fetish]

Yeah I understand that also. I also understand if she cannot forget that, but it's not like she brings it up and tries to hurt herself everyday. When Clark pushed her away even further, it just made her remember how alone she is and it made her miss her parents again even more. The only comfort she would've had left, but she didn't even have that.

[cotton candy girl]

Originally posted by triplet
Uhm.... maybe this is too much info, but I can remember being potty trained at about age 3 (my mom said), it was traumatic.

I would think anything that is traumatic like seeing your parents getting blown up in front of your eyes might stick with you.

I remember being potty trained after all, and that wasn't nearly as bad as seeing people I love dying in front of me in such a gruesome way that even a three year old could understand they're dead...

Even if she doesn't remember anything from the meteor strike or from before, I bet she misses the what could have beens...

Missing her father maybe someday walking her down the aisle...

Seeing her kids bounced on her dad's knee...

Their seeing her graduate from High School, college...

Someone to love her and not leave her...

Even if she doesn't remember more than vague impressions or images of them in faded photos, they're still important to her in so many ways.

Aunt Nell ain't the same as a mother or father.... Henry Small certainly didn't make up for their loss, not at all.

I don't think it's odd at all that she misses them, some 15 or so years later...


Triplet, I agree. And I don't understand why people seem unwilling to even concede a little empathy for Lana for her parents dying, no less in front of her. Is the hate for her character that strong that people can't even empathize with her obvious plight, not even a little?

Nevertheless, you made some excellent points in this post.


Originally posted by attitudejc
and i understand that too, but it has been almost 16 years

I don't think that kind of pain has a "statue of limitations", so to speak.

[Clark's Angel]

I also think besides remembering them because she lost them so traumatically, I assume that having not known her parents, she's replayed the few memories she could easily have about them with ideas and fantasies about them, until to her, it seems real. So it's the memory of wanting them that is probably mor real to her than actually having them, and that is what is driving her insane about it.

[mobiusklein]

The problem is she wants this ideal,perfect thing and I think that's why her vision was so . . . flat because she's smooshed them into a static photo. The second they really say something and poof, that perfection is over no matter what they say.

[smallville_fetish]

Originally posted by cotton candy girl


I don't think that kind of pain has a "statue of limitations", so to speak.

Well said cotton candy girl, I appaud and concur with those last words.

[attitudejc]

don't get me wrong, i don't think that she whines all the time. just this episode, and i think that the only reason that all the pain came back in this one, was because she saw them, talked to them, and almost touched them again after a really long time. thats why i think she whine, all the feelings of pain and loss came back.

[triplet]

Originally posted by cotton candy girl
Triplet, I agree. And I don't understand why people seem unwilling to even concede a little empathy for Lana for her parents dying, no less in front of her. Is the hate for her character that strong that people can't even empathize with her obvious plight, not even a little?

Nevertheless, you made some excellent points in this post.

Thanks, I'm talking from experience here myself...

My father died when I was a teen, which was a very long time ago, but I still miss him and even get teary eyed thinking of him.

I miss seeing how proud he'd be of my kids. But he died before they were even born.

He also died before I met my husband. Would he have liked him? Would he have approved? Would he have been proud to walk me down the aisle? What would he have said to me to send me on my way after the wedding?

I regret those missed milestones that he should have been there to see. My graduation, my wedding, the birth of his grandchildren, both the major and minor successes I've had in my life, my happy marriage...

Would he have been able to give me advice to avoid some of the pitfalls I'd had in my life? Would he have been able to help me figure things out when I was so aimless back in my late teens and early twenties?

I'll never know.

I can't remember the sound of his voice but I remember the feel of his large,warm, rough skinned hand holding mine and his wonderful belly laugh and the gorgeous smile of his that all his grandchildren have inherited. (My kids and my sister's kids all have his smile... it's both wonderful and sad.)

I've lived longer without him than I did with him alive and the thought of his passing still brings tears to my eyes...



Maybe it takes a tragic loss for people to understand, but I do understand Lana's continuing grief....




Originally posted by cotton candy girl
I don't think that kind of pain has a "statue of limitations", so to speak.

Truer words have never been spoken.

[mobiusklein]

I do think there IS a statute of limitations on sucky behavior stemming from losing one's loved ones. I don't see it as an excuse to tell someone that they don't measure up. Eventually, you DO stop crying. Eventually, you do throw away the toothbrush and give the clothes that will never worn again to Goodwill. You do not continually think snottily to yourself that the person who adopted you sucks ass next to an icon you built in your head.

Lots of people are taken in by their grandparents because their parents died. I do not think that it's OK to snark that they suck because they're too old to play with you because of arthritis.

[triplet]

Did Lana ever do that?

She had her problems with Aunt Nell, she moved out after all, but I think this criticism shows an incredible lack of empathy for Lana.

It's not like she's whined about her parents dying every episode for the past five years... I think it's mostly come up as a serious plot point slightly more than a handful of times, but this episode gave her an outlet to express that grief and maybe (finally) get past it.

She said herself at the end of the episode: I'm not going to be dependent on others as much.

So I believe she'll use the experience to help her move past the "whininess" that people often complain about with her.

She's growing up too, not just Chloe and Clark...

[mobiusklein]

And I think you'll be disappointed because she's leaping into Lex's arms next.

[cotton candy girl]

Originally posted by triplet
Did Lana ever do that?

She had her problems with Aunt Nell, she moved out after all, but I think this criticism shows an incredible lack of empathy for Lana.

It's not like she's whined about her parents dying every episode for the past five years... I think it's mostly come up as a serious plot point slightly more than a handful of times, but this episode gave her an outlet to express that grief and maybe (finally) get past it.

She said herself at the end of the episode: I'm not going to be dependent on others as much.

So I believe she'll use the experience to help her move past the "whininess" that people often complain about with her.

She's growing up too, not just Chloe and Clark...


Again, Triplet, that's my point, and you said it well. I'm not saying Lana is perfect or has an unlimited license to use her pain as an excuse to hurt others. My point is that she deserves some kind of empathic concession for the loss of her parents. And as you stated, maybe last night's episode was an outlet for her to maybe release some of the pain she feels.

Personally, I'm not talking about the drugs; I don't understand that plot point. I'm talking about, as you referenced, the progress she's seemed to have made in her statement that she wouldn't be dependent so much anymore.

I would think some people would at least think: "That's a start". But alas, it seems nothing she does is good enough; no progress is sufficient.

[MBCorp]

I've never lost a parent, so I can't even begin to understand the pain and loss that a person goes through when that happens, so I was probably being too hard on Lana when it comes to her feelings towards her parents. It's nothing that I've ever been through myself, so it's difficult for me to relate and understand her feelings in this situation. From the replies to my original post with people relating their own experiences with losing loved ones it's obvious that I was judging the character too harshly and being too critical about her in this instance.

[AngylWylde]

Absolutely!!! I just mentioned this in another post. It's downright ridiculous. AND - she has a living mother as well as father, for crying out loud. Nell is legally her mother just as Martha is Clark's. And of course her bio father is alive. Lana IS a drama queen and that isn't the only thing...

P.S. No, I personally do NOT think you are being too hard on Lana for this. I think you were absolutely right. And I know myself about losing loved ones and also at an early age. I too know that there are a lot worse things and circumstances. Other characters have it worse than Lana as far as family goes. At least she still has 2 living parents who care about her to varying degrees. Not so for Lex, Chloe has/had a bad situation with her mother and Clark just lost his father. So I think she has it better than all of them - quite frankly, she just won't take her head out of her @$$ to see it.

[RedPhoenix23]

I wouldn't really count her real father, he's a big boy and he choose his moody jealous wife over his daughter. And who says Lana doesn't love Nell? I don't recall her ever stating that. The only time Lana was ever really mad at Nell was when she wanted to move to Metropolis and Lana didn't, so Nell being a big girl too, choose to go ahead and move anyways and let Gabe Sullivan take care of her neice. Nell didn't even show up to Lana's graduation peeps! Lana didn't seem to mind, but that is a big deal. My aunts flew in from Texas and Kansas to see me graduate and neither one of them raised me as their daughter.

[AngylWylde]

Honestly, I didn't really like her real father. I wouldn't have wanted him as a father, either. But hey, he is really her father and he is alive - so there is always a chance that they can become close if she wanted them to. It's not like he is a monster ala Lionel. Far from it.

But as far as Nell, as I see it - Lana is the one who deserted Nell. She didn't want to move to Metropolis with her. I understand she didn't want to leave her friends, etc. But it happens all the time. Families relocate, etc. But Nell was her (legal) mother and aunt and her family and if she wasn't acting so self-absorbed she would have moved as well and been a family with them. That was Lana's fault, not Nell's. Nell had every right to do as she did and most kids would have moved with their family, but Lana didn't think enough of her to do so.

[cotton candy girl]

Originally posted by AngylWylde
Honestly, I didn't really like her real father. I wouldn't have wanted him as a father, either. But hey, he is really her father and he is alive - so there is always a chance that they can become close if she wanted them to. It's not like he is a monster ala Lionel. Far from it.

But as far as Nell, as I see it - Lana is the one who deserted Nell. She didn't want to move to Metropolis with her. I understand she didn't want to leave her friends, etc. But it happens all the time. Families relocate, etc. But Nell was her (legal) mother and aunt and her family and if she wasn't acting so self-absorbed she would have moved as well and been a family with them. That was Lana's fault, not Nell's. Nell had every right to do as she did and most kids would have moved with their family, but Lana didn't think enough of her to do so.

I absolutely disagree. I think Nell should have never left Lana, being a minor. First of all, Nell should have never tried to uproot Lana so close to graduation. Lana was established and had her school and friends. I think Nell was self-absorbed to leave her niece for a guy. That's what I call self-absorbed. She should have told that guy to wait until Lana graduated, and then they could have moved to Metropoils.

Nell's the adult, and barring a necessity to move, she should not have tried to uproot Lana and then leave her. It was Nell's decision to leave Lana, and that was her fault.

[attitudejc]

Originally posted by cotton candy girl
I absolutely disagree. I think Nell should have never left Lana, being a minor. First of all, Nell should have never tried to uproot Lana so close to graduation. Lana was established and had her school and friends. I think Nell was self-absorbed to leave her niece for a guy. That's what I call self-absorbed. She should have told that guy to wait until Lana graduated, and then they could have moved to Metropoils.

Nell's the adult, and barring a necessity to move, she should not have tried to uproot Lana and then leave her. It was Nell's decision to leave Lana, and that was her fault.

yeah, agreed

[clob]

I really buy the story that she miss so much her parents at the beginning of the show, but now I start to question myself she was a little girl and all the memories that she already share with Clark about her last birthday whit her parents and she said that was the last time she felt protected (or something like that) she was 2 years old, it's almost impossible a memory of that. But I think the character of Lana it's very needy of love maybe because after the meteors all the people saw her like the little girl that was so lonely and even she was so young she felt that change and that makes her feel empty and after all this years she's still caught on that feeling .

[Bugbait]

Let's see...

- Parents die in front of her while she's young: Okay, it's been 16 odd years so maybe she should've gotten over it.
- Her high school boyfriend dies at war.
- Several meteor freaks attempt to kill her, including Adam.
- Her Parisian man turns out to be using her and is a bit of a psycho (Jason).
- He watches her "first" and the man she loves die (Clark in Mortal), although he does come back.
- He plays yoyo with her before eventually dumping her.

Now, in context I don't see how it's unreasonable for her to become a bit of a junkie. Drama queen maybe but a self centered, nasty ***** as some have called her? That's harsh.

Chloe has her father and they seem close. Clark has Martha Kent who is arguably better than most father and mother combinations (until recently anyway). Lex is a disturbed puppy so he's not better than Lana.

[Watching Smallville]

Lana had Nell all the time she was growing up. I know of people who grow up with aunts as mothers and they're very close to them, as if it were their actual parent. I've never seen anything from Nell to suggest she was indifferent to Lana. She was kind and supportive whenever we saw her. Is she less worthy because she fell in love? I don't think so.

Not to say Lana hasn't had bad things happen to her, but I have often wondered about her focus on her parents as the reason for her loneliness. And she makes statements that puzzle me. She says to Clark she understands how he feels losing Jonathan, that the world seems to be spinning around you -- or something like that -- as if she recently had the same experience. It reminds me of her, "From the first moment I saw you" statement in Hidden. It just doesn't ring true.

I don't know what it's like to lose my parents as a very young child, so I don't feel comfortable commenting on how that must feel. It must be very difficult. But we do know that Lana grew up in a prosperous home, safe, fed, educated, sheltered, and cared for by a loving relative. She doesn't ever seem to acknowledge that.

[MBCorp]

Originally posted by Watching Smallville
Lana had Nell all the time she was growing up. I know of people who grow up with aunts as mothers and they're very close to them, as if it were their actual parent. I've never seen anything from Nell to suggest she was indifferent to Lana. She was kind and supportive whenever we saw her. Is she less worthy because she fell in love? I don't think so.

Not to say Lana hasn't had bad things happen to her, but I have often wondered about her focus on her parents as the reason for her loneliness. And she makes statements that puzzle me. She says to Clark she understands how he feels losing Jonathan, that the world seems to be spinning around you -- or something like that -- as if she recently had the same experience. It reminds me of her, "From the first moment I saw you" statement in Hidden. It just doesn't ring true.

I don't know what it's like to lose my parents as a very young child, so I don't feel comfortable commenting on how that must feel. It must be very difficult. But we do know that Lana grew up in a prosperous home, safe, fed, educated, sheltered, and cared for by a loving relative. She doesn't ever seem to acknowledge that.

Good post, Watching Smallville. You bring up many good points. Like you said, it's hard to comment on how a person should feel about losing their parents at a young age if you haven't went through it yourself. But it does seem as if Lana is overly extreme about it to an unrealistic, unhealthy extent and it always strikes me as being very off. I watched the episode again last night and again I felt annoyed by Lana in it and her obsession with her dead parents. I guess I'm just insensitive because I cannot emphasize with her obsession at all.:p

[Glencoe]

Originally posted by shirkie
Research has shown kids can't remember anything before the age of three, if I remember correctly. So she JUSTBARELY made the window for obsessive memory disorder, apparently.
shirkie

sorry but i have memories at the age of 1-5. so ur studies are wrong.

[Watching Smallville]

I have early memories, too, before age 3. But I think the point is that Lana hasn't incorporated the following years, when she was growing up with Nell, into her world view. She seems to feel like she never had a home at all.

[attitudejc]

if you ask me, everybody on this show whines.

[AnimeJoe]

I totally agree that every child is different and their memories will develop/work differently.

Until these so-called researchers/scientists test every living being on this planet then I'll never buy any of their findings as something that applies to every person in the world.

I came to the U.S. before the age of 3 but do have two memories from before that time that I always remember clearly. One of which produced a small scar on my eyebrow which I still have till this day, the other was the feeling of fear I felt while looking out of the plane's window and seeing the large stretch of land (Florida) below.

[cotton candy girl]

Originally posted by attitudejc
if you ask me, everybody on this show whines.

Yeah, probably everyone but Lionel, lol.

[RedPhoenix23]

He's too busy lusting after Martha to whine. He's never gonna get her, but I guess it is something constructive to do with his time.

[sstray72]

I'm not suprised at Lana doing what she did. I bet she's always wanted to find a way to go to the afterlife and see her parents. She was morbid as hell hanging out at night in a graveyard talking to her parents' graves. I think she was just happy that she finally found a way to do it.

[Watching Smallville]

You know, I never thought of that. She was in that graveyard a lot. Okay -- it makes more sense to me now. ;)

[attitudejc]

oh yeah, i completely forgot about her going to the grave yard.

[Praxis]

Originally posted by shirkie
Research has shown kids can't remember anything before the age of three, if I remember correctly. So she JUSTBARELY made the window for obsessive memory disorder, apparently.
shirkie

It's not true. I have memories from less than two years old. Very, VERY few, but I do have some.

[HalJordan4184]

YOu all are misreading Shirkie's quote. As most people who have come out and said it's false have attested to, most of the memories people have, are of extremely painful, or traumatic events. Or, even just an extremely emotional event.

By that quote, she was referring to day to day memories. YOu can't remember what you had for breakfast on a given day when you were two. It's only bit's and pieces here and there, because, as has been proven, children can't develop memories in the ways an adult can. They don't form sequenes of events in their head. It's just random snapshots, with no real lead in's or payouts so to speak.

Also, a lot of people's "memories", are manufactured after the fact. People don't always remember what they think they do. If they hear a story enough times, or get enough details, they subconsciously create the incident in their head, and their brain convinces them they've remembered it all along.

[AnimeJoe]

I doubt many can remember what they had for breakfast on a given day when they were 15 :p.. I can't remember what I had for breakfast 3 years ago ;)

[HalJordan4184]

That's taking it a little extreme.

But you get the point. There aren't day to day, sequenced memories in little little kids. from birth to about three, there are very very few things that stick out in your memory. Mostly they involve extreme psychological, or physical pain, or emotional reaction. You won't remember just being contect sitting in a high chair as a baby, because there is no reason for your brain at that point, to burn that into your memory so to speak.

Think of it like RAM, and a hard drive. From 0-3, you're running solely off of the RAM. It's just used to drive the day to day functions, but most of the time, you don't have any memories of what happened two seconds ago, much less last week. Even when seemingly important stuff happens, you don't remember, because the brain just writes over it, as it wasn't emotional, or physically traumatic in some way. But when something is really emotionally or physically traumatic, it becomes that first saved file on that hard drive. And as you get older, you can start consciously saving those files, and accessing more of them. But you still don't have the first ones, because they were all just functions of the RAM, and just kept the program going, without any lasting effect.

[triplet]

Originally posted by mobiusklein
And I think you'll be disappointed because she's leaping into Lex's arms next.

Who will be disappointed? Me?

No, I won't be. I actually like the Lex/Lana interaction right now.

It makes sense in a way, they have a lot in common if you think about it... Too bad Lex can't be a nice guy and deserve whatever affection will develop between them.

I don't see Lana being happy when she finds out how really manipulative he's been....

Clark may have lied to her and been emotionally closed off, but at least he didn't oversee unethical human experimentation, bankroll environtmentally damaging weapons systems, and hire a woman to steal Clark away from her.

The truth will eventually come out and she will be very, very angry I have a feeling...

[amus525]

Originally posted by Rafael122
Interesting, I can't remember anything from before the age of 13. :rotfl: :rotfl:


Originally posted by sstray72
First thing I remember is being smacked by some doctor. :eek: :rotfl:
very intresting

[Praxis]

Originally posted by HalJordan4184
YOu all are misreading Shirkie's quote. As most people who have come out and said it's false have attested to, most of the memories people have, are of extremely painful, or traumatic events. Or, even just an extremely emotional event.

By that quote, she was referring to day to day memories. YOu can't remember what you had for breakfast on a given day when you were two. It's only bit's and pieces here and there, because, as has been proven, children can't develop memories in the ways an adult can. They don't form sequenes of events in their head. It's just random snapshots, with no real lead in's or payouts so to speak.

Also, a lot of people's "memories", are manufactured after the fact. People don't always remember what they think they do. If they hear a story enough times, or get enough details, they subconsciously create the incident in their head, and their brain convinces them they've remembered it all along.

Really? Because the memory I have from before I was two is being in my mother's Algebra class. I described the room to her and she was able to tell me which teacher and classroom I was describing. I even remember the green marker and x's and y's on the board.

I don't think that's a 'traumatic' memory, especially since I turned out to be a math nerd (Calculus at 15) ;)

[HalJordan4184]

Note, I said most, and you probably can't place that memory in any kind of context. Why were you there, what all was going on, all of that. It's possible to remember something that for some reason sticks out. It doesn't necessarily have to be traumatic or extreme, but 99 times out of 100 it will be. But while you may remember being there, you probably don't remember what anyone talked about, or any of the contexts surrounding the circumstances that put you there to begin with. You simply remember being there.

[Kal-El 2005]

I remember quite alot of stuff from when I was 2, and it was cause of something major (of which i shall not disclose) so I think if it was something as big as my parents being killed I would sure as hell remember!

[attitudejc]

yeah, she would remember her parents being killed, its the fact that she remembers ONE time when they went to a movie, it wasn't tramatic or anything, thats why we are wondering why she remembers that.

[Watching Smallville]

As someone who does research for a living, I'm a little skeptical about research results on "human subjects." In so many cases, after a few years go by the results turn out to be wrong. And I'm not even sure this particular research helps the argument on either side.

So I'm going to give Lana credit for her memory. It's probably been embellished over the years, the way she tends to embellish some of her other statements. But I'll assume it's based in some actual event. I still think she dismisses her time with Nell to her own detriment. That's my take. Everyone thought she had the perfect life, so what was missing? Nell didn't seem unkind or indifferent. What was missing was Lana's ability to latch onto what she had rather than what she lost. Her focus on her parents seems to have robbed her of her own happiness.

Maybe it was such a deep trauma, she never recovered. Or maybe she didn't appreciate what she had. It seems to me like she did have a chance to be happy and not to feel alone. But I can't say. I didn't lose my parents at age three.

[AnimeJoe]

But while you may remember being there, you probably don't remember what anyone talked about, or any of the contexts surrounding the circumstances that put you there to begin with. You simply remember being there.

But like I said before, the same exact thing can happen regarding things that happened just a few years ago.. I doubt that anyone here can remember complete details of some of their high school years :p..